I Guess This Is My Story
 

After a painful childhood, I discovered grass at the age of 16, and thought I had gone to heaven. By 19, I was smoking almost every day, and it began to control my life. It came before college, my boyfriend, my friends, just everything.

By the time I was working full-time at 23, it was everything. Nothing but nothing was going to get in the way of me and my choof.
I lost my job, and then the next one, and I spent every waking moment trying to work out how to score. This went on until I was 30.

That was when, whilst working in a factory, 'cos I'd stuffed up every chance to be the academic I always wanted to be, I decided to quit.

So guess what happened then? From the very next day, I started drinking. And boy could I drink. So much chardonnay, rivers of the stuff.
So then I got caught drink-driving, twice, actually. Got so bad that I couldn't work any more, and fell into a deep depression.

This went on for years. I tried AA, got clean for a while, and then started smoking all over again. Eventually, by the age of 38, I landed a pretty decent job in publishing, and ultimately messed up so badly that they fired me. And started drinking again.

More AA, then more smoking, then a stint in NA. Now I was 40. Somehow I managed to pull up a bit, and got another OK job. Guess what? Got stoned, and got fired. I think I went back to NA, and had a few good months. Then rinse and repeat. Same old me.

It wasn't until I was forced to do a course for my job network, that I trained to become an aged-care worker. Then my mum got sick. Very sick. Alzheimers, vascular dementia, severe rheumatoid arthritis, and a few other things. My dad couldn't cope. So my older sister and I decided that I would become their carer.

It was truly a blessing. Had I not messed up my life, I would not have been in the position to help. So I did, for 3 years. Still smoked, still drank, but not so that anyone noticed. (Honestly, it amazed me, but no one knew).
But when my sister took it all away, and put them in a nursing home in February 2012, I went from bad to worse.

So bad, that I lost my family. I was nuts...I couldn't cope with them.
My mum died without me being there, and for the last 5 months of last year I was completely suicidal. My boyfriend kept me alive. And Little V.

I came here to SR in November, but it wasn't until February that I really knew I had to get clean and sober or I was going to die. I was turning 50.
And I was shattered.

So I did...I actually had stopped smoking the week before I got here, and I stopped drinking on Feb 3. Feb 4 I started posting, and joined chat,
and I have never looked back.
The chat room saved my life, and then everyone else here did too.

OK, I guess I just told my story.

Amy said it would happen when I was ready!!

So much love and gratitude to everyone at SR,

Love Venus xx

PS. I turned 8 months sober yesterday...so miracles really do happen! ♥

Venuscat ;-) big hugs

It is very true what my Mum has always said.

" out of something bad , comes something good "

I can only begin to imagine the courage it took to put your story out there.

Thank you. :-)

It gives us an insight into the beautiful soul you are , always ready to help anyone in here who needs it , whilst struggling with your own demons.

This will give so many people the strength to go on.
I love you to bits , you have such empathy and a beautiful spirit.

I feel lucky to have you in my SR life

Bless :-). Xxxxx

Congrats to you on 8 months sober!! And big hugs to you for letting us know your story. :hug: Much love to you!

Congratulations, venuscat! You are a miracle!!

Congratulations on 8 months sober venuscat. Thanks for sharing your story. :)

8 months is awesome venus! Thank you so much for sharing your story with us. We love you!

You are doing great Venuscat. I think of the line in, Hope Floats, the movie. "Childhood is what you spend the rest of your life getting past." I am so glad this is working for you. I am at almost three months now, and I am so glad I have come here. You are an inspiration.

I love this post!!! Congratulations on 8 months!!! :You_Rock_:c011::c029:

Thank you for sharing your story, you're an inspiration. Congrats on 8 months!

Thank you so much for sharing that Venus. It is so good to hear how people manage to get a handle on how to overcome their addiction. You tell your story so beautifully, I really enjoyed reading it.

And congratulations on your 8 months :c011:

Thank you for sharing your story, venuscat. Congratulations on 8 months! :You_Rock_

Venus, congratulations! What an inspiring story to put me in the right frame of mind for the rest of my day (it's morning here). This post is amazing!

Thank you for sharing. It's sometimes hard to tell others about ourselves, especially the not so glamorous parts. Keep up the good work!

Thank you for sharing your story. Congrats on 8 months. You are doing this!!!

VCat, thanks for all the love and kindness you show us. You could be bitter at the world after all the pain you've gone through, but you choose a giving path. I am so grateful to have you as a friend. I'll be thinking about you today.

Big hugs to you and lil' V, :)
Cas

:Val004: I'm so proud of you venus! And I'm grateful to call you my friend.

Venuscat...
You are awesome, thank you for sharing your story. You have been a great friend these last 8 months, and its been an absolute honour to walk the sober path with you...keep up your great work, you are inspiring to the new comers, and stubborn people like me.. :)

Oh Venuscat! An amazing story. I sense the pain and beauty of hope in this and I feel it. Thank you and a heartfelt congratulations on your courage. You are an inspiration and always so kind. :supernan

V, you are a wonderful soul who has gone through a lot of suffering...and although this has been extremely tough, you came through it and it has made you the gorgeous, understanding, forgiving person that you are today. You give so much to others dear V...but I want you as of now, to start worrying a little bit less about others (just for a while...), and start giving a lot more to yourself - and that's an order! :)


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Thank you so much for sharing your story with us. Congratulations on 8 months :nyc :nyc