Originally Posted by Bobster

Thanks for the perspective. I'm in my mid 30s.

Taking a big pay whack hurts. It's not like I can go get an MBA now.

Originally Posted by GreenBottles

Oh one more comment bobster. If you include all the costs of stupid decision making due to been beer-heavy that you made in your own domestic life over the last two years of drinking PLUS the cost of the beers then that 30% cut is probably about what you were losing anyways not to mention health costs down the track.
So justify your loss by quiting beer for good.
You might see your ex boss in a month or two and he will see a totally new person again, like the old Bobster and he will ask you if you want to come back....
Things dont sound too bad mate as long as you kick that poisonous crap out of your life THEY the oligarchies who own our slave-state governments LOVE us to drink beer at the end of the day cause it keeps us all docile and dumbed down.

Originally Posted by bigsombrero

You asked how I deal with regret? Well, I regret lots of things. I regret not sticking with my first girlfriend...and my second...and that gorgeous brunette I hung out with 3 years ago. And so on, and so on.

I was once a fairly high-level manager at an Ad/PR firm and had a nice office on Michigan Ave in downtown Chicago. View of Grant Park and Lake Michigan out my window every day. Meetings on the 80th floor of the AON with posh PR firms, major drug companies, and the whole nine yards. I had money, nice suits, had risen up the chain and was still just in my mid-30s. After 10 years at the company, the alcoholism got me, and I had to quit my job because I simply couldn't handle it anymore. I was unemployed for over a year, spent my entire savings on booze and ended up broke, alone, and in the hospital and nearly dead. No girlfriend, no money, no job. The last of my money was spent on treatment...and thank god, it has stuck.

Fast forward 1.5 years and I'm still sober and I work with a start-up technology company. I make a fraction of what I used to make, and my responsibilities are pretty low-brow sometimes. My hope is that the company does well, and that I can once again work my way up, little by little. I'm basically starting my professional career over from the bottom, at age 38.

But you know what man? I wouldn't go back to that old job if you paid me a million dollars. I have had to change my ENTIRE LIFE over the past 1.5 years...the way I see things is different now, and I live by a new philosophy. Going back to that old job - even with the pay - would be a huge step backwards for me. Almost like if you made me go back to high school or something. A pointless regression.

You really need to know what your'e facing with this sobriety thing here. I drank my entire life and had no clue how to live as a sober adult. You'll have to face some major obstacles and dealing with them along the way is a huge job in itself. Again, I highly recommend you keep your recovery as a top priority....you will soon see what I mean. Sobriety is a wild, intense ride and you will need a lot of time to devote to this project. Don't even worry about that old job right now, I'd say.

Originally Posted by PaulinaPolitely

The message at church this a.m. had kind of an interesting tack, one that might be appropriate for your situation.

We as human beings seldom go in a straight line, as in make decisions in an orderly fashion leading to our goal. Our goal isn't always the right one anyway. Example given re: life - is it like making a movie (where you can do 20 "takes" to get the scene right), or more like a football game, where there is only one shot, and a fumble or turnover or ? can change the entire direction of the game. Life is more like football. We don't get "do-overs" in life, we make decisions, sometimes mistakes (as we see it in the present) and move on from there.

I must say though, without drinking some of the goof-ups I make (just naturally) I would attribute to drinking, when in reality some of my dumb mistakes happen regardless.

You're young, but I look back to lots of decisions and directions I went in, and in the end they turned out more "right" than had I originally thought. Had I been able to orchestrate every outcome, my life wouldn't be what it is today.

Down the road it will be clear what happened, and you'll be in a better place because of it.

Originally Posted by Squizz

This. If this is your definition of hitting rock bottom, you're WAY ahead of the learning curve. I went to jail twice, was homeless twice, got a DUI, etc. before I finally quit for good.

Don't let that fool you though: You probably *are* an alcoholic. Quit while you're ahead.

Originally Posted by autan

Hi Bobster,

This is not the time for regret. It is a time for celebration of the non-alcoholic kind.
You have identified that you need to free yourself permanently from alcohol, this is a wise decision. It clouds our judgement and we make mistakes.

You are not at the end of your journey, but the beginning.

Is there anyway, you can talk to your old boss and explain to him, that you feel you have made a big mistake in leaving and you would like to apply for your old job back at 10% less salary for the trouble you have caused them.

If not work hard at your new job and focus on your recovery, when and where possible apply for better positions and higher pay, getting rid of alcohol will enhance your life not hinder it.

Originally Posted by Vandermast

hey bobster

best of luck with your resolution to quit

we are here for you

just hang around and soak up the atmosphere of recovery mate.

namaste


v

Originally Posted by Bobster

Thanks.

Got a shrink and he said I don't sound like an alcoholic, I just sound like a self-sabotager.

Maybe I'm just an idiot.

Originally Posted by autan

Have you accepted it is time to move on ?

Make the most of the job you do have and stop thinking about what you could have had. Start making the most of your new job and you never know there may be an opening back your former place of work in the future.

Originally Posted by halfvictory

Bobster: Like you, my drink of choice is craft beers, mainly IPA's. Someone could stick 20 Bud Lights in front of me and I wouldn't care. But 20 IPA's - I loved those things. Loved them enough that I found myself having them every night. Even nights where I told myself I wouldn't drink, I found myself having at least one. It just wouldn't stop.

And, like you said, IPA's and other crafts can get very high in alcohol content. Me, at 43 years old - 6 IPA's would get me drunk, not plastered, but it did the job. Hopefully, I'm done with it now.

By the way, I got an MBA at 38; started it at 36