bigsombrero

The topic came up the other day, a co-worker solved a problem and someone said "Nice work, I'll buy you a beer for that one!"

The woman politely replied "Make that a ROOT beer and we have a deal!" As soon as she said that, another colleague said "oh that's funny, I don't drink either", and they both shared a laugh. My ears perked up and I did a double-take! This seemed impossible to me. There are normal people in this world who don't drink? And I work with them? I quickly reminded myself that this was work....not AA or SR! So I quietly laughed and said "oh that's cool, yeah I don't drink either". I said this in a very casual, off-handed manner, much like someone would say "Oh, I'm a Yankees fan also".

And then life went on. The world didn't stop. Nobody asked why. Nobody thought it was weird. The conversation turned to discussing exercise and weight loss. I talked about some of my hiking treks over the summer. Others joined in and talked about travel, coffee, gym membership prices, family, and New Year's resolutions.

And that was it. We moved on and got back to work.

When your entire world revolves around alcohol, we often make the mistake of thinking that others' worlds do too. For people who wonder "but what will people at WORK think???" -- well, they will probably think nothing at all. Heck, some of your colleagues might also be non-drinkers.

digdug

I always find it funny that us alcoholics have the preconceived notion that everyone and their mother drinks. The whole world is drinking!

But the stats tell a different tale. Various studies and surveys always seem to come to the conclusion that around 50% of the population (sometimes a bit higher, sometimes a bit lower, depending on the study) did not have a drink in the past year. That's a LOT of people who don't drink. And they're not even recovering alcoholics like us. Most are just normal people who don't like to drink.

My mom hasn't had a drink in 10 years. She is not an alcoholic. She just don't like the way alcohol makes her feel. It's sometimes a hard concept for me to grasp as an alcoholic

LuLu13

I think it really depends on the industry in which you work. I work in a sales environment and everyone drinks. Heck, my boss walked out of his office at 2 on Friday and invited everyone to leave and go to a bar. That being said, it doesn't bother me as I have no desire. Sometimes people give me crap for not drinking and I always respond that I am too old for peer pressure. I never give an excuse since it is none of their business nor do I feel that I need to justify my not drinking.

There are many "normal" people that don't drink, my daughter being one of them...how did that happen??? LOL

360shoes

Some industries do have more drinkers than others but I always kind of knew that anyway. Beings I've worked in many. Sales..yep, many do. Worked at a restaurant and bar...yep..a ton there too. Worked in corporate office not in sales...not so many there.

I have drank and not drank in all of them at some point or another. In the end, I've found that really the only people who care about why I don't drink are either heavy drinkers themselves or just folks that are curious. The rest don't really care.

I've had the ones that just can't seem to figure me out and keep asking if I quit because I had to or wanted to and I've had the ones that just asked and said oh okay. And I've had those that never asked.

I've never really been one to sit and discuss my personal life with work people anyway so I don't care if they ask or don't ask. I answer whatever seems to be appropriate to whoever asks or I don't.

It's just great to know that life is pretty fabulous even if you don't drink. And there are millions of people who prove that. Ex drinkers or people who just don't drink.

It is nice to know that most people's lives don't revolve around alcohol. I'm happy about that. I'm also happy I'm one in that group now regardless of how I got in it.

Thanks for the nice reminder BigSombrero!

Anna

I love that story!

Our perspectives do change in recovery and we realize that not everyone drinks as much as we did.

DoubleDragons

I honestly think that a lot of the people who we perceive as "normal" drinkers really don't like the way alcohol makes them feel. They may order a drink to appear social or whatever, but they really don't like the buzzed feeling. I have never liked strong pain medication. My son had his wisdom teeth taken out, took one oxycontin prescribed by the doctor and never took any more. He absolutely hated the dopey, slow moving, out of it feeling.

The rest of us who love the way alcohol makes us feel, are just in various degrees of addiction to it, IMHO.

malcolmsloan

Excellent post, Bigsombrero, thank you for that. I'm really working on our perceptions and assumptions about alcohol and the drinking habits/patterns of others. I've been getting pretty riled up lately and just the site of a glass of wine in a movie will set me off. Your post helped me with this processing. Thanks.

azureseas

maybe some cultures drink more than others
I have spent time in England, Ireland & Australia and personally found they drink more than here in USA

sugarbear1

Could it be possible that those people are also in recovery?

I work with many non-drinkers, too. And then there are those who do party, but in that "normal" way!

DramaStudent

Don't forget Scotland, here drinking is our national pastime. I also notice back home in England there is a big booze culture. I live just outside of Edinburgh so New Years is usually so booze filled that I dont think I can even think about going to a party. I'm just too new to recovery to successfully manage it.

babybingo

DramaStudent I agree- and in Wales too it's a big hobby for many.

BeerTooth

I saw a coworker at the grocery store yesterday and she felt the need to explain that the bottle of wine she was holding was for a friend and not hers. I immediately judged her as a "sinner". (No not really) It was just a little awkward. I used to get a little embarrassed when I was carrying a 30 pack on a Wednesday night and run into someone I know. It dawned on me that normal drinkers don't get embarrassed or feel the need to explain it.