Am I an alcoholic or just a problem drinker?
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: Houston, TX
Posts: 1,285
Am I an alcoholic or just a problem drinker?
I know I'm not a normal drinker, that much I'm sure of. But to say I'm an alcoholic, I don't know. I don't need eye-openers in the morning, I don't get the shakes, I go all day without even wanting a drink, I can have a beer or two here or there and stop. I work offshore for weeks at a time where alcohol is not allowed and I manage just fine, though I do think about it fairly often while at sea.
But at home each night at 10 o'clock I start slamming beers, drinking 4 beers per hour until I’m ready for bed; at least 14 to 18 or so each night, whether I want to drink or not. I have to white-knuckle it to get through a night without drinking at home. And I don't have a stressful home life. I’m not married nor have any kids, and with a job offshore, I work for several weeks at sea and then come home for several weeks: so while at home I have no work woes. I have nothing to blame my drinking on except me. I crave it at my usual drinking time. My mind starts stressing; I get depressed and even confused about what I'm supposed to do if I try going the night without drinking. I suddenly find no real joy or interest in anything. I become afraid of going to bed, knowing that while sober I'll be faced with insomnia. Usually I succumb to the pressure and make a last minute trip to the store for another 18 pack. It seems that I can't get through the night without drinking.
But I don’t have all of the characteristics of an alcoholic. I don’t drink first thing in the morning, I don’t suffer from any severe withdrawals, I go through the entire day (until my normal drinking time at 10 o’clock at night) without even wanting a drink, and recently had a couple of drinks with a friend and stopped without any trouble whatsoever (I wanted to keep drinking, but without any struggle whatsoever I was able to go the rest of the day without even thinking about drinking). If I spend a night or two away from home I’m usually able to get by without drinking (even thought the thought does cross my mind), though after a couple or three days sober I usually fall off the wagon again.
So am I an alcoholic or just a problem drinker? Even when I was unemployed and on a very tight budget I kept drinking, struggling not to as good sense told me to budget my money; yet I couldn't help it - I had to drink. I even tried AA and managed to go 10 days sober at home before falling off the wagon. Yet offshore I go a month without a problem, and mentally function well sober. I guess it's easy to abstain from a substance and function when you have no other choice, but at home alcohol is only a 5 minute car trip away.
Some may say that in this I am answering my own question. I still ask because others have said I might not yet be alcoholic because I don't share all of the criteria that qualify someone to be an alcoholic. It is said that one must determine whether he or she is an alcoholic themselves; yet if that same person determines they’re not alcoholic, those same who say that the individual must figure it out on their own will in turn say that that person is in denial. So which is it??? Am I just a problem drinker calling myself an alcoholic, or am I an alcoholic in denial by saying I’m just a problem drinker?
Alcoholic or problem drinker (obviously I'm one or the other, since normal drinkers would never be in any danger of coming close to having this dilemma), I'm ok with the answer. All I want to know is the truth!!!!!
But at home each night at 10 o'clock I start slamming beers, drinking 4 beers per hour until I’m ready for bed; at least 14 to 18 or so each night, whether I want to drink or not. I have to white-knuckle it to get through a night without drinking at home. And I don't have a stressful home life. I’m not married nor have any kids, and with a job offshore, I work for several weeks at sea and then come home for several weeks: so while at home I have no work woes. I have nothing to blame my drinking on except me. I crave it at my usual drinking time. My mind starts stressing; I get depressed and even confused about what I'm supposed to do if I try going the night without drinking. I suddenly find no real joy or interest in anything. I become afraid of going to bed, knowing that while sober I'll be faced with insomnia. Usually I succumb to the pressure and make a last minute trip to the store for another 18 pack. It seems that I can't get through the night without drinking.
But I don’t have all of the characteristics of an alcoholic. I don’t drink first thing in the morning, I don’t suffer from any severe withdrawals, I go through the entire day (until my normal drinking time at 10 o’clock at night) without even wanting a drink, and recently had a couple of drinks with a friend and stopped without any trouble whatsoever (I wanted to keep drinking, but without any struggle whatsoever I was able to go the rest of the day without even thinking about drinking). If I spend a night or two away from home I’m usually able to get by without drinking (even thought the thought does cross my mind), though after a couple or three days sober I usually fall off the wagon again.
So am I an alcoholic or just a problem drinker? Even when I was unemployed and on a very tight budget I kept drinking, struggling not to as good sense told me to budget my money; yet I couldn't help it - I had to drink. I even tried AA and managed to go 10 days sober at home before falling off the wagon. Yet offshore I go a month without a problem, and mentally function well sober. I guess it's easy to abstain from a substance and function when you have no other choice, but at home alcohol is only a 5 minute car trip away.
Some may say that in this I am answering my own question. I still ask because others have said I might not yet be alcoholic because I don't share all of the criteria that qualify someone to be an alcoholic. It is said that one must determine whether he or she is an alcoholic themselves; yet if that same person determines they’re not alcoholic, those same who say that the individual must figure it out on their own will in turn say that that person is in denial. So which is it??? Am I just a problem drinker calling myself an alcoholic, or am I an alcoholic in denial by saying I’m just a problem drinker?
Alcoholic or problem drinker (obviously I'm one or the other, since normal drinkers would never be in any danger of coming close to having this dilemma), I'm ok with the answer. All I want to know is the truth!!!!!
Member
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: North of England
Posts: 1,442
I really don't think it matters. The word 'alcoholic' is so loaded and it has social and judgemental implications so it is pretty hard to use in a neutral sense. And alcoholics are after all people with a drink problem.
Do you want to change your drinking behaviour and/or stop? Are you worried about your drinking? Is it causing you problems? If so there are things you can do. Here's the place to start too!
Do you want to change your drinking behaviour and/or stop? Are you worried about your drinking? Is it causing you problems? If so there are things you can do. Here's the place to start too!
bona fido dog-lover
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: SF Bay area, CA
Posts: 99,760
to SR! I don't think it matters what 'label' you use, as long as you know your drinking is causing you problems. If you want to stop drinking, you're in the right place for support.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: Wales UK
Posts: 859
The more you know about drinking habits the more you know that no two people are the same.
Are you thinking of going white knuckle for one last time ?
Might be a good idea.
Sounds like drinking might start to take off and take more of your life!
John.
Are you thinking of going white knuckle for one last time ?
Might be a good idea.
Sounds like drinking might start to take off and take more of your life!
John.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: Ma
Posts: 3,553
"I crave it at my usual drinking time. My mind starts stressing; I get depressed and even confused about what I'm supposed to do if I try going the night without drinking. I suddenly find no real joy or interest in anything."
I say,yes,you are an alcoholic.
Just me,but,I think problem drinking=alcoholism.
If you watched a video of somebody pounding 4 beers an hour would you think they're an alcoholic?
I say,yes,you are an alcoholic.
Just me,but,I think problem drinking=alcoholism.
If you watched a video of somebody pounding 4 beers an hour would you think they're an alcoholic?
Guest
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Canada
Posts: 4,580
In addiction, there is psychological dependence and physical dependence (late stage). You could arrest it now (which is a bloody herculean task in of itself) OR you could wait until you are fully convinced of your problem by being all out physically dependent and therefore showing "ALL the signs".
Been there, done that!
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: London
Posts: 539
14 to 18 beers a night... Welcome to the club.. Alcohol is cunning powerful and baffling I have heard people nearly die through drinking and still ask what you ask. Even if I said you are not an alcoholic at that level of consumption you will eventually die. You don't need to be an alcoholic to die from alcohol. Take care
Canine Welfare Advocate
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: Norfolk, VA
Posts: 10,962
I didn't see anything in your post about quitting. If your drinking in causing you a problem, the best solution is quitting. If you can't quit you have a problem. One of those problems might be termed "alcoholism" and there are ways to deal with that.
But it starts with quitting.
But it starts with quitting.
Member
Join Date: May 2009
Posts: 14,916
It's just semantics.
Drinking 14 - 18 beers a night at the rate of 4 per hour (alone) is, how should I put this, unusual for a "normal" drinker.
While you may not have any "typical" symptoms of an alcoholic as you define it, at the rate you are going, you will.
Alcoholism is progressive, and your body's ability to process alcohol is finite. Think of those two facts as lines on a graph. The progressive nature of alcoholism is a line sloping upward, and your body's ability to process alcohol is a line that will eventually slope downward.
When those two lines cross sometime in the future, it doesn't really matter what you call it, you're screwed.
Drinking 14 - 18 beers a night at the rate of 4 per hour (alone) is, how should I put this, unusual for a "normal" drinker.
While you may not have any "typical" symptoms of an alcoholic as you define it, at the rate you are going, you will.
Alcoholism is progressive, and your body's ability to process alcohol is finite. Think of those two facts as lines on a graph. The progressive nature of alcoholism is a line sloping upward, and your body's ability to process alcohol is a line that will eventually slope downward.
When those two lines cross sometime in the future, it doesn't really matter what you call it, you're screwed.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2009
Posts: 3,095
It should be easy to determine this. Instead of drinking a dozen or so beers tonight, just have 2. Do this for a month and see how successful you are.
Or, you could stop drinking entirely for an extended period of time, say a year or so, and see how successful you are.
If you fail at either of those 'experiments', you may have a problem that is way more serious than you think.
Or, you could stop drinking entirely for an extended period of time, say a year or so, and see how successful you are.
If you fail at either of those 'experiments', you may have a problem that is way more serious than you think.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: Nazareth, PA
Posts: 453
You've trained yourself to not crave drinking until a certain time. I'm like that with cigarettes. I only smoke 3 or so a day, but when I don't get that morning, afternoon or evening smoke, I get moody and life starts feeling difficult. That's addiction. Same with your (and my) drinking. I don't think you need to drink all day to be an alcoholic. I drank a fifth of what you drank on a daily basis (then binges on top of that), and it wasn't the quantity so much as the way it controlled me. The way I couldn't go one night without pouring the first drink. That's not "normal".
Besides, it's all semantics, I think. Problem drinker is just a nice way to say alcoholic, because our minds are so warped about what an alcoholic is from watching silly TV shows portraying drunks as old, disheveled men. An alcoholic is someone who has a drinking problem.
Besides, it's all semantics, I think. Problem drinker is just a nice way to say alcoholic, because our minds are so warped about what an alcoholic is from watching silly TV shows portraying drunks as old, disheveled men. An alcoholic is someone who has a drinking problem.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2013
Posts: 54
Yeah, I drank a quarter of what you drink and I was/am absolutely, no doubt about it, an alcoholic. Do you live in a constant state of foggy, hazy regret, anxious about nothing in particular other than a feeling that you likely have something or someone to apologize to?
most of us know what that feels like. you're not alone.
good luck
brian
most of us know what that feels like. you're not alone.
good luck
brian
Realising my life
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: Dorset, England
Posts: 3,656
Originally Posted by Nuudawn 
In addiction, there is psychological dependence and physical dependence (late stage). You could arrest it now (which is a bloody herculean task in of itself) OR you could wait until you are fully convinced of your problem by being all out physically dependent and therefore showing "ALL the signs".
I think I'm very lucky that I'm addressing this while still at the 'psychological' stage. I know that, for me, the real, intense all-out craving for alcohol comes after the first drink. If I can convince myself not to have that first one, well, it's almost plain sailing after that.
I think the 'physical' stage would be sooo much harder. The cravings must be virtually impossible to resist right from the off. I have total admiration for anyone who can conquer it at that stage.
If there's even the remotest chance that you could get there, stop right now. It could well be saving your life.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2010
Posts: 5,554
I also am of the camp that the label does no tmatter, but you are drinking waaayyy too much for good health, at the very least, and seem unable to stop, for the most part, once you start, when at home with your case fo beer.
So, you have a few restless nights? Try it. You will survive. You might just like how you feel after a week or so! Your liver sure will like it better if you quit. I got liver disease on mostly a couple or 3 glasses of wine a night(most of my drinking years, though it escalated), coupled with being overweight and got diabetes. All those stress the liver, so maybe it was not alcohol alone, but it contributed to the trifecta.
So, you have a few restless nights? Try it. You will survive. You might just like how you feel after a week or so! Your liver sure will like it better if you quit. I got liver disease on mostly a couple or 3 glasses of wine a night(most of my drinking years, though it escalated), coupled with being overweight and got diabetes. All those stress the liver, so maybe it was not alcohol alone, but it contributed to the trifecta.
Sober since 10th April 2012
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Perth, Western Australia
Posts: 6,047
Hi Danek, welcome to SR. Keep reading and educating yourself. If you do, you'll come to understand that alcoholics come in all shapes and sizes. I consider myself one although no-one else thought I was. I didn't drink in the morning, held down a good job and turned up every morning, didn't harm others, could usually control my social drinking, had no physical withdrawal symptoms. But I was going through a bottle a night, coping with strong cravings at the time I was due to drink, and feeling miserable and guilty.
Your drinking is certainly abnormal, and it sounds like what I think is a common scenario, in that you relate alcohol with relaxation. For me the trigger was finishing work and going home. I tried hypnosis, and will-power but in the end total abstinence became the only way.
If you know you need to quit, could you consider going to a treatment facility for your weeks off? Anyway, perhaps a very honest frank discussion with your doctor might be a good start.
Your drinking is certainly abnormal, and it sounds like what I think is a common scenario, in that you relate alcohol with relaxation. For me the trigger was finishing work and going home. I tried hypnosis, and will-power but in the end total abstinence became the only way.
If you know you need to quit, could you consider going to a treatment facility for your weeks off? Anyway, perhaps a very honest frank discussion with your doctor might be a good start.
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