Introduction
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2013
Location: Fort Collins
Posts: 7
Introduction
What a crazy thing life can be. I often wonder how I ever got to this point. Anyway, more on that later. I have been having headaches lately (pretty extreme) and have been to the doctor twice (which is way abnormal for me). Hoping they will go away. Don't know if they are related.
Trying to get all my drinking under control. Abstinence is my policy for the last week and i plan to keep that rolling. Just need a new take on life. Hate feeling something has control over me and has for a long time. Think back to the first beer i ever drank when 11. Seems like i started struggling with alcohol in my teens and it has only gotten worse as i got older.
I am going to try to write everyday. I am hoping to find a pen-pal on here that i can use to motivate myself and that i can help along the way.
All the lessons i have learned will certainly help others. I just need to dig them out. To all, keep up the good work and remember it is much easier to smile at yourself in the mirror when you are sober and not hungover. So many countless days trying to escape the miserable after effects of alcohol.
Trying to get all my drinking under control. Abstinence is my policy for the last week and i plan to keep that rolling. Just need a new take on life. Hate feeling something has control over me and has for a long time. Think back to the first beer i ever drank when 11. Seems like i started struggling with alcohol in my teens and it has only gotten worse as i got older.
I am going to try to write everyday. I am hoping to find a pen-pal on here that i can use to motivate myself and that i can help along the way.
All the lessons i have learned will certainly help others. I just need to dig them out. To all, keep up the good work and remember it is much easier to smile at yourself in the mirror when you are sober and not hungover. So many countless days trying to escape the miserable after effects of alcohol.
to SR! We're glad you joined us. 
Member
Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: PA
Posts: 695
Welcome,
Although we can't give medical advice, I will share with you what happen to me and my headaches (the word head "ache" doesn't adequately describe the pain I had in my head) and it had nothing to do with hangovers but a lot to do with drinking.
My headaches started before I got sober but I always chalked them up to a hangover. Near my 1 year sober anniversary, I could barely stand the pain. My doctor ordered a series of blood tests. My vitamin & mineral levels were critically low, so bad in fact, that my chart was actually used in a doctor roundtable, as they rarely saw levels as low as mine in a non-chemo patient.
How did drinking do this? I drank all my calories, I rarely ate, and if I did it was not healthy food. I had to go to the doctor every day for shots and was eventually taught how to give myself my own injections. I am 5+ years sober and I still give myself an injection every 2 weeks and will have to for the rest of my life.
Maybe ask the doctor for a CBC with vitamin & mineral levels added.
Although we can't give medical advice, I will share with you what happen to me and my headaches (the word head "ache" doesn't adequately describe the pain I had in my head) and it had nothing to do with hangovers but a lot to do with drinking.
My headaches started before I got sober but I always chalked them up to a hangover. Near my 1 year sober anniversary, I could barely stand the pain. My doctor ordered a series of blood tests. My vitamin & mineral levels were critically low, so bad in fact, that my chart was actually used in a doctor roundtable, as they rarely saw levels as low as mine in a non-chemo patient.
How did drinking do this? I drank all my calories, I rarely ate, and if I did it was not healthy food. I had to go to the doctor every day for shots and was eventually taught how to give myself my own injections. I am 5+ years sober and I still give myself an injection every 2 weeks and will have to for the rest of my life.
Maybe ask the doctor for a CBC with vitamin & mineral levels added.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,426
welcome Redemption19 
you'll find a ton of friends here - why not join our Class of November thread for everyone quitting this month:
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...art-2-a-6.html
Hope you find a solution to your headaches
D
you'll find a ton of friends here - why not join our Class of November thread for everyone quitting this month:
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...art-2-a-6.html
Hope you find a solution to your headaches
D
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2013
Location: Fort Collins
Posts: 7
Refreshing to see all of you on here. Inspirational, uplifting, surreal (but the unknown scares me). I plan to take myself on a journey from the first time I decided to have a drink of beer up through the present beer drinking, shot pounding, cigarette smoking days I call my life.
Just focusing on the highlights that I remember. Many of them will be sober moments where I sat wondering about the unknown. Those "what the hell did I do last night moments" that I have chartered so many times. The morning calls to friends, the tip-toe down the stairs to face reality, the anxiety of embarrassment, on and on and on and on. I planned to do start tonight but I have something else I would rather share.
Posting it in a minute but just wanted to say thanks!
Just focusing on the highlights that I remember. Many of them will be sober moments where I sat wondering about the unknown. Those "what the hell did I do last night moments" that I have chartered so many times. The morning calls to friends, the tip-toe down the stairs to face reality, the anxiety of embarrassment, on and on and on and on. I planned to do start tonight but I have something else I would rather share.
Posting it in a minute but just wanted to say thanks!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2013
Location: Fort Collins
Posts: 7
Room Full Of People
Throughout many years I have stood in a room full of people. Usually such a good actor. Chatting it up with other parents. Smiling on the outside but screaming holy **** on the inside. Shades on, starring around the room or the game field or wherever. Investigating the faces around me with one thought on my mind; is anyone here as hungover as I am? Not always but many, many times. Heart pounding, aches and pains, fogginess . . . it passes but I always wonder-- who got as trashed as I did last night? Many times I think to myself that 95% of the people in a room would be in an ambulance if they did what I did last night. Not proud of it. Not wearing some badge of honor (more on that during the story of my life). Just pondering the landscape and wondering if I am alone. Maybe there is one other in the setting but not many. It takes years for grooming to pull that off.
Today I left my office and headed to my daughter's school. I walked in there like I have so many times over the past decade. I know everyone and they know me. So many times i have not been hungover but so many times i have. Today i wasn't even remotely dealing with the effects of alcohol on my mind. I still felt a bit horrendous because of the pain in my damn head but I didn't look around the room to see if I could spot the "other person". I watched my youngest daughter (she is five) in her TG Day play and it made me miss her so much. She really is a beautiful person. I haven't spent anywhere near enough time with her. Don't get me wrong. I am around but alcohol is a huge distraction and a major killer of quality. I know I cannot get the missed opportunities back but I pray that I am strong enough to make the future count. I know that I am but I also have realized how STRONG and Determined alcohol is. Like all other drugs except alcohol has some glamour (so long as your not falling down drunk - lol).
Anyway, I leave you with this. In today's Room Full Of People I spent my time admiring one of the most important things in my life rather than scanning the turf to see if anyone was as beat down as me. I hope that the next time you are in a Room Full Of People you are able to focus on your purpose rather than the aftermath of a binge. Stay strong, be healthy and do something. It doesn't have to be perfect and it doesn't have to be pretty but one little change can make a difference. I don't know if it can be too late to change but I do know that I want to be known for trying. While nobody knows my struggles they occupy a great part of my day, my thoughts and my existence.
I hope I am on the road to the real me. The weekend is looming. I hope I dance through it without any remorse. Chat soon and hang in there. WE can help one another build a better life, gain control and succeed. Redemption is why I am here.
Today I left my office and headed to my daughter's school. I walked in there like I have so many times over the past decade. I know everyone and they know me. So many times i have not been hungover but so many times i have. Today i wasn't even remotely dealing with the effects of alcohol on my mind. I still felt a bit horrendous because of the pain in my damn head but I didn't look around the room to see if I could spot the "other person". I watched my youngest daughter (she is five) in her TG Day play and it made me miss her so much. She really is a beautiful person. I haven't spent anywhere near enough time with her. Don't get me wrong. I am around but alcohol is a huge distraction and a major killer of quality. I know I cannot get the missed opportunities back but I pray that I am strong enough to make the future count. I know that I am but I also have realized how STRONG and Determined alcohol is. Like all other drugs except alcohol has some glamour (so long as your not falling down drunk - lol).
Anyway, I leave you with this. In today's Room Full Of People I spent my time admiring one of the most important things in my life rather than scanning the turf to see if anyone was as beat down as me. I hope that the next time you are in a Room Full Of People you are able to focus on your purpose rather than the aftermath of a binge. Stay strong, be healthy and do something. It doesn't have to be perfect and it doesn't have to be pretty but one little change can make a difference. I don't know if it can be too late to change but I do know that I want to be known for trying. While nobody knows my struggles they occupy a great part of my day, my thoughts and my existence.
I hope I am on the road to the real me. The weekend is looming. I hope I dance through it without any remorse. Chat soon and hang in there. WE can help one another build a better life, gain control and succeed. Redemption is why I am here.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2013
Location: Fort Collins
Posts: 7
Good morning,
Hope everyone is starting their day on the right foot with a positive outlook on life. Freaky Friday. I have already made up my mind that I won't be touching alcohol today. Why? Because I want to feel GOOD tomorrow. I have a list of things that need some "checking off".
Remember this today. You're not perfect, you're never going to be perfect and all those people out there that think they're perfect, well, they're not perfect either. All of us have experiences that are lessons. Maybe you have already learned the lessons that others will need to learn tomorrow and vice-a-verse. I know drugs and alcohol occupy the mind and that it can be near impossible to shutoff. Just fight the fight.
Sometimes when you are going through HELL you just need to keep going!
Have a great day regardless of how you are waking up. Change can happen on any day, at any time.
~Redemption
Hope everyone is starting their day on the right foot with a positive outlook on life. Freaky Friday. I have already made up my mind that I won't be touching alcohol today. Why? Because I want to feel GOOD tomorrow. I have a list of things that need some "checking off".
Remember this today. You're not perfect, you're never going to be perfect and all those people out there that think they're perfect, well, they're not perfect either. All of us have experiences that are lessons. Maybe you have already learned the lessons that others will need to learn tomorrow and vice-a-verse. I know drugs and alcohol occupy the mind and that it can be near impossible to shutoff. Just fight the fight.
Sometimes when you are going through HELL you just need to keep going!
Have a great day regardless of how you are waking up. Change can happen on any day, at any time.
~Redemption
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2013
Location: Fort Collins
Posts: 7
Hello there. I hope you are all having a nice start to the week. Making progress is progress. Remember you only live once but if you do it right then once is enough. Let's make this one count!
Member
Join Date: Nov 2013
Location: against the grain
Posts: 746
I like your posts, Redemption. I have very similar feelings about being at my kids' school, at their games, and events. For a long time, I felt like I am the f@#$ed up one and everyone else had it together. When I got here, on SR, I suddenly did not feel so alone. This online community has pulled me throught he first 5 days, and that's all I can ask. Stay strong. You have some great insights. Thanks
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2013
Location: Fort Collins
Posts: 7
Good morning. Support to all of you today. I am going to read some posts throughout the day today to keep me motivated. Each night before leaving work I am going to try to read a little stuff regarding struggles from this site. It seems to make me stronger. I always think to myself "hey, you took the words right out of my mouth". So strange that there are so many people out there with the same thoughts about alcohol, drugs, life, family, self-worth, etc. You always think you are "the only one". Not so.
You miss 100 percent of the shots you don't take. If you can perceive something then you can achieve it. Today let's perceive an easy day without a lot of stress and struggle. Imagine yourself getting on in life try to put down the thoughts of alcohol-- just for a day. Tomorrow we will wake up happier and one day healthier. Just give it a shot and maybe you will score.
Wishing all of you a great day no matter where you are in this crazy process! More later.
You miss 100 percent of the shots you don't take. If you can perceive something then you can achieve it. Today let's perceive an easy day without a lot of stress and struggle. Imagine yourself getting on in life try to put down the thoughts of alcohol-- just for a day. Tomorrow we will wake up happier and one day healthier. Just give it a shot and maybe you will score.
Wishing all of you a great day no matter where you are in this crazy process! More later.
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