Made it so far...gonna be a rough night.
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Join Date: Nov 2013
Posts: 10
Made it so far...gonna be a rough night.
I just booked a hotel for myself tonight, because the insanity of my family is too much to take. I know at my core that if I spend hours hanging out tonight at my parents' house, the temptation between all my favorite wine and everything and also the nonstop parade of childhood triggers and inevitable "why aren't you drinking???" conversation is a really dangerous situation that I just don't want to put myself in when I'm only four months into recovery. Flying solo in a hotel room is a bit of a trigger in itself, but it is the lesser of two triggers in this situation, I think. Still, I need to make sure I am prepared and not making it worse. I am bringing lots of snacks and bad movies to watch. I did request no alcohol in the mini bar when I made the reservation, just in case.
This is just such a hard time. Four months is a hard zone to be in, and to have it overlapping with the holidays (first sober holidays ever, my other attempts have always been after New Year's.) It feels simultaneously lonely and stiflingly oppressive to be around my family, who I don't really enjoy on the best day, and they are really at their worst during the holidays. Drunk as skunks and vindictive and invasive and ugggh.
I see Christmas night alone in a hotel room as a good opportunity to really take stock of the last four months, lay out some goals for 2014, and shift some stuck energy in my life around a lot of things. Also a chance to order pizza and drink sugary crap with total impunity.
Anyway, big fist bumps of solidarity to all those struggling tonight. The hotels in my town are pretty empty and I got a smokin' deal, so remember that is an option in case things get ugly for you....we can all watch Christmas claymation together and drink our weight in Shirley Temples.
This is just such a hard time. Four months is a hard zone to be in, and to have it overlapping with the holidays (first sober holidays ever, my other attempts have always been after New Year's.) It feels simultaneously lonely and stiflingly oppressive to be around my family, who I don't really enjoy on the best day, and they are really at their worst during the holidays. Drunk as skunks and vindictive and invasive and ugggh.
I see Christmas night alone in a hotel room as a good opportunity to really take stock of the last four months, lay out some goals for 2014, and shift some stuck energy in my life around a lot of things. Also a chance to order pizza and drink sugary crap with total impunity.
Anyway, big fist bumps of solidarity to all those struggling tonight. The hotels in my town are pretty empty and I got a smokin' deal, so remember that is an option in case things get ugly for you....we can all watch Christmas claymation together and drink our weight in Shirley Temples.
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