How many "day 1"s did you have before it stuck?
Member
Join Date: Mar 2005
Posts: 1,947
Cheeky1.....do you really want to quit? Now?
I remember someone asked me that once and it pissed me off. And I realized I didn't want to quit.
I hope you can quit soon...like now....and do it! What's holding you back?
I remember someone asked me that once and it pissed me off. And I realized I didn't want to quit.
I hope you can quit soon...like now....and do it! What's holding you back?
Member
Join Date: Mar 2013
Posts: 1,171
What helped me was writing a letter to myself during one of my worst-ever hangovers. Underlined in bold letters was REMEMBER THIS FEELING. The pounding head, the dry throat, the sandpaper tongue, the bile in my stomach, the dread of not remembering what I did. Oh my God, I miss it not at all.
Go immediately to the hangover, shame, and regret when you think of taking a drink. And remember that the urge to drink goes away whether you drink or not. So why drink?
Go immediately to the hangover, shame, and regret when you think of taking a drink. And remember that the urge to drink goes away whether you drink or not. So why drink?
Member
Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: Melbourne, Victoria Australia
Posts: 1,202
Hi Cheeky,
I reckon I must be in the camp populated by bods like Joyous (earlier post). This year, in complete contrast to last year, I've had more slips and relapses and therefore Day 1's. Only in this past month or so, I've drunk 4 separate times, with a two week or so period of sobriety in between, like friggin' clockwork. I'm drinking now....after trying for the nth Day 1 and having gone to an early afternoon AA meeting.
It's a very mysterious illness, this one. And yet, I 'know' huge amounts ABOUT it, from my own reading, SR, rehabs, blah blah.
I reckon I must be in the camp populated by bods like Joyous (earlier post). This year, in complete contrast to last year, I've had more slips and relapses and therefore Day 1's. Only in this past month or so, I've drunk 4 separate times, with a two week or so period of sobriety in between, like friggin' clockwork. I'm drinking now....after trying for the nth Day 1 and having gone to an early afternoon AA meeting.
It's a very mysterious illness, this one. And yet, I 'know' huge amounts ABOUT it, from my own reading, SR, rehabs, blah blah.
All I can say is: it helps ME (i.e. only my experience) these days to try to consciously investigate why I've drunk. Even if there APPEARS to be 'no reason' of the more obvious sort - e.g. life crisis, feeling depressed, feeling elated, under pressure of stressors, etc etc - there is always something underlying which somehow overwhelms me to the point that I just go and get some booze. Sometimes, many times, I've poured most of it out after starting. Other times, I keep on going.
Yet, even yet, having said all that: I find it really important to at least be honest with myself, and also to tell others rather than hiding away out of shame / self remorse / guilt / and so on. Some might say that we should not 'sugar coat' our drinking slips / relapses. No, we should not, I agree entirely. However, for me, it helps me to stop again sooner rather than later if / when I have picked up if I at least reflect upon what's happening.
A great deal of SR - and indeed other sources of support - provide us with this opening to 'share' this experience and learning.
Yet, even yet, having said all that: I find it really important to at least be honest with myself, and also to tell others rather than hiding away out of shame / self remorse / guilt / and so on. Some might say that we should not 'sugar coat' our drinking slips / relapses. No, we should not, I agree entirely. However, for me, it helps me to stop again sooner rather than later if / when I have picked up if I at least reflect upon what's happening.
A great deal of SR - and indeed other sources of support - provide us with this opening to 'share' this experience and learning.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: Australia
Posts: 11,351
Too many to count unfortunately ;( but thankfully i found SR .
Could NEVER have done it by myself , i tried , tried and tried some more , now I'm at 5 months xx
You can do this , if i can , anyone can .
Good luck xx
Could NEVER have done it by myself , i tried , tried and tried some more , now I'm at 5 months xx
You can do this , if i can , anyone can .
Good luck xx
Member
Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: Midwest, USA
Posts: 1,022
I had four or five ["day ones"] in that first year when I seriously started trying to quit. (I had been drinking for 20-25 years, daily drinking for closer to ten than five.) After about a year, I finally had one that stuck for more than a couple of months. I'm at around twenty-four weeks of sobriety now, so coming up on that half-year mark pretty fast now.
Part of it "sticking" finally was practice, plain and simple. I got better at getting better. And another part was embarrassment at one particular incident of extreme, off-the-rails wacky drunken behavior back in June. Also, a long-term relationship ended that might have gone better without the booze, causing me to rethink some things. And I hit a milestone in age, another push towards introspection.
Funny thing is, looking back on the last half-year, I don't see how my finances could have accommodated my drinking habit. So it all worked out pretty well, oddly enough, as I guess some things do when you look at them in retrospect.
My advice for people is, keep on trying. Even if you can only manage sobriety a month at a time without relapsing, you're setting the foundation for later success. And four weeks sober followed by a week of drinking is substantially less awful for you than five weeks of drinking. For most of us, life is like the frog climbing up the slimy well in that math problem from junior high school--you climb up two feet, then slip down one. Two steps forward, one step back. That's the nature of life.
Part of it "sticking" finally was practice, plain and simple. I got better at getting better. And another part was embarrassment at one particular incident of extreme, off-the-rails wacky drunken behavior back in June. Also, a long-term relationship ended that might have gone better without the booze, causing me to rethink some things. And I hit a milestone in age, another push towards introspection.
Funny thing is, looking back on the last half-year, I don't see how my finances could have accommodated my drinking habit. So it all worked out pretty well, oddly enough, as I guess some things do when you look at them in retrospect.
My advice for people is, keep on trying. Even if you can only manage sobriety a month at a time without relapsing, you're setting the foundation for later success. And four weeks sober followed by a week of drinking is substantially less awful for you than five weeks of drinking. For most of us, life is like the frog climbing up the slimy well in that math problem from junior high school--you climb up two feet, then slip down one. Two steps forward, one step back. That's the nature of life.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2013
Location: Jersey
Posts: 65
Way too many to count. If I had to guess, I'd have to say easily over 200. It would be easy to say that many weren't serious attempts but I know better. I've spent many days asking myself how did that happen again and promising I would stop or at least slow down the train. Then a couple of hours would pass and I would hear something else. This voice sounded reasonable and told me just a couple, there's no harm in that and the like. A short time after that I would be pounding beers, again. A few hours after that I had a considerable beer can graveyard. The next day it would start all over again.
We've all been there so don't beat yourself up! I agree with Dee and the many others that say that the important thing is we try again. Eventually we can get it right! There are many examples of that here at SR and I thank them from the bottom of my heart for hanging around to help the newcomers like you and I.
We've all been there so don't beat yourself up! I agree with Dee and the many others that say that the important thing is we try again. Eventually we can get it right! There are many examples of that here at SR and I thank them from the bottom of my heart for hanging around to help the newcomers like you and I.
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