landminesgirl

Hey all! I doubt anyone will remember me, but I've been a "member" of this forum for quite some time (few years, I think). I haven't posted in a long time, but I lurk every so often. I'm a 38-year-old WAHM of 2 (5 & 3) and have been "overindulging" for about 20 years. I've cut back dramatically over the past 3 years, which has lessened the fights with my husband, and has given me more energy and increased self-esteem. But I haven't cut it out entirely, which I'm hoping to do. Someone on the outside might ask why I am concerned about cutting it out entirely when I have "learned" to cut back to a more respectable level.....here's why:

I'm an alcoholic - there's no denying that now. I think about alcohol ALL THE TIME. I count the moments until I can have my next drink. These days, it's 2 nights a week, and maybe only 2-3 glasses each time. (DRASTIC change from the 2 bottles over the course of 5-6 hours I was consuming 3 years ago.) Monday seem impossibly far away from Saturday. I'm training for a marathon and have my long runs on Saturday mornings, which has helped me say no on Friday nights. But Saturday rolls around, and all I think about is when I can uncork that bottle of wine.

I also imbibe on Sundays, usually a bit more - maybe 3-4 glasses of wine throughout the entire day. More if football is on.....

Some may not think that's a lot, but for an alcoholic like me, any amount is too much. I want to STOP THINKING ABOUT IT ALL THE DARN TIME. Imagine what I could accomplish if I didn't have wine on the brain all day.

Anyway, just wanted to say hi....I'm back. I need accountability, I need support. I remember this place having a bunch of both. Thanks!

Skye2

(back)

pinkdog

Hi girl, welcome back! I agree, it's not the amount of alcohol, it's the thinking about it and craving it and planning your life around it. However, the amount will increase. That's why I quit, the progressive nature of it. More and more. Take steps to quit. Then you can get rid of the guilt and the constant want. The best tool is to remember how you felt the last time you drank. And choose not to feel that way again. You can do this. We are on your side.

apophylite

Welcome back!

neferkamichael

Landminesgirl, back. Rootin for ya.

hayley86

Welcome back, there is lots of support here.

Avra

Welcome back!

feeling-good

Hi - I remember you!! I joined SR some time back as well. Well, this year I have finally, finally got sober. My 'method' was not one I would advocate or advise, but I can say that I don't crave alcohol or think about it or plan round it or anything like that at all now - a big, big change. Today (or possibly tomorrow) marks 10 months sobriety for me.

Anyway, a big welcome back!!!

Toffee1

It became pretty consuming for me also. I was a binge drinker rather than a regular drinker mainly Friday and Saturday nights. But like you I thought about it a lot more. The days seemed to drag along until the weekend and then I would spend 3 days getting over it. I am not yet over it but at 67 days I can say that I think less about alcohol as each day passes. Sometimes it is a couple of days before I realise I haven't thought about it. The cravings also diminish in terms of severity and occurrence.

In a nutshell I am saying that it gets easier as time goes by , you just have to be patient and let time pass by. Best of luck