Rough Night one
 

So, I have a tolerance to Librium apparently, so I'm finding it's not easing my withdrawal symptoms like it used to. I have all the fixins of alcohol withdrawal except the neurological agitation, extreme anxiety, and sweats. (thankfully those are the worst parts)

Shakes, nausea, slight confusion, irritability, pins and needles.

Really sucks. I'm having a hard time with it this time. Just keeps getting worse and worse.

Stick with it, Justin! Do whatever it takes to make this stick.

I don't know if this could help you, but when I have nausea I drink chamomile/peppermint tea. Or if you don't have the peppermint chamomile alone could help. From everything I have read on here from others, it will hopefully get better for you. Good luck.

it will be ok buddy.
maybe do some reading?
organize a sock drawer?
make a list of reasons to be sober
make a gratitude list?

yeah it will get better. I've detoxed a lot so i'm no stranger. i've been on here posting quite a bit tonight to distract myself.

You never have to do this again if you don't want to. Just remember it will be better soon. If things take a turn for the worse don't be afraid to call your doc. Withdrawals generally get worse every time, so please be safe.

Sounds like you have some positive thoughts. I have never detoxed, just stopped. Luckily I didn't suffer withdrawal. My blood pressure was suffering badly from drinking. Do anything to help yourself. I wish you well.

I feel generally ok. Doc said to monitor my resting heart rate if i got worried. If it was really high, (it's not) call him and he could talk to me about a higher dose.

The rule of thumb is 300mg a day. I just took about 175 in the last 8 hours.

My withdrawals are weird. People say they have them for days, but I could put a timer on mine and it is always gone after about 30 hours of no drink. Some lingering stuff stays around, but after night 1 i'm aces as far as detox.
But I won't fall asleep till like 3:00 A.M. It's 9:45 here.

well then by my calculations you only have to make it about 5 more hours.
easy enough right?

I think so. I was of course black out drunk last night when I quit drinking so it could vary a few hours here to there.

My problems are my chronic relapses. I have so many triggers that force me to drink. Therapy helps, but now I have to switch therapists because shes doesn't take United.

i had one main trigger... life.

I shouldn't say "force me to drink". That's my issue. I'm a little 2 year old girl wanting a Popsicle at the first sign of distress.

Very frustrating to detox over and over and over while not sleeping. Up until two days ago, sleep was getting good, exercise was great. Now I've fu$ked it all up AGAIN.

yeah safe I agree. Just crap every day that goes on. I have OCD as well, so I'll see something totally mundane to most people, and dwell on it the entire day.

Maybe tmi, but the bathroom at work is laid with 1" tiles with a blue pattern. I have to avoid that bathroom because one of the blue tiles is off by one. so ridiculous.

how dare they.
so have you thought about working a program of anykind any more?

Yes I will be doing AA, therapy, and maybe some SMART Recovery.

awesome... so glad to hear that.

I just have to find a way to make time for it. I work in St. Louis. There are tons of meetings and all that, but I have to find a place to do it so i can stick with it.

Also, I'm only 26, and I have found that almost all of them are in their 60's and even 70's. The stories still help, but it would be nice to find some groups that were younger.

There's this older guy who hugs everyone in the room, and with the aforementioned OCD, this has led to me bringing hand sanitizer to every meeting.

The OCD is quite funny usually. People at work laugh about the bathroom tile story all the time.

By the way the alcohol withdrawal is pretty much over. Shakes gone, headache gone, pins and needles gone...

Just have to deal with insomnia for four days now and I'll be good to go.

i have been sober since about 24
... i am 29 now.

wow five years. that's fantastic.