40 days...but feeling depressed
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2013
Location: Southern California
Posts: 74
40 days...but feeling depressed
Hi all. Today is day 40 for me. The holidays are over and my kids who were here for the holidays (they live out of town) have all left as of today. I guess I am feeling kind of frustrated and depressed. I don't think my kids, or my own siblings for that matter, have any idea how much hard work it takes to stay sober...especially over the holidays. It's not that there was any drinking going on in my home, but just insensitive comments, actions made by them, and conversations taking place that are unpleasant for me. I actually thought this morning...I might as well drink...obviously, my sobriety doesn't seem important to them...and they are the main reason I stopped drinking in the first place! I hope I don't sound like I am having a pity party for myself...just needed to vent to those of you who will understand.
Kaleidoscope eyes
Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: London
Posts: 5,243
People are just absorbed in themsleves, even our own family at times. It was good that you did things for them but it is more imortant that you can do it for yourself, and think,'I'm an ok person.' It doesn't really matter what ohers think or how rthey behave. It will get better but kids and others will always be looking out for themselves xxxx
Member
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Ireland
Posts: 25,826
Yeah it can be a lonely place recovering from an addiction, no one else is too bothered when we are constantly thinking about it 24/7! . . . shifting the focus from them to doing it for you will help you to keep pushing through!! 
Member
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Finger Lakes, NY
Posts: 521
Originally Posted by waterscapes 
I actually thought this morning...I might as well drink...obviously, my sobriety doesn't seem important to them...and they are the main reason I stopped drinking in the first place!
The folks I know that don't have a drinking problem just don't understand how difficult it can be. I don't think your family doesn't care, I think they just don't realize how hard it is. We do!
All of the times I quit drinking, it was always for someone else. And I always failed. If you really want to quit and stay quit, you need to do this for YOU. That is the only way sobriety has worked for me this time. Good luck!
Member
Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: Daytona Beach, FL
Posts: 425
Most people are NOT alcoholics and addicts. It's really hard for them to understand the mental fortitude we have to draw on sometimes to STAY sober. For us the natural state is to be numbed. So for people who don't struggle with this - don't understand. It's just NO BIG deal, put the drink down. Don't do drugs, etc. Yeah riiiiight like taking a box of EX-LAX and say "Ok don't go to the bathroom" Sorry for the analogy, but that's what addiction is, a physical, psychological, and emotional problem - for which we can't just flip a switch and say "OK I'm all better see?!" I got depressed when my kids left too after the holidays. That's us always looking for a distraction, next thing, to make us happy because we are not happy with ourselves. Leaves us alone with all of that crap that made us use substances in the first place. Might I suggest an AA meeting or go to coffee with a friend? I always feel better getting out. Get a pedicure strike up a conversation with the nail tech. I have heard some great stories from them! Hang in there.
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