BigBobby

Been sober since mid July and been back at work since September. I was in a right state mentally and physically up until July. Liver readings were ALT 403 now it is down to ALT 16 (normal range).
In AA doing service now. My boss had been really supportive and aware I have been getting help.
Staff night out 20th December and other staff are questioning me if I will be drinking. When I say no they seem surprised and keep asking me why?
I also went out for a meal on Monday with my parents and they did not put pressure on me as they are aware of my issues. My Gran was also there and after she had a few tipples kept asking me when I was on lemonade. She then fell over and I had to pick her up (Just like the scene out of Mrs Doubtfire)!
Just really tired people asking me why I am not drinking. Should I be honest about my alcohol history or continue to use excuses for the rest of my life e.g I am driving etc??????? I am not tempted to drink just really tired of others asking me constantly why!

Dee74

Hi Big Bobby

It's up to you what you say. I find it really rude that people keep asking.
I just say 'no thanks I don't drink'. If they ask why, I say 'I dont like to drink'...or for old friends, 'I gave it up/I don't like what it does to me'.

The only people who give you trouble are more often than not big drinkers themselves.

The one time anyone gave me continued trouble, I did end up telling I was an alcoholic - he left me completely alone after that - I think he feared it might be catching

D

Anna

You could always tell them that they are rude to ask.

Congratulations on your recovery.

PurpleKnight

I know the dilemma well, been gearing my self up for our work xmas night in a few weeks time, had a few warm up social events for some practice last weekend, I went to an Ice Hockey game with some mates, it was a successful sober event.

Basically I'm going to stick with "I'm not drinking tonight", rather than get into the whole history etc etc, I guess at some point those that notice, hang on you now don't seem to drink ever then I'll open up to them a bit more in the future, but little do the majority know that "I'm not drinking tonight" will be every night from now on.

I guess it depends on what works for everyone, but it's good to think about these things and have a plan, prior to the event, rather than peer pressure maybe causing a slip and being caught off guard!

digdug

You owe no one an explanation. Your recovery is yours to share however you choose. But there are definitely those who push with the "why" question.

Personally, I just say, "I can't drink because of medical reasons." And it's the truth. No excuses. Because if I pick up again, I'll probably die. No one pushes back after that because they don't want to hear about medical stuff. Too much of a downer lol

Mags1

Hi BigBobby I too have been sober since July.

It's my first sober Christmas so new territory. I've decided I'm doing the driving so no questions asked why I'm not drinking.. It seems to be our culture in UK to get plenty of booze down us at Christmas or anytime for that matter.
I haven't told anyone about my drink problem except my immediate family and a couple of close friends.
I think people will stop asking you when they get used to you not drinking, we are the rarity in some cultures, some believe we can't have a good time without booze and it's the contrary.

Marcher13

BigBobby I think in the beginning we all face this dilemma, it's best dealt with by being pro-active. Decide what you are going to say, stick to it then change the topic by introducing general conversation. With the staff at work be ready for them, if they ask you say your answer then change the subject.

least

I like just stating your intentions and changing the subject. And if they keep pressing you, then tell them it's rude to keep questioning you. That ought to shut them up.

LindaLou

I told my pressuring co-worker that "I outgrew the need to drink". He looked at me, stunned. But at least it shut him up!

Tang

This topic comes up a lot. There are some very high pressure drink work environments. 'I can't drink for medical reasons' is a very good reasonable excuse. I have never gotten away with 'I don't drink.' I've seen this ostracize people from work cliqs. I've seen the worst of the worst work drink pressure. People in places of power coercing low level employees to drink heavily. It takes a strong soul to resist so much pressure. We must fight the good fight!