What defines an alcoholic?
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2013
Posts: 4
What defines an alcoholic?
Hi there,
I'm new to this forum, and I'd like to get an honest opinion on my condition - I believe it's a lot milder and not as debilitating as other cases, but I'd like to know if I should take heed of the signs and quit before it's too late.
I'm 27 this year, and like all of us here, do (or used to) enjoy my drink... a little too much! I used to drink only on the weekends, and have been religiously doing so for the past 10 years of my life. I could easily throw back 5 pints and a couple of whisky sours in a few hours.
These days, I notice that I am unable to enjoy myself/make conversation at social functions, even if it's just dinner with a couple of close girlfriends. I'd make sure I'll have perhaps two shots of whisky before meeting them, and try to ensure that I'll have 1-2 glasses of wine throughout the night to "sustain" my conversation flow. I work in the PR industry, so you can imagine how utterly useless I am without my alcohol!
On a daily basis, I find myself reaching out for the bottle even if I'm in the office (my office has a pro-drinking culture, ha). It's not a lot, but perhaps just one or two glasses of whisky with water just to get my engines going - it helps me write better.
In a nutshell, alcohol has now officially become an aid to me - it helps me talk to people, I become far wittier after drinking, my creativity soars and most importantly, my confidence gets pushed up as well.
Drinking timetable:
Mon: 2 x shots whisky, plus a glass of wine at night
Tues: 3 shots of whisky
Wed: Rest
Thurs: 4 glasses of wine
Fri: 10 shots equivalent of whisky
Sat: 6 pints of beer
Sun: Hangover
Of course it hasn't reached Hemingway levels yet, but I'm getting worried if it may affect my health in the future. I suffer from terrible hangovers, and I get alcohol-caused amnesia the morning after.
Thanks in advance for any advice given!
Lisa
I'm new to this forum, and I'd like to get an honest opinion on my condition - I believe it's a lot milder and not as debilitating as other cases, but I'd like to know if I should take heed of the signs and quit before it's too late.
I'm 27 this year, and like all of us here, do (or used to) enjoy my drink... a little too much! I used to drink only on the weekends, and have been religiously doing so for the past 10 years of my life. I could easily throw back 5 pints and a couple of whisky sours in a few hours.
These days, I notice that I am unable to enjoy myself/make conversation at social functions, even if it's just dinner with a couple of close girlfriends. I'd make sure I'll have perhaps two shots of whisky before meeting them, and try to ensure that I'll have 1-2 glasses of wine throughout the night to "sustain" my conversation flow. I work in the PR industry, so you can imagine how utterly useless I am without my alcohol!
On a daily basis, I find myself reaching out for the bottle even if I'm in the office (my office has a pro-drinking culture, ha). It's not a lot, but perhaps just one or two glasses of whisky with water just to get my engines going - it helps me write better.
In a nutshell, alcohol has now officially become an aid to me - it helps me talk to people, I become far wittier after drinking, my creativity soars and most importantly, my confidence gets pushed up as well.
Drinking timetable:
Mon: 2 x shots whisky, plus a glass of wine at night
Tues: 3 shots of whisky
Wed: Rest
Thurs: 4 glasses of wine
Fri: 10 shots equivalent of whisky
Sat: 6 pints of beer
Sun: Hangover
Of course it hasn't reached Hemingway levels yet, but I'm getting worried if it may affect my health in the future. I suffer from terrible hangovers, and I get alcohol-caused amnesia the morning after.
Thanks in advance for any advice given!
Lisa
Member
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: Strailya
Posts: 8,021
Hi Lisa
Welcome to SR. IMO, its not the quantity of alcohol but its how alcohol affects you. Do you have cravings for alcohol ? Are you able to stop after 1-2 drinks ? Do you have black outs ? One of the common AA tests is to try and drink only 2 drinks per night for 2 weeks. If you are not able to control, then you may have an issue with alcohol.
I recommend that you explore SR and read the threads to see if there are similarities with your story. Its good that you are concerned at an early age ! The reason being that if you do have an issue, you can arrest it and get on with a long and happy life !
Welcome to SR. IMO, its not the quantity of alcohol but its how alcohol affects you. Do you have cravings for alcohol ? Are you able to stop after 1-2 drinks ? Do you have black outs ? One of the common AA tests is to try and drink only 2 drinks per night for 2 weeks. If you are not able to control, then you may have an issue with alcohol.
I recommend that you explore SR and read the threads to see if there are similarities with your story. Its good that you are concerned at an early age ! The reason being that if you do have an issue, you can arrest it and get on with a long and happy life !
Member
Join Date: Dec 2009
Posts: 47
I am also (almost) 27. I didn't drink daily, I more had a binge once a week and then maybe a few through the week. I think this is part of the reason that some family members will not accept that I am an alcoholic. For me it was the way I felt after drinking. I would have black outs and the next day felt like hell. At first I thought I could stop simply because I wanted to, but everytime I did that it seemed my drinking would get worse... It was like once I said no more my body craved it more. I know I am an alcoholic, and these days I am ok with others disagreeing with me, but they have never had to be in my head after a bender 
I think if you are honest with yourself you will know your answer 
I think if you are honest with yourself you will know your answer Keeping it simple!
Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: Surrey, BC
Posts: 3,282
Originally Posted by notjanedoe11 
I'd like to get an honest opinion on my condition - I believe it's a lot milder and not as debilitating as other cases, but I'd like to know if I should take heed of the signs and quit before it's too late.
Some red flags that I see: thinking your problem is milder or not as bad as everyone eles. I told myself this so that i could justify why it was okay for me to keep drinking. I pretty well thought I was in a totally different classification than everyone else. Which meant really that I was better than everyone else (not saying that this is what you are saying, I'm just speaking for me)
Using alcohol as an aid is also a big red flag, god knows I used it that way for years.
Anytime alcohol causes you problems or you NEED it, I think you basically have a problem and should be aware. I didn't always have that much of a drinking problem in my younger years, but it caught up with me. Near the end I basically could not stop with one drink. Or one sip. If you have this disease it is progressive. It gets worse and worse and one day you look at yourself and can't figure out what the heck happened!
Like someone said keep posting and reading. There is so much info along with good people here and you will ALWAYS have our support no matter what you decide.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2013
Posts: 4
Hi everyone!
Thanks for the speedy responses. I really appreciate it!
I could easily go through the week on just two drinks a day - if I can drink it both neat at once so that I can get the buzz.. if you know what I mean! Basically I am unable to stop at the standard two drinks because my alcohol tolerence levels are pretty high even for a petite girl like me.
Would it be right to say that there isn't a standard model for defining alcoholism, and it's solely up to the person to decide if he/she has a problem?
If that's the case I may very well have a drinking problem because I don't see myself being functional at social functions or write creatively at all without it. Unfortunately there isn't a medication that could help me become a social butterfly or a creative maestro
Thanks for the speedy responses. I really appreciate it!
I could easily go through the week on just two drinks a day - if I can drink it both neat at once so that I can get the buzz.. if you know what I mean! Basically I am unable to stop at the standard two drinks because my alcohol tolerence levels are pretty high even for a petite girl like me.
Would it be right to say that there isn't a standard model for defining alcoholism, and it's solely up to the person to decide if he/she has a problem?
If that's the case I may very well have a drinking problem because I don't see myself being functional at social functions or write creatively at all without it. Unfortunately there isn't a medication that could help me become a social butterfly or a creative maestro
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,442
welcome notjanedoe11
I think the best analysis is always self analysis.
That said, things like not being able to stop once you start, inability to enjoy oneself or socially interact without alcohol, drinking at work to help the juices flow or whatever...regular hangovers and amnesia or blackouts...and a reasonably hefty weekly drinks intake, some binging and including the need for rest days...all those things are potential red flags to me based on my experience.
I think you have grounds for concern. The good news is the earlier you tackle this the easier, and the better, it will be
you'll find a lot of support here
D
I think the best analysis is always self analysis.
That said, things like not being able to stop once you start, inability to enjoy oneself or socially interact without alcohol, drinking at work to help the juices flow or whatever...regular hangovers and amnesia or blackouts...and a reasonably hefty weekly drinks intake, some binging and including the need for rest days...all those things are potential red flags to me based on my experience.
I think you have grounds for concern. The good news is the earlier you tackle this the easier, and the better, it will be
you'll find a lot of support here
D
Member
Join Date: Nov 2013
Posts: 10
I think if you have to ask, then its affecting you in ways you don't like. Labels or not, if you think its a problem then it probably is. I don't think you necessarily have to put a label on it to recognize its significance.
Guest
Join Date: Dec 2012
Posts: 7,097
Only you can diagnose you. We can help with info of course
When I was 27 my work was very intense and drinking was a key part of it-lunches out,functions after work, parties -we all drank, it seemed normal .Even then though I was aware my drinking wasn't 'normal' - I needed it for confidence, fun ,social interaction and couldn't properly function without it in social gatherings
It got worse. Fast forward ten years and I'd gone from the witty, attractive girl with a career on the up to a fatter,unattractive, bloated older looking woman with a red lined face and dead eyes. Whilst still working my career had definitely waned and I'd lost so many good relationships because of my drinking. What's funny and cute in your mid twenties is just an embarassing,shameful mess in your mid 30s.
I'm nearly 40 and I got sober last year. It was too late for me to turn theclock back .It's not too late for you. I read yourpost with so much pain and regret .I wish I had hadthe sense and foresight to stop drinking in my 20s to save myself a lot of pain ,heartache aging and money.
It's too late for me.It's not too late for you. If you are concerned about your drinking,think you have a problem and post on SR then you know you DO have a problem. It is a progressive problem and will get worse,physically and mentally.
Please don't compare yourself to others and think you don't have a problem because you're not 'that' bad. As I once read on here
"I didn't quit drinking because I'd lost everything I quit because I had everything to lose if I didn't"
When I was 27 my work was very intense and drinking was a key part of it-lunches out,functions after work, parties -we all drank, it seemed normal .Even then though I was aware my drinking wasn't 'normal' - I needed it for confidence, fun ,social interaction and couldn't properly function without it in social gatherings
It got worse. Fast forward ten years and I'd gone from the witty, attractive girl with a career on the up to a fatter,unattractive, bloated older looking woman with a red lined face and dead eyes. Whilst still working my career had definitely waned and I'd lost so many good relationships because of my drinking. What's funny and cute in your mid twenties is just an embarassing,shameful mess in your mid 30s.
I'm nearly 40 and I got sober last year. It was too late for me to turn theclock back .It's not too late for you. I read yourpost with so much pain and regret .I wish I had hadthe sense and foresight to stop drinking in my 20s to save myself a lot of pain ,heartache aging and money.
It's too late for me.It's not too late for you. If you are concerned about your drinking,think you have a problem and post on SR then you know you DO have a problem. It is a progressive problem and will get worse,physically and mentally.
Please don't compare yourself to others and think you don't have a problem because you're not 'that' bad. As I once read on here
"I didn't quit drinking because I'd lost everything I quit because I had everything to lose if I didn't"
lillyknitting
Join Date: May 2010
Location: Loughton, Essex, England
Posts: 638
I'm going to be really honest. I don't care if we use the word alcoholic. I looked at your timetable and thought I just couldn't stand it. I had that life, I was a binger, but it got worse. I spent half the week boozing, the other half trying to get over it. I don't give a s..t about work place, I don't care what others think, drink, do or say. It's your life. I chose I didn't want that terrible, horrible life any more. Get real. It's a killer. It will destroy your organs, it destroys the walls of the heart. Ask your doctor. It totally ruins your looks. Don't expect to look fresh faced, bright eyed and young for your age. It puts on weight. It bloats you out. It makes you look dreadful. It makes you feel even more dreadful. It causes rows, arguments, splits up relationships. Ruins marriages. Destroys children's lives. Etc. Good luck on your decision.
Guest
Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: Nottingham (UK)
Posts: 2,690
I personally don't use the word 'alcoholic' as by labelling things , it turns them into some kind of official thing which it would seem, people then bow to.
I prefer to think that I have ' a problem ' - problems can be solved
I prefer to think that I have ' a problem ' - problems can be solved
Keeping it simple!
Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: Surrey, BC
Posts: 3,282
Originally Posted by Skye2
I personally don't use the word 'alcoholic' as by labelling things , it turns them into some kind of official thing which it would seem, people then bow to.
I prefer to think that I have ' a problem ' - problems can be solved
I prefer to think that I have ' a problem ' - problems can be solved
Kaleidoscope eyes
Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: London
Posts: 5,243
It takes various shapes and forms but I knew, deep down, early on that I had a problem and my drinking was different to most of my peers. I kept changing the pattern, like cutting down, just bingeing at weekends or changing drinks etc. But none of that ever worked.
A Day at a Time
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Grand Rapids MI
Posts: 6,435
I think you know the answer. Now you have to admit it to yourself and do something about it.
The other possibility is to continue down the road you're on until you start losing things. Your job, your life, your freedom, relationships, your health, your self esteem and will to live. These are just some of the things you have to look forward to if you continue your relationship with alcohol
The other possibility is to continue down the road you're on until you start losing things. Your job, your life, your freedom, relationships, your health, your self esteem and will to live. These are just some of the things you have to look forward to if you continue your relationship with alcohol
Canine Welfare Advocate
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: Norfolk, VA
Posts: 10,962
Originally Posted by notjanedoe11
Would it be right to say that there isn't a standard model for defining alcoholism, and it's solely up to the person to decide if he/she has a problem?
(
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But in a lot of cases it's pretty obvious that someone is exhibiting alcoholic drinking. It's just a waste of breath trying to tell an alcoholic they are one.
Ultimately, it's up to the drinker to make the call...and catch up to what other people already know.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: Gatineau, QC, CA
Posts: 5,100
I agree with all others.
But my 50 Cents is that if you need a chemical in your life to fonction then it's probably an issue. We should only need water as a basic need to substain us.
Imagine getting stuck on an Island for months, would you miss the alchool?
But my 50 Cents is that if you need a chemical in your life to fonction then it's probably an issue. We should only need water as a basic need to substain us.
Imagine getting stuck on an Island for months, would you miss the alchool?
Better when never is never
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: Wisconsin near Twin Cities
Posts: 1,745
I only look at whether my drinking is causing problems in my life and whether I naturally adjust my drinking patterns to avoid those problems. I do not. I call myself an alcoholic, but only because alcohol addict sounds so clunky. However, I believe everyone can become addicted to alcohol if they drink enough of it for long enough.
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