I know the answer but need to keep my eye on the prize
Canine Welfare Advocate
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: Norfolk, VA
Posts: 10,962
Originally Posted by CP1992 
Do you miss the bars and socializing with friends at all?
Am I happier sober, yes. But that doesn't mean I don't have my down days. Some days I feel pretty rotten. Guess what...it doesn't make me want to drink.
That bell or bike person
Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: london
Posts: 4,978
Hey CP ,
I have a lot less hastle and stress in my life now i don't drink and that makes me happier.
I also work on making my life as great as i can sober . I have more time now i'm sober, so i should be able to fit a lot of great experience and living into the time i have left on our planet .
I don't miss bars or pubs or the drinkers who frequent them , my friends are still my friends
other than those friends who were actually "just" drinking buddies .
Bestwishes, m
I have a lot less hastle and stress in my life now i don't drink and that makes me happier.
I also work on making my life as great as i can sober . I have more time now i'm sober, so i should be able to fit a lot of great experience and living into the time i have left on our planet .
I don't miss bars or pubs or the drinkers who frequent them , my friends are still my friends
other than those friends who were actually "just" drinking buddies . Bestwishes, m
Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: Scandinavia
Posts: 1,344
There are some things I miss, but it is a small price to pay to avoid all the burdens of drinking.
I would not say I am always happy – it is more a relief not to drink and have the need for alcohol.
Even my depressed days are lighter than they used to.
Sure I miss a beer from time to time but if I think it through and see all that stuff I avoid by not giving in to it – then it is with a smile I say farewell to those beers.
I would not say I am always happy – it is more a relief not to drink and have the need for alcohol.
Even my depressed days are lighter than they used to.
Sure I miss a beer from time to time but if I think it through and see all that stuff I avoid by not giving in to it – then it is with a smile I say farewell to those beers.
Guest
Join Date: Dec 2012
Posts: 7,097
I'm happier sober
I don't miss:
-talking nonsense in pubs
-saying inappropriate things to friends and strangers
-being self conscious all the time and trying to drink it away
-falling over in the pub and being a laughing stock
-wasting money in the pub
-waking up full of shame and remorse after a night in the pub
-smelling bad,feeling bad,feeling sick,headachey,tired
-feeling anxious and depressed and full of shame,fear and regret
Now sober my life is generally peaceful and not full of drama and anxiety. The difficulty is I'm more self aware and realize I do have issues that need addressing rather than ignoring them,drowning in drink. I'm dealing with stuff sometimes uncomfortable but it passes and feel great once I've actually dealt with something.
I have a serenity and peace of mind I've never had before and I would not give that up for anyone. If I never step foot in a bar again it would not bother me one bit.
I don't miss:
-talking nonsense in pubs
-saying inappropriate things to friends and strangers
-being self conscious all the time and trying to drink it away
-falling over in the pub and being a laughing stock
-wasting money in the pub
-waking up full of shame and remorse after a night in the pub
-smelling bad,feeling bad,feeling sick,headachey,tired
-feeling anxious and depressed and full of shame,fear and regret
Now sober my life is generally peaceful and not full of drama and anxiety. The difficulty is I'm more self aware and realize I do have issues that need addressing rather than ignoring them,drowning in drink. I'm dealing with stuff sometimes uncomfortable but it passes and feel great once I've actually dealt with something.
I have a serenity and peace of mind I've never had before and I would not give that up for anyone. If I never step foot in a bar again it would not bother me one bit.
bona fido dog-lover
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: SF Bay area, CA
Posts: 99,780
I always drank at home by myself so don't miss socializing at bars. I never went there. But yes, I'm noticeably happier and can tolerate my bad days now without wanting to drink over things.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: Melbourne Australia.
Posts: 3,748
The old stuff was so bad/crazy I have grown enough to ridicule it all, rather than miss any aspects of it.
Also, approaching 5 months, some different 'good stuff' is certainly starting to seep through......
Also, approaching 5 months, some different 'good stuff' is certainly starting to seep through......
Member
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: Boston
Posts: 61
I miss a lot of things, but I'm still very new in recovery. I miss the physical feeling of the first drink or two, which always made me feel comfortable in my skin and not alone. I miss the camaraderie of drinking with co-workers and friends (until it got ugly, it always got ugly). I love wine. Like I LOVE it, I romanticize it and before the drinking gave me only problems, I had a lot of fun drinking. I miss those days but it's a futile nostalgia because it will never be like that again.
All this to say, I understand the illusion that you're missing out and there are some real things to miss, particularly if your entire life has to change (as mine has) because it revolved around drinking (people, places, things).
But I've been told this changes, and that it gets much better, and I'm choosing to believe this until I know it myself.
Hang in there All these people can't be wrong.
All this to say, I understand the illusion that you're missing out and there are some real things to miss, particularly if your entire life has to change (as mine has) because it revolved around drinking (people, places, things).
But I've been told this changes, and that it gets much better, and I'm choosing to believe this until I know it myself.
Hang in there
All these people can't be wrong.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2013
Posts: 2,805
Tonight is my first sober Friday in over nine years. It was hard, but not as hard as I anticipated. I talked to a couple of people on the phone who had already gone to happy hour and it was funny listening to the slurry voices, the same story being repeated. I am happy to be going to bed and not passed out tonight. I was thinking today that when I decided to try to moderate my drinking, I really cut out going to "the party scene." I was proud of removing myself from "triggers." I guess that is good but all I really did was take the "party scene" to the privacy of my home. I guess my AV was saying, "hey as long as no one else sees you acting like a jack-ass, it's all good." It's amazing the perspective you get, when you give yourself some SOBER reflection.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: Florida
Posts: 263
others have shared what I feel but to further reinforce: I am not a constantly boiling pot of happy optimism, but overall my quality of life and emotional state is orders of magnitude better. Even my dark days really arent that bad compared to the crippling alcohol fueled depression i experienced daily while drinking. What has been notable for me is that now I recognize that to a large degree I have the power to change my situation when things arent going well or I am unhappy! I am so thankful that I made the decision to get sober and stick with it. It just keeps getting better.
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
