83mama0f2

Visiting family, feeling weak! Help!

LadyBlue0527

You're stronger than you are giving yourself credit for because you just took the time to post this. You can do this! Think about tomorrow and how much happier you'll be that you didn't drink!

Bruce292

Hang in there! If you can, give yourself a little break. Lord knows that family can push our buttons. When family starts getting to me I give myself a micro break. I take a quick walk, I see how the cat is doing, or sometimes I go for a drive to pick up dip or something. Anything to divert my attention. There have been times where I sat in the bathroom and read a book. Anything so that when I wake up in the morning I'm free of the self inflicted injury of drinking.

Leana

What exactly is causing the problem? Are they drinking? Is it just stressful? Does it involve bad past memories? Or do you just want to be in the safety of your own home? Figuring out the problem may help with the need to drink.

deeker

Quick break out the reminder post Hope it helps

We drank for happiness and became unhappy.
We drank for joy and became miserable.
We drank for sociability and became argumentative.
We drank for sophistication and became obnoxious.
We drank for friendship and made enemies.
We drank for sleep and awakened without rest.
We drank medicinally and acquired health problems.
We drank for relaxation and got the shakes.
We drank for bravery and became afraid.
We drank for confidence and became doubtful.
We drank to make our conversation easier and we slurred our speech.
We drank to feel heavenly and ended up feeling like hell.
We drank to forget and were forever haunted.
We drank for freedom and became slaves.
We drank to erase problems and saw them multiply.
We drank to cope with life and invited death.

Seabee

You got this! Tell that voice to shut it!

JackieC

I, like Bruce, have escaped to the bathroom when visiting family. Other times, I've just said I was really tired or didn't feel well so I could either leave and go home or, if I was staying there, go up to where I was sleeping and get in bed.

It sounds like your family isn't a safe place for you for some reason or another. My family isn't a safe place for me so what I've been working on is realizing that if I offend them by needing some space right now, then that may just need to be how it is, particularly my parent that is a nonrecovering alcoholic. All the years spent covering for him and keeping his secret -- and I'm still worried about hurting his feelings. Anyway, it's something I am trying to remember when I get all caught up in what my family thinks about whether I make it to various family functions.

You can do this. Come here for support.

JaylaaKent

Drinking never makes ANYTHING better - and I never regretted NOT drinking.

Dee74

Stray close to SR 83mama - read some of your old posts if you need to remind yourself about what's at stake.

D

DoubleDragons

I got through my family visit sober. It was my biggest, hardest test to my sobriety. I feel so relieved and happy and strong. Give this gift to yourself. You won't regret it.

malcolmsloan

I agree with doing something to get a little break. On x-mas day, at my in-laws house, when the mimosas started flowing, I sat on the porch for a bit to gather my thoughts. You can do this, it is, afterall, what you really want.

83mama0f2

I only felt weak because I was surrounded by people drinking yummy beverages, not because they were driving me crazy. And people kept offering me drinks. I haven't told anyone on my husbands side that I quit drinking. It helps that my brother in law quit too, but for health reasons not related to alcoholism. He's got Cystic Fibrosis, and found that it dehydrates him and makes him bleed more, even in small amounts. So that made me feel better(not for him though:/). And my SIL is breast feeding a 2 month old, so she was out too. Anyway. I got through it. Had a fleeting thought to just have one but instead had a virgin cape cod at the open bar at the party. It wasn't too bad.

83mama0f2

It was really more about the socialization aspect. I'm less outgoing if I'm not drinking, but it challenged me to open up some more so that's good. And I was the DD back to the hotel for my drunk husband.(he doesn't do it that often) and our kids. That felt good, knowing we were safe.

ImperfectlyMe

The first several social situations can make you feel like a fish out of water. Not only will this get easier, but for me, it's almost entertaining to say,"no thanks, I don't drink". I kind of always wanted to be that person who simply said that with no other explanation!

Great job fighting the temptation!

83mama0f2

Had another dinner tonight with family. Everyone was drinking wine but it's was more of a small dinner setting, not bottles of alcohol sitting out and a big bowl of punch and wine everywhere like at the last party. didn't even feel tempted. It helps that my family knows I quit drinking and doesn't offer it anymore

LillianGish

I love this. I want to be that person too. I think I will be! Thank you for the thought.

83mamaof2 ~ great job fighting through a tough situation, and staying close here before you drank. That's great!