My father died today: Stoned, alone, lonely but not unloved.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: Australia
Posts: 11,351
Poignancy to the highest degree.
I have so much empathy , you are really hurting.
Like most alcoholics , your Dad was highly intelligent , hence his boss not wanting to lose him and the clever work he achieved .
I hope you don't get engulfed with your grief as reading between the lines we can see your bond with your Dad
My heart goes out to you .
Those cupcakes were heavenly to him. Smile at the thought of him having some leftovers in his beard xx
Please stay around and post and let us ease your burden albeit small to how you must be feeling SwanD xxx
Bless
I have so much empathy , you are really hurting.
Like most alcoholics , your Dad was highly intelligent , hence his boss not wanting to lose him and the clever work he achieved .
I hope you don't get engulfed with your grief as reading between the lines we can see your bond with your Dad
My heart goes out to you .Those cupcakes were heavenly to him. Smile at the thought of him having some leftovers in his beard xx
Please stay around and post and let us ease your burden albeit small to how you must be feeling SwanD xxx
Bless
Member
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: Sonoran Desert & Southeast Asia
Posts: 6,561
SwanDiva, that was a sad, beautiful, poignant post. I lost my father to alcohol, and was not there when he died. Thank you for posting that, remember the good times, and know that he really loved you, in spite of his disease. And he knew you loved him too. May he rest in peace and may you find peace also.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2012
Posts: 5,937
I'm sorry for your loss, SwanDiva. Sadly, that's the way the ride ends for some of us. Hopefully you don't drink or use. Having lost my own dad a couple years ago I know there's nothing I can say that will console you. What helps me is remembering the totally of the man, what kind of person he was. Remember the love and leave the rest behind.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: South East England
Posts: 8,009
Thank you for such a beautifully written post. Take heart that your words will undoubtably have helped somebody here. Someone maybe who has a daughter that loves them as deeply as you did yours. Or maybe someone like me who has active alcoholism in their family and who is struggling to resolve their emotional ties to someone who is intent on killing themselves as my Dad is.
I hope this gives you even the smallest amount of comfort as you grieve.
Your story will have helped.
Best wishes and big hugs to you x
I hope this gives you even the smallest amount of comfort as you grieve.
Your story will have helped.
Best wishes and big hugs to you x
Member
Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: Ohio
Posts: 3,785
I am so sorry for your loss.
This part really spoke to me. It is so true. I have tried it with others and I tried it on myself.
Originally Posted by SwanDiva 
I yelled, as if I could scream him to sanity. I tried. You can't.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: Massachusetts
Posts: 3,550
Swan Diva:
Your eloquent post saddens my heart, a touching tribute, speaking of the great loss which you must feel, the memory of "what might have been", the terrible power of addiction. He is to be blamed no more than any other who have fallen in the struggle against a terrible adversary. I can't help thinking of Dylan Thomas' great tribute to his father, "Do not go gentle into that good night." I recall hearing Thomas recite that back in 1950. He was sober enough to do that in his memorable voice. As you know, he died, shortly after, of alcoholism. My thoughts are with you in your grief.
W.
Your eloquent post saddens my heart, a touching tribute, speaking of the great loss which you must feel, the memory of "what might have been", the terrible power of addiction. He is to be blamed no more than any other who have fallen in the struggle against a terrible adversary. I can't help thinking of Dylan Thomas' great tribute to his father, "Do not go gentle into that good night." I recall hearing Thomas recite that back in 1950. He was sober enough to do that in his memorable voice. As you know, he died, shortly after, of alcoholism. My thoughts are with you in your grief.
W.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: Kamloops BC Canada
Posts: 11
You have a deeper love within, as is shown in the way you portray your dearly departed, that tells me you WILL get through this...
Here is a test, to find whether or not your mission on earth is finished. If you're alive, it isn't.
Richard Bach
You God look over you.
Here is a test, to find whether or not your mission on earth is finished. If you're alive, it isn't.
Richard Bach
You God look over you.
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