Sober22

Hi I'm Al, new to this forum but not new to the world of alcoholism.

I have a fair few days under my belt now thanks to Antabuse and a supportive family but I cannot work out why my head keeps fixating on a time in the future when I am able to drink again. I desperately want to stay sober and love sober life but wake up with the mind set that "it will all be ok, I can have a drink again soon" I don't know if it's a mental block or some type of safety net but I wonder if anybody else gets these thoughts.

It's not so much day to day that alcohol nags me, it's more about the future.

Thanks


Al.

autan

Yes, I have just spent the past 10 days or so telling myself I could drink normally. Guess what ???

I can never drink a single drop again. I take some comfort in that, now I can get on with my sober life.

Michael66

Hi Sober. I think different people cope with that pressure in different ways. Some take it a day at a time - being sober today is always all you ever need. I found that I did have to come to terms with the idea that I was embracing life-long sobriety. That was by far the hardest step for me. Once that step was taken the giving up was much easier, but it took me years of on/off drinking to get to the point of accepting that the only good future lay in total sobriety.

Nonsensical

Yes. I call it addiction.

Part of my own brain is betraying me. It has mistaken alcohol for something I need. If I tell it "never" it gets very uncomfortable. If I tell it "in ten years" it feels safer.

That little Sh!t living in my head has been lying to me for 25 years. It does not deserve to feel safe.

Welcome to SR! Best of Luck on Your Journey!

autan

top post !!!

EverySngleNight

Hi. Welcome to SR! I think you'll like it here. Everyone is so supportive and there is a TON of good information and wisdom.

I totally relate to what you're saying. It's really important to pay attention to those thoughts and acknowledge them- rather than just allow them to take over. Even though you find yourself thinking "one day I can", you know that it will only have a negative outcome. It's hard to reconcile knowing you shouldn't, with the idea of "never again". It can be very anxiety provoking. That's why it's good to take it moment by moment...in bite size chunks. :-)

If you haven't already, it may be good to look into AVRT.

Congratulations on taking your first steps!!!

Inca

Yeah I had those thoughts for years, even after going to treatment. What finally got me was a couple of really bad drinking experiences that made me realize that even if I could drink again, I wouldn't want to test it because the drunk me is NOT pleasant and is downright scary, unpredictable, and INSANE. Now I have no doubt that I should give it up for life. We all have our own path, I just hope that others out there are not as stubborn as I was and don't have to get to that horrible place before coming to the realization that it's just not worth it.

Sober22

Thanks guys, have taken a lot from your replies.

Mentium

I think it is one reason AA people tend to think og staying sober 'one day at a time'. Personally I find that unhelpful as I would like to think I have more control over my life than that. Evidence to the contrary - that I don't - is readily available however..

Toffee1

I think that in the early stages of sobriety the one day at a time approach is the best. You can feel that sense of achievement as the days start to stack up. The future will take care of itself

KateL

It might help you to do the one day at a time thing if you are over thinking your future and then go from there. Good luck xxx