Ready for a new beginning
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2013
Posts: 6
Ready for a new beginning
Hi everyone,
This will be my first real attempt to go sober. I am in my late 20s and I've come to the realization that I've wasted too much of my life feeling bad and missing opportunities.
I just got through my first semester of professional school and struggled because of hangovers, avoiding social situations so I could drink at home, and general mental fuzziness that made learning twice as difficult.
Alcohol has had a huge impact on my relationship. I'm lucky that my partner has stuck with me for the past three years despite my drunken outbursts, emotional unavailability, and mental instability. My main concern is the impact his drinking will have on my ability to get sober. He is a beer geek and drinks frequently, but I don't feel that he has the same problem that I do. He fully supports my quitting. He is ready to be done with my getting embarrassingly drunk or yelling at him for minor issues that I push down inside until I've had too many. I haven't made a plan with him but he already plans to not leave alcohol in the fridge. Have others had experience with quitting when in a relationship with someone who still wants to drink on occasion?
I have never been an every-day drinker. My main issue is that I look to booze when I'm experiencing high stress, and when I start, it's rare for me to stop until I'm completely obliterated. For a long time, I thought I would not have to be someone who stops completely. Now, I realize that I do not have control. When I look back at how many times I've blacked out and put myself in dangerous situations, I feel so ashamed and regretful.
I have avoided AA because I am an atheist. Is it worth trying regardless? Have other nonbelievers had positive experiences in AA?
Thanks for reading. This is only day three for me. I'm really looking forward to feeling healthy again.
This will be my first real attempt to go sober. I am in my late 20s and I've come to the realization that I've wasted too much of my life feeling bad and missing opportunities.
I just got through my first semester of professional school and struggled because of hangovers, avoiding social situations so I could drink at home, and general mental fuzziness that made learning twice as difficult.
Alcohol has had a huge impact on my relationship. I'm lucky that my partner has stuck with me for the past three years despite my drunken outbursts, emotional unavailability, and mental instability. My main concern is the impact his drinking will have on my ability to get sober. He is a beer geek and drinks frequently, but I don't feel that he has the same problem that I do. He fully supports my quitting. He is ready to be done with my getting embarrassingly drunk or yelling at him for minor issues that I push down inside until I've had too many. I haven't made a plan with him but he already plans to not leave alcohol in the fridge. Have others had experience with quitting when in a relationship with someone who still wants to drink on occasion?
I have never been an every-day drinker. My main issue is that I look to booze when I'm experiencing high stress, and when I start, it's rare for me to stop until I'm completely obliterated. For a long time, I thought I would not have to be someone who stops completely. Now, I realize that I do not have control. When I look back at how many times I've blacked out and put myself in dangerous situations, I feel so ashamed and regretful.
I have avoided AA because I am an atheist. Is it worth trying regardless? Have other nonbelievers had positive experiences in AA?
Thanks for reading. This is only day three for me. I'm really looking forward to feeling healthy again.
2Cor5:17
Join Date: Feb 2013
Location: Between Doctor's opinion & pg 164
Posts: 4,187
Welcome chip
The fact that I'm writin you is proof aa does work! Used to be an intolerant believer but coz of this program, I've learned to love & tolerate folks who don't believe the way I do. It's a spiritual program not religious. When the serenity prayer is said @ start, just sit there quietly & when everyone stands @ end for Lord's Prayer, simply slip out. I sure do hope a God whom you don't believe in doesnt come btwn you & sobriety!
The fact that I'm writin you is proof aa does work! Used to be an intolerant believer but coz of this program, I've learned to love & tolerate folks who don't believe the way I do. It's a spiritual program not religious. When the serenity prayer is said @ start, just sit there quietly & when everyone stands @ end for Lord's Prayer, simply slip out. I sure do hope a God whom you don't believe in doesnt come btwn you & sobriety!
to SR! I hope we can help you stop drinking for good. 
Member
Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: Gatineau, QC, CA
Posts: 5,100
Welcome to SR! AA works for many and is a great program.
But there are other options you can lookup on SR or google. Look for things like, Rational recovery, AVRT, Smart recovery, Urge Surfing technique etc.
As for your boyfriend, he sounds very supportive. But please remember you are doing this for yourself.
Good luck, post as much as you need and ask questions, or just spill your guts if you need to.
But there are other options you can lookup on SR or google. Look for things like, Rational recovery, AVRT, Smart recovery, Urge Surfing technique etc.
As for your boyfriend, he sounds very supportive. But please remember you are doing this for yourself.
Good luck, post as much as you need and ask questions, or just spill your guts if you need to.
EndGame
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: New York, NY
Posts: 4,677
I've known plenty of self-described atheists who've gotten sober in AA. Sadly, the reality is that some people may give you the fish eye about your beliefs, but in my experience, the overwhelming sentiment is to help people new to AA to achieve sobriety, regardless of their beliefs.
From one perspective, AA is indeed a "God program." Yet I don't believe that believing in a transcendent being is mandatory in order to get sober.
From one perspective, AA is indeed a "God program." Yet I don't believe that believing in a transcendent being is mandatory in order to get sober.
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