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Day 2

Old 11-04-2013, 07:36 AM
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I'm on day 2 today! Wow! I'm in the same boat as you guys. Last night I had the impossible dreams all night, where I was trying to do something and I couldn't, over and over and over. I do feel really good today even though I feel that I did sleep very much. I'm 32 been washing them down pretty heavy everyday for about 10 years. The money, the time, and toll on my waist has made me very angry with myself. I just hope I can occupy all this time that I once spent drinking beer. Everything I do I structured around drinking. You hang in there dirk! You are not alone!
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Old 11-04-2013, 07:48 AM
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Dirk, good luck and kudos and your bravery. I have never had alchohol problems but grew up with a very bad drunk of a mother who is (thankfully) been sober for about 3 or 4 years. She is so amazing when she is just her...You are so lucky to have a family still as well because I know that there was a time when I was fully prepared to cut my mother off from my life as if she were a corpse!! Scary heavy stuff, nothing but best wishes and love buddy, hang in there, I know it is super cliche but take one day, one hour, one minute, one second at a time!!
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Old 11-04-2013, 08:45 AM
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Hi Dirk and Welcome to SR. Supports our name and recovery is our game. Congrats on day 3! I'm not a drinker, but I had those awfully vivid dreams when I quite smoking cigs! My RAD had horrible dreams, when she quit opiates, nightmares in fact. Her Dr. gave her a med for the nightmares and she rarely has them anymore. I cannot name the med but if you PM me I can talk to you about it. No medical advice, I remember. Good job so far and welcome back to the word of sobriety! TF
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Old 11-04-2013, 11:45 AM
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Hi Dirk
I am just coming to the end of day 3. I feel quite well for it BUT I do feel tired, a bit fuzzy, but at the same time more awake having quit the booze (I hope that makes sense). I think my body is physically working overtime to rid the toxins out of me and that's making me a bit restless in the night.
I had some REALLY odd dreams last night- one centred on me and my family living in some great big house in the country (we live in a little apartment in the city!) and the toilet in this property was outside, down a lane, ages away, and you had to walk in the dark to get to it. When you got there you couldn't see properly, and then the toilet was all broken. And in my dream I got upset and started crying- because in my dream I had been drinking, and nobody could help me relieve myself.
I am no psychologist, but THAT dream was very vivid and I was so glad to wake up, realise it wasn't true and relax. I hope they go in time! xxxx Good luck with day 3
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Old 11-04-2013, 11:52 AM
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Dirk, instead of being upset about the time you spent drinking instead of fathering, focus instead on what a good example you are going to be to your children for admitting and addressing a problem you have and putting everything you have into your recovery, for the sake of yourself and the love of your family. That will be a major blessing for them, especially when they turn into adults and run into problems in their lives. You want to be an inspiration to them that problems can be solved. You can do this!
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Old 11-04-2013, 06:06 PM
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Smile

Originally Posted by Jessicacat1 View Post
Hi Dirk
I am just coming to the end of day 3. I feel quite well for it BUT I do feel tired, a bit fuzzy, but at the same time more awake having quit the booze (I hope that makes sense). I think my body is physically working overtime to rid the toxins out of me and that's making me a bit restless in the night.
I had some REALLY odd dreams last night- one centred on me and my family living in some great big house in the country (we live in a little apartment in the city!) and the toilet in this property was outside, down a lane, ages away, and you had to walk in the dark to get to it. When you got there you couldn't see properly, and then the toilet was all broken. And in my dream I got upset and started crying- because in my dream I had been drinking, and nobody could help me relieve myself.
I am no psychologist, but THAT dream was very vivid and I was so glad to wake up, realise it wasn't true and relax. I hope they go in time! xxxx Good luck with day 3
Good job! I noticed that several of us on this string are in our first week and having weird dreams. Some even similar in meaning or symbolism. Fascinating! I feel physically tired as well as emotionally tired also. But, I have not had a craving. Hang in there with me and the others.
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Old 11-04-2013, 07:09 PM
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Some powerful posts here, dirk. Thank you.
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Old 11-04-2013, 07:21 PM
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Originally Posted by needing2change View Post
dirk, welcome to day three. I'm on day 6. Sleeping much more soundly. Pete
Keep it up! I plan on chasing you in days, so you keep running ahead!
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Old 11-04-2013, 07:26 PM
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Originally Posted by jverch1 View Post
I'm on day 2 today! Wow! I'm in the same boat as you guys. Last night I had the impossible dreams all night, where I was trying to do something and I couldn't, over and over and over. I do feel really good today even though I feel that I did sleep very much. I'm 32 been washing them down pretty heavy everyday for about 10 years. The money, the time, and toll on my waist has made me very angry with myself. I just hope I can occupy all this time that I once spent drinking beer. Everything I do I structured around drinking. You hang in there dirk! You are not alone!
Thanks! The encouragement from everyone is amazing! You caught on and took action 15 years earlier than I. Think of all the positive things you can do in the next 15 years... Keep it up!
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Old 11-04-2013, 07:47 PM
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I posted about the nice time I had yesterday morning with my daughter running errands but I forgot to tell you about something that happened last night. My wife had been working on a project for work all day on the computer. Just before bed she lost the document she was working on. She told me that she had saved it several times but for some reason the document crashed and she couldn't find it or recover it. She tried document searches and other tricks but to no avail. She was in tears. She had spent hours on that work and was going to use it in a meeting today. I told her that I didn't know how to help her. I went about my routine and an idea struck me. I went back and as it turns out she had opened the document originally from an email and was clicking save instead of save as. We found the document in a temp folder in tact. The drunk me would never had thought to look at that. Because I had not been drinking I saved her hours of rework. That was positive reinforcement for me.
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Old 11-05-2013, 03:26 AM
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Keep it up man! I just got to day 7 and I'll tell you those physical uncomfortableness go away and you'll feel better. Around day 5 I was like, wow this is the first time my hands haven't been shaky in years! Such a good feeling. I had pretty knarly sweats, chills, shakes, vivid dreams and anxiety for the first few days, but they went away and physically right now I feel better than I've felt in a long time. Hang in there, it's almost over.
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Old 11-05-2013, 04:25 AM
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I'm on day 2 also! What a fantastic forum this is-why didn't I come here sooner? Feeling so inspired by the stories, it's brilliant to see I'm not alone. We can all do this, woo woo.
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Old 11-05-2013, 04:27 AM
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Originally Posted by dirk626 View Post
Because I had not been drinking I saved her hours of rework. That was positive reinforcement for me.
Welcome Dirk! I simply love this. That is positive reinforcement for me too!!!
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Old 11-05-2013, 04:32 AM
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day 3 here. so the nightmares seem to have died down but still having vivid dreams. also my tasted seem to made a return. that's an odd one I didn't expect!
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Old 11-05-2013, 04:33 AM
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Guys, I am on Day 39. The first two weeks are the only time I experienced the crazy, worrisome, almost panic attack type dreams. I dreamt about some form of alcohol/alcoholism every single night for those first two weeks. I even took Dramamine because I became fearful of the dreams and sleep. After two weeks of sobriety, the vivid dreams stopped (occasional pleasant dreams happen - I am guessing that is normal). I sleep wonderfully and fully every single night (without any sleep aids) and I wake up refreshed like I can't even remember the last time I felt this good. It gets better and it gets better soon! I do try to do yoga and meditation at night. Exercise and meditation helps a lot with calming the mind and the body. Keep on, keeping on. It is so worth it!!!
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Old 11-05-2013, 04:50 AM
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tastebuds was what i meant. stupid phone!
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Old 11-05-2013, 02:26 PM
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Hi Dirk, just checking in. I hope day 4 went well for you. That is awesome how you were able to help your wife in a time of need. You both got to experience the benefits of your sobriety! Congrats.
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Old 11-05-2013, 03:42 PM
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on your success Dirk626- and everyone who has posted. I agree- I love this family SOOOOOOOOOOO MUCH. You all are wonderful!
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Old 11-05-2013, 04:24 PM
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Originally Posted by dirk626 View Post
I guess I will be a pest over the next several days while I try and occupy my mind. I've been on vacation all week which was part of the situation with the latest bender. I'm looking forward to work tomorrow. I ran my daughter around this morning running errands and it was nice spending time with her on a Sunday morning. Normally I would spend most of the morning sleeping and if I did take her around I would be disengaged shall I say, do to the hangover. I look forward to climbing into bed tonight sober. That is my favorite time when I don't drink. I relax and enjoy the thought of how lucky I am. Then when I wake up I'm so glad that I went to bed sober...it's like a double bonus. When I drink I snore. When I snore my wife goes to the spare bedroom. I woke up the other night after getting drunk and the bed was empty. I stared at the ceiling and thought to myself, "She can't hold on forever. Someday she is going to give up and you will wake up without her every night. You will be alone, and it won't be in this bed or in this house." I felt profoundly sad and so guilty for cheating on my wife and kids with the booze. Alcohol has been almost a living thing in my life for nearly 30 years. But in moments of clarity I know that it is nothing but ethyl alcohol. A disinfectant and poisonous. I see myself as this ridiculous person taking sips out of a poison bottle marveling at the effects as it starts to shut down my body. Huh, what a fool I have been. A buffoon! I am overwhelmed with the support you folks have given me already. I have been reading other's stories and the support and encouragement they are receiving. Thank you!
Dirk we don't care if your a pest. That's how we all get help here. And this story you just posted I could write the same identical story thanks for sharing I could see myself in that post. Happy trails
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Old 11-05-2013, 07:55 PM
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Originally Posted by beancounter26 View Post
Hi Dirk, just checking in. I hope day 4 went well for you. That is awesome how you were able to help your wife in a time of need. You both got to experience the benefits of your sobriety! Congrats.
Day 4 went real well. Still tired but my mind feels clearer and my mood is good. No time to even think about drinking today, but I didn't. My daughter's high school volleyball team finished up their year tonight with a loss at Regionals for a seat in the state tournament. This team beat them twice this year so it was not unexpected. One thing I have never done is show up at one of my children's events after drinking. My father, when he showed up, always showed up smelling like booze. I swore I would never do that and I have stuck to that oath. So, I never had the urge to drink on days when I knew that I had a kid thing to attend.

How are doing? Since your on SR today I assume you're doing well. I've only been out here a few days but I have already grown to feel a vested interest in those that I have reached out to support, and to those that have supported me. I feel relieved when I see they have posted. I know folks are busy, but I'm guessing if you don't hear from someone in a while it could mean that they have stumbled.

Thanks for checking in Beancounter26, it matters!
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