scared
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Join Date: Jan 2014
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scared
I've been an alcoholic since age 17 I'm only 21 but I've been drinking on average ever night for 4 years. The longest I've gone without drinking was 26. I'm so ashamed and disgusted with myself that I let this pattern go on for so long. I found this site about 6 months I just signed up tonight though. I love reading everyone's posts it makes me feel less a lone. I'm going to my first AA meeting tonight with my sister who has been sober a little over a year. I'm beyond nervous,this is only my day one. I'm so sick of living like this I feel so guilty that the longest I've ever been sober is 26 days. I'm young but sometimes I feel like I'm damaged beyond repair. Sorry for the rant I'm just looking for support.
Hey Samantha, Welcome to the Forum!!
You'll find loads of support here!! . . . Don't be too hard on yourself, for us all things spiralled one way or another and we all had to start at a Day 1, the great thing though is your 21yrs old and have plenty of time to turn things around!!
You'll find loads of support here!! . . . Don't be too hard on yourself, for us all things spiralled one way or another and we all had to start at a Day 1, the great thing though is your 21yrs old and have plenty of time to turn things around!!
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Join Date: Jan 2014
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I went to the meeting with my sister I was so nervous I felt like I was about to pass out, it was an hour long I stayed for about 15 minutes and went to the car and broke down in tears. I'm glad I checked it out I was terrified to speak, everyone was going around the room. I heard story's and it hit such a nerve because I could relate so much. I'm going to keep going to meetings even if I'm nervous and will try to get the courage to speak. I really feel like AA and posting on this website really could help me. I just want to thank everyone that posted, or anyone who is reading this and feeling like they can relate.
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Join Date: Jan 2014
Posts: 3,293
Samantha
Sounds like you are ready for a change. You should feel good that you made it into the room. Many people never do. It took a lot of courage to do what you did. You should feel proud of yourself. You took the first step to a much happier life. Keep it up.
Sounds like you are ready for a change. You should feel good that you made it into the room. Many people never do. It took a lot of courage to do what you did. You should feel proud of yourself. You took the first step to a much happier life. Keep it up.
Samantha4343, you are FANTASTIC, and it is only natural to be afraid of change even if it's for the good. I wished I had quit at 21, would have saved myself a lot of pain and suffering. Just picture yourself with that $100,000 or so you're gonna have in the future by quitting now. Rootin for ya.
you're definitely not beyond repair and you've been deeply blessed to come to this conclusion so young and with so much joyous life ahead of you.
You can do this, and you'll be happy and free for it.
Good that you have someone on your side, you've got this place, AA is a great tool... you're well on your way!!!
You can do this, and you'll be happy and free for it.
Good that you have someone on your side, you've got this place, AA is a great tool... you're well on your way!!!
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Join Date: Jan 2014
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I get down on myself when I think about how I've damaged relationships with people and can't remember certain events or things that I've said,I keep on repeating the whole should of would of could thinking .
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