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Go to Meeting #2? Feel like giving up

Old 11-16-2013, 01:43 PM
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Lightbulb Go to Meeting #2? Feel like giving up

What a con I am - I'm trying to convince myself after a whole second day without drinking that I don't need to go to NA tonight...
I'm scared to go to an open meeting.
Last night, I could hardly contain myself, I just burst into tears. When I was asked to speak, all I could get out through cries is.. "My family doesn't want me anymore"... And well, they still don't.

I woke up with hope and now, I have such a bad headache, and I'm so tempted to just have one drink...

Help... Anyone... I need to get out of this spot. Please.
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Old 11-16-2013, 01:50 PM
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Your not going to have a drink - you can do this
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Old 11-16-2013, 01:53 PM
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I am trying. I am praying hard and trying. I don't want to throw this away!!
I want this. I need this!!!

Is it normal to be sweating like crazy JSMUK?
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Old 11-16-2013, 01:56 PM
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Pada, is your drug of choice alcohol?

Im 17 days sober today and sweat a lot when I first quit. It took... maybe a full two weeks to have that subside noticeably for me. The worst was at night... couldn't sleep, bad night sweats.
If I were you, I'd check online to see what types of meetings are going on tonight. Based on descriptions it's easy to pick meetings where you don't have to participate much. Also, you can always say "I'm going to pass tonight." or something along those lines if you do not want to share. I just did that the other day.

Good luck, stay strong!
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Old 11-16-2013, 01:56 PM
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Just sit tight here - your amongst friends now
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Old 11-16-2013, 02:01 PM
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Early recovery is really rough - it's hard and scary...especially when we realise just how much we'll have to do to turn our lives around....but we can do it, bit by bit and day by day.

It's not beyond you, and you're not alone

Go to your meeting if you can - you'll find support there...and you'll find it here too

keep posting.
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Old 11-16-2013, 02:11 PM
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Drinking never helped me to change the fundamental circumstances of my life, i just ended a victim of it , padawanoxo .
Staying sober, going to meetings and staying close to others working their recovery empowers you to make positive changes,

Bestwishes, m
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Old 11-16-2013, 02:13 PM
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Alcohol is what I abuse most, but I've been taking multiple things the last 2-3 weekends.

THank you all for your words, my spirit feels better. I'm going to just wait it out... And just try and keep reading this over and over before my meeting starts.

Thank you Chai, I will take your advice and pass on speaking tonight. I just need to hear that this is gonna stop.
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Old 11-16-2013, 02:27 PM
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Originally Posted by padawanxox View Post
Alcohol is what I abuse most, but I've been taking multiple things the last 2-3 weekends.

THank you all for your words, my spirit feels better. I'm going to just wait it out... And just try and keep reading this over and over before my meeting starts.

Thank you Chai, I will take your advice and pass on speaking tonight. I just need to hear that this is gonna stop.
Oh, it definitely will stop! Especially being timid to go to meetings- I was fearful at first but now I have a few I go to that I walk in with no problem. New ones still make me a little anxious though. Also, my favorite AA meetings are the speaker meetings. If you go onto the main AA website and search meetings, they will tell you if there is a speaker or not- typically the speaker meetings you don't have to talk, just listen
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Old 11-16-2013, 02:33 PM
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That's awesome!!
I'd love to just sit in soak in some knowledge.

This one is "open & discussion"
Nervous because it's open & a town over, but I need it more than anonymity right now.
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Old 11-16-2013, 02:36 PM
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Originally Posted by padawanxox View Post
That's awesome!!
I'd love to just sit in soak in some knowledge.

This one is "open & discussion"
Nervous because it's open & a town over, but I need it more than anonymity right now.
Definitely, that's why I love them! It's nice to sit and listen to others share what they've learned throughout their sobriety... and even some of their stories from when they were drinking to know a) you're not alone and b) if that person can get through it and be successful in recovery, so can you!

Yeah... I've been to some discussion ones where they've literally gone around the room asking for everyone to talk but without fail I've always seen a few people say "pass" or something along those lines. If you go early, you could even talk to whoever is facilitating and let them know you just want to observe (if you feel comfortable doing so).

Good luck! You can do it!
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Old 11-16-2013, 03:25 PM
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Give yourself more time to 'even out'. You'll start feeling better after a few weeks.
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Old 11-16-2013, 03:31 PM
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Hi padawanxox. Yes, it definitely gets easier and less intense. Otherwise most of us would never make it out of the fog. What you're feeling is normal and to be expected. Just keep walking forward - you can do this. We are with you.
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Old 11-16-2013, 03:46 PM
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Become willing to go there earlier, help them set up, leave later, help them put things away, or simply wash the coffee cups, you don't have to say a thing either.
But just get to a meeting at least. Many have been where you are at right now, it helps them to.
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Old 11-16-2013, 03:48 PM
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When you feel like not going, that's when you should go. Let everyone in that meeting know you're new. It's ok to cry.
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Old 11-16-2013, 06:49 PM
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Thank you guys all SO much!!
I went - And this meeting was VERY different from last night.

A lot more people in my their mid 20's and I even made a friend!!
She invited me to go to a meeting tomorrow in the morning & it's a speaker!!
So I'm excited for that experience.


Thank you all for pushing me... God knows I'll need it more than once
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