jdooner

I shared the other night in a meeting. Society's view of men. Perhaps Holywood driven…we take care of things. We are tough, don't cry. We provide stability - may or may not be the breadwinners but internally we largely associate and self identify with these traits.

My father growing up always prided himself on having an amazing sense of direction. In fact, each time we would get lost he would refrain from pulling over and asking for help bc you know he such an amazing sense of directions.

I think being a man is knowing when to ask for help, directions and reach out to people and professional around as tools to improve ones self. Its also alright to show emotion too.

lorelei

A man that cries, who can say how he feels and provides for his own is worth so much more than a Hollywood ideal. Nice post jd x

Twinings

I'm not sure it stems from hollywood but that certainly doesn't help to perpetuate the masculine and feminine roles that are expected of men and women.

Thankfully, things have moved on since the days where men believed they had to be tough and women should be in the kitchen... but they still haven't come far enough.

Nice post! men and women should be whoever they want to be without fearing if they are complying with their assumed gender role.

Whiterhino24

I have struggled with this for a long time. I always thought i never lived up to my dads expectations and felt deppressed about it. He is a guy that is self made never needed help and if you fall just get up and rub some dirt on it and you will be fine type of guy. No emotion at all. I am different i struggle with emotions and how to deal with them because the way i was taught does not work for me.

jdooner

Maybe your dad just did not know how to express and could have benefitted from some help sometimes. I think generationally asking for help gets easier as you move down in generations.

My dad told me he was glad he didn't have my "bug." Funny, I support my dad financially bc he lost his house, marriage and every material item to his gambling addiction and is still in denial about it.

happyperson

There is no one way of being a man or a woman. We're all different. Personally I find the most important part being true to myself. If I want to cry, I will do so. What society makes up is an illusion anyway. It's just a set of beliefs that are generally accepted. They're not facts.

I really see no value in all that. And what Hollywood tells you is a complete distortion of reality.

Make up your own mind. Don't ever let anyone tell you what you should be like unless you agree with them.

DG0409

Somebody posted this link on SR a while back and I really liked it. How to Be a Man

Actually, I thought a lot of them could apply to women as well.

jdooner

Thanks Jeff…I think I was breaking down the stereotypes and highlighting the embedded flaws of the status quo. I think for some though it creates a challenge based on beliefs or how they were raised. This creates a challenge for some.