back on day 1
Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: C.C. Ma.
Posts: 3,697
Hi. Some of us suffer better than others and think the escape of drinking is worth it. I was one of those until I got sick and tired of being sick and tired and simply surrender by following some needed directions, which I hated. One that helped me hugely was the fact that if I didn't pick up the first drink, I would not have to get sober AGAIN.
BE WELL
BE WELL
Member
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: Atlanta
Posts: 2,872
Keep it fresh in your mind, how you feel now, next time you feel like drinking. It works well for me. The misery, remorse and anxiety. I know it well because I had a hundred day ones.
It took me a long time of drinking to become an alcoholic. It took me a long time to un-learn the behaviors that made me drink to excess.
Don't be too hard on yourself. I've been there, too, so you're not alone.
If you devote the time you spend drinking and recovering into not drinking, you can't go wrong.
Best to you.
It took me a long time of drinking to become an alcoholic. It took me a long time to un-learn the behaviors that made me drink to excess.
Don't be too hard on yourself. I've been there, too, so you're not alone.
If you devote the time you spend drinking and recovering into not drinking, you can't go wrong.
Best to you.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: NE Wisconsin USA
Posts: 6,223
You are back here posting and that's a good thing...you see the benefits...and know what has worked for you....just never give up...you surely can live a contented and sober life like myself and so many others.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: Daytona Beach, FL
Posts: 425
Been there - honestly that feeling is more of a sobriety motivator than my program, sponsor, etc combined. I relapsed a couple of times - and now I have absolutely no desire to "get high" (alcohol, drugs, etc) because I KNOW how I will feel afterwards. Just never a good time. We do that though - keep trying to get back to where it is "fun" never will be. Hang in there - don't focus on the number so much as your evolving change in attitude towards drinking -
Kaleidoscope eyes
Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: London
Posts: 5,243
You will get there. Relapse is normal and just a learning curve - nothing to feel bad about. It just reaffirms a determination. It might even happen again, but if you want it to stop, one day it will. Something will just click. xx
Member
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: State of Acceptance
Posts: 756
Hi Teardrop! So glad you are back!!! Just don't stop trying. Don't give up. Eventually you will get it. You will see the beast for what it really is. Always remember, nothing good ever comes from it.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2013
Posts: 11,423
[I just posted this message on your other thread, but thought I'd copy it here with some editing in case you've moved on from that one:]
Hi teardrop;
I'm glad your back. I relapsed many times. But just one day is more a blip than a relapse. It is great that you kept safe.
Recovery is hard but now that I have more sober time than drunk time these past two years,
I would have to say that my life is much better, my depression and anger are largely gone, and my family life is much more stable.
It is clear from your other posts that these are also things you want in your life and I believe you can have them.
We all do, and we are all doing our best to get there and to help each other to get there.
That's why this site "works" I think--There is no BS since we've been there too and understand how fecking hard it can be to not pick up sometimes.
It's OK, don't beat yourself up, and think about what you can do differently next time.
Hi teardrop;
I'm glad your back. I relapsed many times. But just one day is more a blip than a relapse. It is great that you kept safe.
Recovery is hard but now that I have more sober time than drunk time these past two years,
I would have to say that my life is much better, my depression and anger are largely gone, and my family life is much more stable.
It is clear from your other posts that these are also things you want in your life and I believe you can have them.
We all do, and we are all doing our best to get there and to help each other to get there.
That's why this site "works" I think--There is no BS since we've been there too and understand how fecking hard it can be to not pick up sometimes.
It's OK, don't beat yourself up, and think about what you can do differently next time.
AA member
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: United Kingdom.
Posts: 3,007
Originally Posted by KateL 
You will get there. Relapse is normal and just a learning curve - nothing to feel bad about. It just reaffirms a determination. It might even happen again, but if you want it to stop, one day it will. Something will just click. xx
Teardrop sorry to hear you are struggling.You have to want to remain sober more than you want to drink.The longer you carry on drinking the worse it will get and the day may come when you can't stay sober.
Have you got a plan this time,?you need to be doing something different from before.
Wish you well and stay away from the first drink.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2010
Location: united kingdom
Posts: 201
Originally Posted by heath480
Relapse is not normal,a dangerous way to think for an Alcoholic.Giving yourself the excuse to drink again.
Teardrop sorry to hear you are struggling.You have to want to remain sober more than you want to drink.The longer you carry on drinking the worse it will get and the day may come when you can't stay sober.
Have you got a plan this time,?you need to be doing something different from before.
Wish you well and stay away from the first drink.
Teardrop sorry to hear you are struggling.You have to want to remain sober more than you want to drink.The longer you carry on drinking the worse it will get and the day may come when you can't stay sober.
Have you got a plan this time,?you need to be doing something different from before.
Wish you well and stay away from the first drink.
my ocd is in my everyday life, and it bothers me, it gets in the way of my everyday life, im not saying drink is the answer but i dont know what else to do when i get in that state, apart from self medicate
if only i could clearly remember this feeling now, i feel sick ill and had a awful morning and had lots of appolagising to do
Its a cold and its a broken hallelujah.
Join Date: Aug 2011
Posts: 2,887
Awe, Teardrop. I'm so sorry you having such a rough go at it.
I know how difficult it can be when your brain feels like it's sabotaging you at every turn. Please, PLEASE, understand though that the alcohol, while a temporary salve, exacerbates all that awfulness that you are feeling. Tenfold.
The only way around this is through.
You had some sober time under your belt. That is time for your brain and body to heal. There is a phenomena in alcoholism called "kindling". Long story short, it makes every slips consequences, worse. Almost like our brain finally gets the fact that we are poisoning it and just to give us an ass whooping, it makes us sicker and sicker with every drink.
You can do this. You are better than you think you are right now.
Settle down and settle in.
You are so worth it.
XO AO
I know how difficult it can be when your brain feels like it's sabotaging you at every turn. Please, PLEASE, understand though that the alcohol, while a temporary salve, exacerbates all that awfulness that you are feeling. Tenfold.
The only way around this is through.
You had some sober time under your belt. That is time for your brain and body to heal. There is a phenomena in alcoholism called "kindling". Long story short, it makes every slips consequences, worse. Almost like our brain finally gets the fact that we are poisoning it and just to give us an ass whooping, it makes us sicker and sicker with every drink.
You can do this. You are better than you think you are right now.
Settle down and settle in.
You are so worth it.
XO AO
Member
Join Date: May 2013
Location: North East, US
Posts: 2,310
You're still here and so are we
My little brother suffers terribly from OCD. It's actually not such a horrible diagnosis if you can harness and channel your strengths. The OCD mind is brilliant it's sharp it astoot. you need to find something healthy to direct the round and around thinking. My little brother uses music. He puts his obsessive thinking into writing music.
My little brother suffers terribly from OCD. It's actually not such a horrible diagnosis if you can harness and channel your strengths. The OCD mind is brilliant it's sharp it astoot. you need to find something healthy to direct the round and around thinking. My little brother uses music. He puts his obsessive thinking into writing music.
Sober since March 21, 2013
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: Houston, Texas
Posts: 262
Hey teardrop.
Glad you made it back in almost one piece.
The more my body and mind heals from decades of excessive drinking the more I realize how much of the fear, anxiety, and depression was caused by alcohol.
Many negative feelings I have lived with my entire life have diminished or are completely gone.
Nothing is worse for OCD than a hangover.
Good luck, and keep posting.
Glad you made it back in almost one piece.
The more my body and mind heals from decades of excessive drinking the more I realize how much of the fear, anxiety, and depression was caused by alcohol.
Many negative feelings I have lived with my entire life have diminished or are completely gone.
Nothing is worse for OCD than a hangover.
Good luck, and keep posting.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: Seattle, WA
Posts: 2,443
Originally Posted by teardrop
after a terrible night/evening of drinking
i cant seem to get off this roundabout of hell
i cant seem to get off this roundabout of hell
The old and well used 'one day at a time' really does work.
Just one day.
At a time.
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