How to help my sister who's getting outta rehab?
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2013
Location: Toronto, Canada
Posts: 43
How to help my sister who's getting outta rehab?
My sister is getting out of rehab in a few days and she'll come stay at my place 'till she feels stronger and get a job and her own place. I thought about telling her about this site and I know she's gonna get support from the people at her job cuz she started doing drugs cuz her job (she was working for the police as a double agent and she lost it and started doing drugs). I know they will keep helping her and I will too but I will be having surgery while she's at my place and I wanted to know what you guys think could help something fresh outta rehab?
Member
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: WI
Posts: 1,426
Hi there, I kept my RAD busy, took her to meetings and her IOP program, 4 days a week. Have the boundaries set up for living in your home. Steer clear of all places or people who might trigger a relapse, most important thing I did was love her and walk with her down that road to sobriety. Talk when she needed to talk, yet gave her the privacy she needed. She wanted to be sober and I am hoping she will want this for the rest of her life. She's 19 now and has 12 weeks of sobriety in so far. Never give up hope. TF
Member
Join Date: Oct 2013
Posts: 15
As a recovered addict I can tell you the most important thing you can do for your sister is to treat her like a person. I know that sounds so simple but when I first got clean I could tell people were tip toeing around me, they were treating me like I was so fragile and like I couldn't handle anything. The people that I am most grateful to are the ones that laughed with me, talked to me as they always did, and the ones that weren't afraid to put me in my place when I was out of line.
Also, just because something just got out of rehab doesn't mean the only thing they want to talk about is rehab, sobriety, and their plan to stay clean. Sometimes those topics are best left for meetings or with friends who have been there.
Just love her, be there for her, and most of all be the sibling you have always been.
Also, just because something just got out of rehab doesn't mean the only thing they want to talk about is rehab, sobriety, and their plan to stay clean. Sometimes those topics are best left for meetings or with friends who have been there.
Just love her, be there for her, and most of all be the sibling you have always been.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2013
Location: Toronto, Canada
Posts: 43
of course I will tell her about this site. It's a great site for support for me as a recovering alcoholic/addict and I want to share it with her. I never been to rehab so I'm not really sure about what to do or say.
My sister had one goal when she went to rehab and it was to get her job back, I know they like her and she's/was a great police officer. If she goes back to the job she was doing I dunno what will happen to her. They want her back and I'm afraid they will put too much pressure on her.
I don't think she needs this. And I will try to act the same with her!
My sister had one goal when she went to rehab and it was to get her job back, I know they like her and she's/was a great police officer. If she goes back to the job she was doing I dunno what will happen to her. They want her back and I'm afraid they will put too much pressure on her.
I don't think she needs this. And I will try to act the same with her!
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,431
No drug use is a pretty reasonable rule under the circumstances I think.
Elder sister or not, it's your place and any visitor needs to respect that
Before you have your sister join SR - think about if that may have an impact on you.
She may read this thread for example.
Will you be able to say what you want? is your account secure?
D
Elder sister or not, it's your place and any visitor needs to respect that
Before you have your sister join SR - think about if that may have an impact on you.
She may read this thread for example.
Will you be able to say what you want? is your account secure?
D
One Day At A Time
Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: UK
Posts: 561
Maybe print out a list of local meetings for her. And definitely have strong ground rules. The tough love approach was affective wite when i came out of rehab. My family loved and supportedme but i had to take responsibility for my own recovery. Unfortunately i relapsed but that isn't everyone's story. i y recovery lost priority. Look after yourself and i wish you and your sister the very best!
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,497
I agree with Dee. Give it some thought and make boundaries that you can live with. The boundaries are not to control her, but to take care of you. Keep in mind that you can give your sister lots of love, but she needs to do the recovery work.
And, do give thought to asking her to join SR. While it's the best recovery site, it would definitely cramp your style.
And, do give thought to asking her to join SR. While it's the best recovery site, it would definitely cramp your style.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2013
Location: Toronto, Canada
Posts: 43
My sister knows how I feel about all this. We had a family meeting in rehab and I was real honest with her. She may not even use the site even if I mention it to her. I don't think it'll change anything if she decides to become a member on here but I'll think about it for sure.
Would it be a good thing to tell her that I won't tolerate drug or alcohol at my place and ask her what she wanna do, how she's planning to stay clean? This way it will come from her and it may be more effective
Would it be a good thing to tell her that I won't tolerate drug or alcohol at my place and ask her what she wanna do, how she's planning to stay clean? This way it will come from her and it may be more effective
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