anchorbird

I am really starting to feel uncomfortable with many things said and done in AA. I don't really want to get into all of it, but I am just wondering if anyone here started their sobriety in AA, but then left and continued on their own. Thanks.

autan

Yes, I did. I found that being Sober was not a one size fits all solution. Thats not to say the work they do isnt of benefit to others.

soberclover

I sporadically attend AA. I, however, love reading the Big Book and I do strive to work on the Twelve Steps. There are many different types of support that we all use it seems like. I'm sure over time you will find what works for you. The most important thing I've learned in my recovery is that it is important for me to have people in my life who can give me honest and constructive feedback on my thinking..it is kind of wacky sometimes.

letustrythis123

The first and last time I went, I stopped at the liquor store on the way home. The people there were completely different from me in every way imaginable and I could not fathom going back. It did not feel like my regular crowd of people. I will probably go back if I have a craving soon. But I'll find another center to go to. I live in a very small town so there are very few. I'm also afraid of running into one of the neighbors or a friend of a friend.

least

I used to go to meetings, never worked the steps tho. I stopped going and found all the support I needed in my weekly counseling sessions and daily visits to SR.

sillysuzanfree

I have been sober since May, 2012...I have not been attending AA meetings lately for some of the reasons you list above...I also find some of the meetings a bit cliquey (and I've been to a lot) I am still sober but I still feel like I need to do the steps and am looking into my church's 12 step program for now...I am not going to give up on it completely yet though. There are good meetings out there and good people in the program...I'm just finding them to more the exception than the rule lately.

KateL

I went intially then continued on my own and I second autan's post x

bigsombrero

Like others here, same goes for me. I attended regularly for my first month, then I'd attend sporadically from time to time. After a few experiences that felt somewhat invasive of my personal life, I stopped attending. I have also done addiction therapy, SR, and I work on my own recovery daily on my own and with trusted sober allies.

I know I can always go back to AA meetings whenever I want, and I won't hesitate to use the resource again if needed - but "the program" isn't a great fit for my independent lifestyle.

1newcreation

Try diffrent mtgs till you find the 1 that suits you but don't discard a program that's been around for 80 yrs just coz couple of recovering drunks have ego issues or what have you. Aa is a buffet: you go put on your plate what you love to eat & go home satisfied. Sure some people irritate me but I just ignore them

Olive1

I went to AA a lot for about the first six months. Then I started going less and less. Have still been known to attend every so often.....I like that I can just go when I want to and will be welcomed. I like being around people that mostly understand what I have been through. I never did the steps.

Pete55

I work the program of AA as best as possible, may not be perrrrfect, I'm human, ha ha
and attend at least 2 -3 AA meetings per week.
Have tried other ideas, read books, suggestions from this forum, but at the end of the day I like to meet up with friends at meetings.

Then there is life outside of AA.

ScottFromWI

If you can honestly say to yourself that the program of AA ( and not the specific people in your meetings ) that doesn't work, then move on. Whether it works for others or whether others left is irrelevant. This is YOUR sobriety and you need to do what is best for you. And I would say that regardless if the specific recovery method you are using.

gracetuesday

For me, I find the point of AA to be there to help others - it is not all about what I will get out of going there. No AA group is perfect, but I have found it very helpful to have a group of people who understand what it is like to be alcoholic.

Hiwayman

I was court ordered to AA off and on for over 20 years. I hated that program. Way to many control freaks and hypocrites for me. Back when I was going the worst were the old timers. Going only to pick up on the newcomer women. The whole time preaching AA. Even the men councilors from all the treatment centers where involved. They say its a “suggested” program. Well don’t you believe it. They cram all those steps down your throat and they somehow firmly believe if your having problems your not working the program. What a crock. I’ve been sober now for around 12 years. And have never gone to a meeting. You have to find what works for you and to H*ll with anyone who disagrees with you. I quit taking it all too serious long ago now. That is except me being sober. And I find it far easier if I mind my own business.

Happy Trails
Hiwayman

Dee74

Just a reminder to those who may have forgotten or do not know

We have many different kinds of recovery at play here at SR.

All we ask for is a little respect for others beliefs.

D

courage2

Hi Anchorbird --
I went to AA pretty intensively for about 11 months. And stayed sober. Then quit working the steps, and dropped my sponsor. And I've only been to 2 meetings in the last month. And I relapsed (briefly, I hope) the other day.

Probably anyone will tell you that it looks like AA was keeping me sober, and I should go back. Oddly, anyone except my former sponsor, who is the only person I've told about the relapse outside SR, and who knows me pretty well. Strangely enough, she's helping me look for a solution outside the program.

I don't think which program you choose matters as much as how willing you are to change.

LegallyBrunette

AA works for a lot of people. For those people it is an awesome transformative program. I believe in it...Just not for me. If I had stayed I would've began drinking again because it was so draining. I am still struggling with the fact I "failed at AA," but I know like all things in life recovery surely is not one size fits all.

Vandermast

hey man

I attend aa, but also share your views in regards to it.

my participation in it ebbs and flows.

one thing I do believe is that i have a zero tolerence policy in regards to alcohol and drugs entering my system.....no ifs buts or maybes.

i also practise mindfulness and meditation which helps me immensely.

peace

v

Mentium

I'm not 100% comfortable with the AA approach either but I go because nothing else has kept me off the booze and in terms of a cost/benefit exercise it is the lesser evil!

I started to drift away last November - reduced the number of meetings, expressed a lot of misgivings etc and lo and behold I drank.

I am weak willed and find it hard to stay sober on my own. The main thing AA provides for me is the companionship of other alcoholics who know exactly what one is going through. I take some of the other bits that feel right for me and leave the rest.

I would anticipate a tailing off in due course - maybe a year down the line - but I'm not in any hurry.

Kevin78

I was in Rehab in the Summer of 2008. I attended about half a dozen AA meetings. I then stopped and continued to be sober for about another 18 months. I did however attend a weekly group meeting for a while after my Month detox, I was only allowed to go for 12 months as this was part of the deal for ex patients. I feel I need to attend some sort of group, and AA is the only thing available to me that I know of. Apart from SR. I remember it being mentioned before in AA, that the group was not there to be enjoyed, but to stop us from lifting a drink. Anything enjoyed would be a bonus. I am going to try AA again as I am really wanting to make a go of it this time. I never worked the steps before, as only there a short time. Day 6 sober for me today, and got the Doctors appointment this evening.

Feeling positive for once here.