A drunk of a different color
A simple guy making his way
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Maine
Posts: 7,867
A drunk of a different color
There seems to be classes within this drunk caste. I never accepted myself to be of the lowest. But I knew when I saw a lower class drunk than myself. I felt for them with pity and released myself of guilt for the judgement with a sense of righteousness. Telling myself I know what it's like so it's ok to judge.
I bumped into a friend Bill the other day. The short but stark conversation stayed with me enough that I have been unsettled since.
Bill was the drunk I used to judge. That kind of drunk that lost it all. Very often had bruises on his face from falling on the street. Gets arrested a lot for being drunk in public. Sleeps at the shelter.
But none of those things were the reason I judged.
Bill was also someone who I have let stay at my place. Shower and have a good meal. Spend time talking about everything and nothing. I considered him a friend. Someone I found interesting and for all of the outside appearances was astute and very self aware.
I have been away from this place now for 5 years. Just moved back. Bill is sober 3 years now. Back being a master carpenter doing finish work at a high level. He was always talented that way. Lives and helps run a sober house he founded. And supports so many of the homeless drunk men that seem to land here.
He still looks rough these days from a life lived outside but the character he exudes is the same as it was when I judged him to be of a class he never did belong to. I put it on him. On me.
I learned a lot from Bill over the years. Not only by him but by myself trying to understand him. In turn understanding a little bit more of me.
Not especially happy with myself for these judgements. But I go lighter these days on me and others. Drunks that seem to be lost.
Every single one of us can recover. Those with less .... and those with more. More what? More money? More access to resources?
Nope.... More character that we all have deep down. Not one of us need be left behind by any caste system... Any judgements made out of pity.
Don't pity any drunk. Don't pity yourself. Pick yourself up. Be inspired by the perceived lesser. I guarantee you walk away with more. Be humble in this walk. I know I will be. I know I am.
K
I bumped into a friend Bill the other day. The short but stark conversation stayed with me enough that I have been unsettled since.
Bill was the drunk I used to judge. That kind of drunk that lost it all. Very often had bruises on his face from falling on the street. Gets arrested a lot for being drunk in public. Sleeps at the shelter.
But none of those things were the reason I judged.
Bill was also someone who I have let stay at my place. Shower and have a good meal. Spend time talking about everything and nothing. I considered him a friend. Someone I found interesting and for all of the outside appearances was astute and very self aware.
I have been away from this place now for 5 years. Just moved back. Bill is sober 3 years now. Back being a master carpenter doing finish work at a high level. He was always talented that way. Lives and helps run a sober house he founded. And supports so many of the homeless drunk men that seem to land here.
He still looks rough these days from a life lived outside but the character he exudes is the same as it was when I judged him to be of a class he never did belong to. I put it on him. On me.
I learned a lot from Bill over the years. Not only by him but by myself trying to understand him. In turn understanding a little bit more of me.
Not especially happy with myself for these judgements. But I go lighter these days on me and others. Drunks that seem to be lost.
Every single one of us can recover. Those with less .... and those with more. More what? More money? More access to resources?
Nope.... More character that we all have deep down. Not one of us need be left behind by any caste system... Any judgements made out of pity.
Don't pity any drunk. Don't pity yourself. Pick yourself up. Be inspired by the perceived lesser. I guarantee you walk away with more. Be humble in this walk. I know I will be. I know I am.
K
Realising my life
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: Dorset, England
Posts: 3,656
Beautiful post, Weasel. Reading this gave me a lovely warm glow 
One of the most brilliant things in life, for me, is that we never stop learning. There is always more to find out about ourselves and each other. And sometimes, the more you find out, the more you realise that we are all part of the same humanity.
I love your posts, Weasel. They help me to grow.
One of the most brilliant things in life, for me, is that we never stop learning. There is always more to find out about ourselves and each other. And sometimes, the more you find out, the more you realise that we are all part of the same humanity. I love your posts, Weasel. They help me to grow.
That bell or bike person
Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: london
Posts: 4,978
I know people who are vastly rich & i know people who are church mouse poor on this path of recovery ..
Seems to me we share in common with each other far more when we are walking the right path than any differences .
m
Seems to me we share in common with each other far more when we are walking the right path than any differences .
m
Its a cold and its a broken hallelujah.
Join Date: Aug 2011
Posts: 2,887
(((Weasel)))). This is so beautiful.
I read once, the only time it's ok to look down on somebody is when you are reaching down to help lift them back up.
Have a deliciously sober Sunday.
Blessings.
I read once, the only time it's ok to look down on somebody is when you are reaching down to help lift them back up.
Have a deliciously sober Sunday.
Blessings.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2013
Posts: 2,805
Originally Posted by alphaomega 
(((Weasel)))). This is so beautiful.
I read once, the only time it's ok to look down on somebody is when you are reaching down to help lift them back up.
Have a deliciously sober Sunday.
Blessings.
I read once, the only time it's ok to look down on somebody is when you are reaching down to help lift them back up.
Have a deliciously sober Sunday.
Blessings.
voices ca**y
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: St. Paul Minnesota
Posts: 4,359
Awesome post once again Weasel. I have been thinking about this lately myself. The ridiculous ways we use to measure people so we can make them fit into some construct of our mind. How much of what who we think someone is is actually them and not us reflected?
A simple guy making his way
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Maine
Posts: 7,867
I wonder that if I was not a drunk would I still feel. See?
It's an absolute .... We are never given more than we can handle.
I hold on to that. It saves me.
Looking forward to work tomorrow... Yeah! Cannot wait.
It's an absolute .... We are never given more than we can handle.
I hold on to that. It saves me.
Looking forward to work tomorrow... Yeah! Cannot wait.
That bell or bike person
Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: london
Posts: 4,978
Originally Posted by Weasel1966
It's an absolute .... We are never given more than we can handle.
There is always relief when i go to sleep and the next day gives one a chance to do something different .
m
Member
Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: Seattle, WA
Posts: 2,443
Originally Posted by Weasel1966
I wonder that if I was not a drunk would I still feel.
And if I were not a drunk, I would definitely have less patience, less compassion, less empathy. It is a life lesson.
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