60 Days today
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Join Date: Aug 2013
Posts: 188
60 Days today
Hello, I am not posting here to fanfare or anything like that. I have not had an easy time of it the last 60 days. But, I am 60 days clean and sober. 60 days of ups and downs, calling my sponsor still almost every day. And thank God for her and all the other people I have called on this past 60 days.
It took me almost 7 months this year to decide to even think about coming clean. Then I did it for 40 days ON MY OWN. And it failed. When I wasn't ready to give it up, I hid my stash in my house and I swear it was calling my name. Then I kept a little tiny stash which caused my slip after 43 days.
Now, again at 60 days clean, there are bad days for sure. But, there have been a ton of good ones. And when a craving hits me, it certainly does pass. I can see that now.
I am going to my Friday night speaker meeting to get my 60 day tag. When I took my 30 day tag, I felt amazing. Tonight, I am rather resigned but proud. It is a different feeling. This is no big accomplishment in the long run, but right now, it is everything to me.
Coming clean with my family, my friends, my family doctor, these things all helped a lot. Telling myself the truth about my addiction - this has been harder. Which is why I am still on step 1. I know I can get to 90 days now. It is only 30 days away after all. And I have done that already twice.
Keep clean...don't use no matter what. No matter what don't use. And chase off that AV like it the devil. It is the devil. And you are so much better than listening to the devil.
It took me almost 7 months this year to decide to even think about coming clean. Then I did it for 40 days ON MY OWN. And it failed. When I wasn't ready to give it up, I hid my stash in my house and I swear it was calling my name. Then I kept a little tiny stash which caused my slip after 43 days.
Now, again at 60 days clean, there are bad days for sure. But, there have been a ton of good ones. And when a craving hits me, it certainly does pass. I can see that now.
I am going to my Friday night speaker meeting to get my 60 day tag. When I took my 30 day tag, I felt amazing. Tonight, I am rather resigned but proud. It is a different feeling. This is no big accomplishment in the long run, but right now, it is everything to me.
Coming clean with my family, my friends, my family doctor, these things all helped a lot. Telling myself the truth about my addiction - this has been harder. Which is why I am still on step 1. I know I can get to 90 days now. It is only 30 days away after all. And I have done that already twice.
Keep clean...don't use no matter what. No matter what don't use. And chase off that AV like it the devil. It is the devil. And you are so much better than listening to the devil.
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