dfaz81

Firstly let me introduce myself.

I'm 32 and have been drinking regular since I was about 15 years old, my issues have really started over the last 10 years. Whilst I don't consider my drink problems to be serious enough to effect my working life or my families life it's enough to have me concerned.

I drink pretty much every evening of the week with maybe the odd rest day here and there but during a period like this Christmas break from work I basically drink an amount that would have some people falling off chairs in shock.

Long term I know this is going to cause me health issues and effect the length of my life with my children.

I'm not going to insult people with the usual I drink less than you stuff as I know everyone is different but we all have in common is we're honest enough to admit drink is an issue in our lives.

I just want to make it so I have a few drinks at a weekend like my mates, it just seems this isn't possible for me though I need to drink through the week.


Any advice guys?

Nonsensical

Welcome dfaz81!

Sorry to say I can't help you. I tried everything I could think of for 25 years to make this my reality, but all of them failed. I had to accept that I can either have drinking in my life or I can have everything else I want. I am incapable of having both. (I chose the everything else option.)

Best of Luck on Your Journey!

Anna

Alcoholics cannot control their drinking, though most of us here have tried countless times to do that.

If you decide to stop drinking for good, we are here to offer support.

ClearMind

I'm sure you realize you do have an issue with alcohol because you're posting on this forum. For myself personally, moderating is impossible. I am an addict, so if I see a benefit to having one drink, I will see a benefit to having 100 drinks. And if I do manage to moderate my drinking to just a couple of beer on one particular night, it feeds the animal inside me and it will be non-stop in my head, thinking about when I can drink next. People don't think of the psychological side to moderation, only the short-lived physical side of it. If you decide to not drink again, then it works to remove this incessant voice. Just my $0.02

hayley86

Welcome dfaz81, i don't have any advice on moderation. I was never able to moderate my drinking. The only thing i can do is abstain from alcohol completely. There is lots of support here if you want to quit. Best wishes.

Thepatman

Welcome to SR

I progressed from occasional drinker, to weekend drinker to, every night drinker, to all day smashed faced drinker.

The addiction is progressive for most of us. I had to stop completely to regain my life. Once I had one, it was like all hell broke loose and went on
Full blown binge.

KateL

Good for you x

dfaz81

I appreciate all your kind words and reading some of the advice I can see a lot of sense, there is no sense in saying I'd like to drink in moderation as if I could drink in moderation I wouldn't be posting on here would I.

I just find it really hard to imagine a life without the social drinking side to it, I go football, I go out socially with friends and I unwind in the evening with it. The only way I can possibly see any of that happening is if I moved our family elsewhere and started a full new life, that's never going to happen though and it wouldn't solve the evening unwinding drinking anyway.

I think this is the reason I feel I need to find a way of moderating as I just don't believe I can change my life enough that I will be out of it long enough.

It scares me to think of what I could be like if I hadn't got my two children, and it scares me even more to think of what it would be like if it got a grip of me and effected their lives.

ScottFromWI

Odds are you will find out because alcoholism is progressive and it sounds like it already does have a grip on you if you are unable to stop, even if you aren't drinking massive quantities yet.

I personally went from being an every day drinker to a maintenance drinker ( where I NEEDED to drink just to make it through the day ) in a period of just months, and that was after drinking like you on a daily basis ( but not "out of control" ) for almost 2 decades.

The bottom line is this...alcoholics cannot moderate their drinking, ever. You need to decide if you are an alcoholic or not. Fortunately you have a golden opportunity to do so while you still have your health, family and job.

diffingo911

This is a quote from the AA Big Book about Moderation-It applies to MANY of Us here...

"Most of us have been unwilling to admit we were real alcoholics. No
person likes to think he is bodily and mentally different from his
fellows. Therefore, it is not surprising that our drinking careers
have been characterized by countless vain attempts to prove we could
drink like other people. The idea that somehow, someday he will
control and enjoy his drinking is the great obsession of every
abnormal drinker. The persistence of this illusion is astonishing.
Many pursue it into the gates of insanity or death."

AL

Nonsensical

Let's play WHAT IF...

Speed the calendar ahead 20 years and one of your children comes to you and says:
Would your advice be:
Always good to look at an issue from multiple perspectives, I think.