Day 1 I just want too be done with drugs forever
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2013
Posts: 15
Day 1 I just want too be done with drugs forever
Hello my name is Steve I'm 30 years of age I been struggling wit alcohole an drugs since I've been 15 pretty much every day it all started wit weed smoked every day from my freshman year til I was a sienor in high school then I had my first panic attack when I was smoking were I felt like I was gonna die next day I smoked same thing happend tarted like 10 more times panic attacks so here I am so depressed now because that's all I did an enjoyed it 2 months go buy of being miserable I got a 6 pack of beer an felt great calm no panic attacks so I felt like that was my savior then 3 years goes by drinking every day I try cocaine loved it did it on weekends but did make me very deppressed the next day so I say around I was 27 tried oxy 30's loved them I started by taking a quarter of 1 an I was high as a kite I'm saying this is great better high an cheaper well as time went started taking halts then whole ones now I'm 30 an I'm taking 6-8 oxys a day figure 120-150$$ dollers a day an I'm so depressed I have a good job an a great wife that's been putting up wit my **** since we been 18 today is my first day going sober I took a suboxone for I won't get sick but latly I been so depressed an I really want too work on recovering thanks for listening I'm new on app today I read story's an it really is making me feel better please write me if any one has any pointers 
Steve! You've come to a great site for support in getting clean and sober. 
Member
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Atlanta
Posts: 31,179
Stretch - Welcome to SR!!!
I have to admit, I lurked here for over 2 years before signing on and was not clean most of that time. I started out abusing alcohol, quit that; moved onto opiates, quit that; found crack, and that brought me to my knees.
My first recommendation is see a dr. who knows about addiction. I know, we don't want to do that (I didn't) but a good checkup is never a bad thing and if you aren't getting the subs from a dr., from what I understand, you don't know how much you should be on, when to taper, etc.
I was an RN when I first started abusing things. Lost that career to addiction. I learned, early on, when it comes to our health...don't like to your doctor or nurse - most aren't dummies and none of them can help you if they don't know the truth.
The very first dr. I went to, I walked in there and said "I'm a recovering addict, this is what I've abused, this is what's going on with me....". He was awesome, even asked me about addiction as a friend of his from medical school was struggling. He moved on, got another dr., told her the same thing.
My point is, I think support is truly vital to recovery. We are here, and SR is a pretty awesome group. However, having a dr. that understands and can help you out, monitor you early on? Important, too.
I hope you keep reading and posting. You will find you are not alone and there are a lot of people here who get what you are going through.
Hugs and prayers,
Amy
I have to admit, I lurked here for over 2 years before signing on and was not clean most of that time. I started out abusing alcohol, quit that; moved onto opiates, quit that; found crack, and that brought me to my knees.
My first recommendation is see a dr. who knows about addiction. I know, we don't want to do that (I didn't) but a good checkup is never a bad thing and if you aren't getting the subs from a dr., from what I understand, you don't know how much you should be on, when to taper, etc.
I was an RN when I first started abusing things. Lost that career to addiction. I learned, early on, when it comes to our health...don't like to your doctor or nurse - most aren't dummies and none of them can help you if they don't know the truth.
The very first dr. I went to, I walked in there and said "I'm a recovering addict, this is what I've abused, this is what's going on with me....". He was awesome, even asked me about addiction as a friend of his from medical school was struggling. He moved on, got another dr., told her the same thing.
My point is, I think support is truly vital to recovery. We are here, and SR is a pretty awesome group. However, having a dr. that understands and can help you out, monitor you early on? Important, too.
I hope you keep reading and posting. You will find you are not alone and there are a lot of people here who get what you are going through.
Hugs and prayers,
Amy
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2013
Posts: 15
Originally Posted by Impurrfect 
Stretch - Welcome to SR!!!
I have to admit, I lurked here for over 2 years before signing on and was not clean most of that time. I started out abusing alcohol, quit that; moved onto opiates, quit that; found crack, and that brought me to my knees.
My first recommendation is see a dr. who knows about addiction. I know, we don't want to do that (I didn't) but a good checkup is never a bad thing and if you aren't getting the subs from a dr., from what I understand, you don't know how much you should be on, when to taper, etc.
I was an RN when I first started abusing things. Lost that career to addiction. I learned, early on, when it comes to our health...don't like to your doctor or nurse - most aren't dummies and none of them can help you if they don't know the truth.
The very first dr. I went to, I walked in there and said "I'm a recovering addict, this is what I've abused, this is what's going on with me....". He was awesome, even asked me about addiction as a friend of his from medical school was struggling. He moved on, got another dr., told her the same thing.
My point is, I think support is truly vital to recovery. We are here, and SR is a pretty awesome group. However, having a dr. that understands and can help you out, monitor you early on? Important, too.
I hope you keep reading and posting. You will find you are not alone and there are a lot of people here who get what you are going through.
Hugs and prayers,
Amy
I have to admit, I lurked here for over 2 years before signing on and was not clean most of that time. I started out abusing alcohol, quit that; moved onto opiates, quit that; found crack, and that brought me to my knees.
My first recommendation is see a dr. who knows about addiction. I know, we don't want to do that (I didn't) but a good checkup is never a bad thing and if you aren't getting the subs from a dr., from what I understand, you don't know how much you should be on, when to taper, etc.
I was an RN when I first started abusing things. Lost that career to addiction. I learned, early on, when it comes to our health...don't like to your doctor or nurse - most aren't dummies and none of them can help you if they don't know the truth.
The very first dr. I went to, I walked in there and said "I'm a recovering addict, this is what I've abused, this is what's going on with me....". He was awesome, even asked me about addiction as a friend of his from medical school was struggling. He moved on, got another dr., told her the same thing.
My point is, I think support is truly vital to recovery. We are here, and SR is a pretty awesome group. However, having a dr. that understands and can help you out, monitor you early on? Important, too.
I hope you keep reading and posting. You will find you are not alone and there are a lot of people here who get what you are going through.
Hugs and prayers,
Amy
Community Greeter
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Upstate New York
Posts: 51,524
Welcome Steve. Be proud of yourself for wanting a better life. Some never have the courage to let go.
It sounds like you're ready to be free. It's natural to feel depressed & scared in the beginning. Trust us, things will get better and easier as you get some clean time behind you. We're very glad you joined us - and by the way, you don't sound boring at all.
It sounds like you're ready to be free. It's natural to feel depressed & scared in the beginning. Trust us, things will get better and easier as you get some clean time behind you. We're very glad you joined us - and by the way, you don't sound boring at all.
Saved By Grace
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: Oop North, Furtlin' me Ferrets
Posts: 410
I totally get where you are coming from. Oxy was and is to this day my drug of choice. I've spent thousands on the little suckers, but that was years ago when the market was flooded with them and I was getting them fairly cheap. Anyways, eventually I ended up smoking tar H, then once that got old, shooting it up. To me opiates are heaven, and if it were not for all the symptoms (running out of money, getting ripped off, arrested, looking like a zombie, the hellish withdrawals) I would still be using them. Suboxone helped me a lot in the beginning, but if you can get over opiates without it I'd say thats better. But you need a serious game plan because opiates are so addictive, what are you going to do that will fill that ginantic void that the opiates use to fill? Welcome to SR man.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2013
Posts: 15
Yeah man I spent tons of money on those blue devils myself I'm tired of lying too my wife she says I just don't understand where all your money goes an why are u broke I don't think I have anymore excuses too tell her it came too the Piont that I said too my self I got too stop or get a doctor too prescribe them but I made the choice too stop I just wanna end the ******** if anyone has any pointers that would be great
Saved By Grace
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: Oop North, Furtlin' me Ferrets
Posts: 410
Your probley going to experience a lot of cravings, fiending, depression, etc. Have you considered going to NA? I don't have any pointers other than use the resources and support available to you. Whatever you have to do to stay away from that crap, do it.
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