striving for abstinence
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: wolverhampton. west midlands
Posts: 3
striving for abstinence
i have been struggling with alcoholism for 17 yrs. ive lost family, friends, jobs, self respect and narrowly avoided prison. i fall on and off the wagon regularly n then have to go through horrific detox which get longer to recover from the older i get. i want total abstinence as i want to be happy and live life.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2011
Posts: 2,308
Hi Madmaz and welcome to SR,
Glad you have made the decision to give up. moderation never worked for me. if it had I wouldn't be here. I needed a program to stay sober and SR is an invaluable tool and support to creep me sober these 2.5 years.
CaiHong
Glad you have made the decision to give up. moderation never worked for me. if it had I wouldn't be here. I needed a program to stay sober and SR is an invaluable tool and support to creep me sober these 2.5 years.
CaiHong
Community Greeter
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Upstate New York
Posts: 51,554
Welcome to SR Madmaz. We all understand how you feel. This is a great place for support and encouragement.
I found it was much easier to stop all together. I fooled myself into thinking I could control it, but it never worked out that way - ever. Each time I drank I led myself into danger & embarrassment. I had to admit it was never fun anymore - and I didn't need it in my life. It feels wonderful to be free. You can do it! I hope you'll keep posting.
I found it was much easier to stop all together. I fooled myself into thinking I could control it, but it never worked out that way - ever. Each time I drank I led myself into danger & embarrassment. I had to admit it was never fun anymore - and I didn't need it in my life. It feels wonderful to be free. You can do it! I hope you'll keep posting.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: wolverhampton. west midlands
Posts: 3
thankyou for messages of support it means so much. im not sure how this site works but practice makes perfect thanks again. its gr8 to be back with people that understand 
Member
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: perth Western Australia
Posts: 132
im hearing ya
the first drink will always lead to the craving for more alcohol, more drinking sessions
How many times did I prove that to myself.....
and then complete chaos ensues....
21 weeks sober, only because I accept, I cant even have one. it really makes it easier....
good luck.... it can be don't. The best thing is... your still here trying
the first drink will always lead to the craving for more alcohol, more drinking sessions
How many times did I prove that to myself.....
and then complete chaos ensues....
21 weeks sober, only because I accept, I cant even have one. it really makes it easier....
good luck.... it can be don't. The best thing is... your still here trying
Grateful to be free
Join Date: May 2009
Location: Arizona
Posts: 3,680
Here is one way of looking at it that helped me quite for good. Instead of trying to moderate or feel sorry for myself because I can't drink or use recreational drugs.
There are many things I could do when I was younger that I can't do now. This is just one more of them. Natural process of life. Is it really worth making myself miserable over it or literally killing myself over it?
There are things I used to be able to eat that I can't now. There are physical things I used to do and enjoy that I can't do now. The love of my life divorced me. I've lost people who were tremendously important to me, and I can't have them in my life now. Yet I survive. And if I stay open, there are things in my life that I couldn't do before. New wonderful friends come along. I have a grandchild now. I have a pet I adore. I have the opportunity to do things that were impossible for me before.
I could choose to make quitting booze a bigger deal than it had to be, or I could quit, experience withdrawal, which is like a really really bad flu, mourn for a bit, and get on with things.
Like the loss of a loved one or spouse, which truly and deeply changes many things in our life, we sometimes need therapy, a support group, information and lots of courage. But it IS doable, and there is life after drinking. The best piece of advice I ever ever got from any therapist was "Stay open to new perspectives."
There are many things I could do when I was younger that I can't do now. This is just one more of them. Natural process of life. Is it really worth making myself miserable over it or literally killing myself over it?
There are things I used to be able to eat that I can't now. There are physical things I used to do and enjoy that I can't do now. The love of my life divorced me. I've lost people who were tremendously important to me, and I can't have them in my life now. Yet I survive. And if I stay open, there are things in my life that I couldn't do before. New wonderful friends come along. I have a grandchild now. I have a pet I adore. I have the opportunity to do things that were impossible for me before.
I could choose to make quitting booze a bigger deal than it had to be, or I could quit, experience withdrawal, which is like a really really bad flu, mourn for a bit, and get on with things.
Like the loss of a loved one or spouse, which truly and deeply changes many things in our life, we sometimes need therapy, a support group, information and lots of courage. But it IS doable, and there is life after drinking. The best piece of advice I ever ever got from any therapist was "Stay open to new perspectives."
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: wolverhampton. west midlands
Posts: 3
Originally Posted by madmaz07 
i have been struggling with alcoholism for 17 yrs. ive lost family, friends, jobs, self respect and narrowly avoided prison. i fall on and off the wagon regularly n then have to go through horrific detox which get longer to recover from the older i get. i want total abstinence as i want to be happy and live life.
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