Kayla50

It won't be inpatient. It probably should be. I wish I knew how FMLA worked. I don't want to lose my job but I am drowning here in my disease.

Threshold

Big hugs...I think your making that appointment is more than a baby step, it's real good solid step in the right direction.

I agree, given the circumstances, that you should discuss with your dr about getting a medical leave. Do you work for a large company? Some of them have built in systems for this sort of thing.

If your dr has not taken your situation seriously, or is making you feel like a failure, it might be time to find another dr who will work WITH you. First consider whether or not you dr was putting you down, or your own sensitivity was acting up there. I do not know the circumstances, but I know that sometimes we project things. I've let my own sense of self shame sometimes keep me from taking help that was offered because I thought they must be thinking the same things about me that I was.

You can do this, I'm so glad that you post here with your feelings and situations, so much better than turning to a drink.

Raider

Kayla clean out your inbox so I can PM you. Loves.

waterscapes

Kayla: The law I was referring to in my previous post is FMLA (Family Medical Leave Act).

KissMyTiara

Please google FMLA. It's pretty clear the minimum requirements for coverage. If you have an HR dept at your company they can answer your questions. I recall you are a dental assistant. If its just a local small dentist you probably are not covered. Some requirements are the employer must employ 50 people within a 75 mile radius. Also you must have worked 1250 hours in the last year.

Kayla50

Yeah, I'm not covered.

JustMeg

I don't have any advice that I can add Kayla, but agree with Threshold that your decision seems like a big and brave step, well done I hope that you can get get the help and support that you need. I'm sorry for the pain that you are feeling just now and send you warm wishes for your recovery, Meg.

ScottFromWI

That still doesn't mean you cant seek and receive help Kayla. There are a lot of free and low cost resources ( and I think you said you have health insurance too ) that can help. And it doesn't preclude your employer from voluntarily offering to give you time off to get the help you need - good people are hard to find and many employers would much rather see you get better and come back to work vs having to retrain a new employee.

The bottom line is you need help, because if you don't get it you will probably lose your job anyway at the rate your alcoholism is keeping you from doing it. Have you called your local AA hotline or alcohol crisis hotline?

Kayla50

Yes. Spoke with a counselor today. My anxiety is coming back full force as the day starts to end. My plan was to sleep a lot today and I did not. I am soo exhausted and cannot take this any longer.

ScottFromWI

What did your counselor recommend? Drinking again is only going to make everything even worse. Why not try an AA meeting?

Kayla50

Nearest one is forty minutes away and I look and feel like crap. Need a shower and sleep. Counselor says I probably need medical detox and intense outpatient therapy.

Kayla50

Tried calling an AA buddy but she never answers. Asked another one if she would sponsor me and she said not until I'm sober! I guess I don't understand any of this.

ScottFromWI

You will only get better when you take the effort to get the help that you need Kayla. I know it seems hopeless and you feel helpless, but honestly making up excuses as to why you cannot seek the help you need will keep you right where you are.

If you need medical detox and it has been recommended to you by your counselor, then seek it. Call the local AA hotline, don't rely on a friend. They are staffed 24/7. Or have your counselor call a detox center and check you in.

Bottom line, you need to make the next move. Crawling into bed and hiding won't make it any better, and drinking will make it even worse.