83mama0f2

I guess what I meant was...ive read about people drinking a whole bottle or two a night regularly of wine and I believe a bottle of wine i actually 5 glasses. That was never something I did.. I know that 8-9 is more than a bottle of wine but in ky 15 years of drinking, 8-9 was only on a couple of occasions. 3-4 is typical drinking for me. That was my point.

advbike

Well re-read my post, that's all I ever drank, with rare exceptions. And it was still too much for me. It has almost ruined my life if I can be blunt. Even if the amount doesn't increase, the effects on the brain get worse over time. We start making bad decisions, and the quality of our life over the long haul basically comes down to the decisions we make. You've made a good one by trying sobriety. Give it a chance to work then re-evaluate if you must.

Dee74

I get you...but if 3 to 4 glasses was enough to cause you problems and get you here, that's cool too

Me? I waited, and put off doing anything until I was the multiple bottle guy - it wasn't a smart decision.

D

BSober1

Hi 83mama02, I agree with Dee! I drink like you...never before 4pm, never in the morning and usually only 3-4e glasses a nite, but there are other things to consider...even just this amount of drinking is holding me back...there is so much I mean to be doing in a day that I just don't get to it, because I am buzzed or drunk...I can't trust myself to do stuff when I am drinking, it changes my whole outlook and my responses are not the same as they are when I am sober... Also, when I drink the 1st one, I want more - to stop before being drunk is crazy hard and then I am always afraid of the hangover the next day...recently I am experiencing night sweats and insomnia. So, if you are here you need to be here - I think.

Dee74

do you kinda want someone here to tell you you don't have a problem 83mama?

D

Uninvited

It does sort of sound like you are trying to justify a reason to drink tonight. But maybe I misread you.

foolsgold66

It's your call. Drinking every night is not a habit of the majority of the adults on this planet.

Tang

And the other question I would have is this, why did you come seeking SR if you didn't think you had a problem? That's the question I've asked myself.

Dee74

Just to be clear my question was a genuine one 83mama - no aspersions being cast here

D

fishoutawatta

83 - That was my pattern. It was just that the number of drinks began to creep up. And my spouse began to notice more, and I began to realize how poorly I was treating my family, and myself. So I recognized I had a problem. I wasn't one of the "hard-core" folks we might see on the forum -- but a problem is a problem. And coming here is an indication that you and I realized that.

For me, it was time to make a change! And I've made through this, first, weekend -- a big deal for me! And I think my spouse has noticed -- also a big deal!

You can do it!

83mama0f2

No i don't want a reason to drink tonight, I'm just trying to figure out if moderation is possible for me someday or if I am doomed to be controlled by it forever. I know what would happen if I slipped. Id have one or two drinks the first night...2 or 3 the second night and after a weeks time id be up to 3-4 again. I know even that amount for my weight and height and the fact that I'm a woman is harmful. I just wonder if theres anything I can do to be moderate or if im truly doomed and am an alcoholic.

Carlotta

I think a better question to ask would be:
Does anyone here FELT like me when they drank?
I myself was a light weight as an active alcoholic. I did not lose anything, did not get sick, drank alone at home so no one knew, really did not drink as much as many>including non alcoholics!< (did not take me much) yet drinking affected me mentally in an horrible way and I came very close to killing myself. I don t compare how much I drank with others, I identify with the feelings.

ProgressNotPerfection

In my experience, normal people don't ask themselves "Do I have a problem with my drinking?" -- it never occurs to them. It isn't about how much or how long, but the effect it has on us - inside and out.

It is up to you to decide if you have a drinking problem, or if you are an alcoholic, or if you simply want to stop.

Perhaps you're acknowledging some unconscious realization that it has been a progression that you'd rather not continue?

If I could drink like a regular person...I'd drink all the time. Therein lies the paradox...

Dee74

I don't think you're doomed as an alcoholic at all - I'm not doomed...I'm very happy

I think you might be doomed tho if you were to continue doing something thats harmful to you

give not drinking a chance - at least a couple of months - you might find you don't miss it as much as you do at this early stage...you might even find you feel totally differently about not drinking then

D

83mama0f2

I think i also wanted to make sure I'm not the only one on this board that thinks they have a drinking problem and drinks the same amount I do.

83mama0f2

Thanks everyone. I really appreciate the support and input on this. I do recognize that the fact I think I have a problem means I probably do. I also had a ton of energy that first week and it felt so good, but now its wearing off and I think I'm maybe starting to get bored lol.

DoubleDragons

I used to be a fairly big partier and then when things got stressful I sometimes would drink wine to alleviate the feelings. Currently, I don't drink on the weekdays and I don't drink more than 3 glasses of wine on any weekend day. I have an app on my phone and I rigorously and honestly record my drinking. That being said, I am still considering quitting completely. It just feels like too much work and it is worrisome to constantly monitor myself. My mother has become a full blown alcoholic and I am very fearful of going down the slippery slope and becoming like her. My family and friends have always been big drinkers, so I really don't have a good idea of what normal is, but I think everyone has a point. If drinking were not a problem for you, would you even question it? That is what I am grappling with. Should I just nip it in the bud to be sure it will never become a big problem for me like it has for my mother? Good luck in your journey!!

honeypie

Hi 83Mama, I am a lightweight too and moderated my drinking to where I did not drink at all during the M-F week and then 1/2 bottle Fri, 1/2 bottle Saturday. That, my friend, is about 4 glasses of wine a week.

I know I am an alcoholic though.

It is my obsession, and my wanting to control it, and my "need" for it, and my looking forward to it, and my feeling crappy if I did overdo it once in awhile...those types of things made me feel "different" from others...others who seemingly seem just fine with daily drinking. Great! Let them!

I am the one who has to live inside my head and I am soooo tired of wondering if I have a problem or not. I never think about cigarettes. Ever. Why not? Because I don't smoke and am not addicted. Well, there are people who never think about drinking alcohol - or if they do, they think about it kind of whimsically but not the way I do. I'm tired of the see saw of "I'm normal, this is fun" and then waking up sometimes thinking "augh, this is not fun, and I am not normal."

Tang

I have 4 apps on my phone to count drinks. If that doesn't say it all, I don't know what does. I also have an app to count glasses of water. Control = problem.

EndGameNYC

Ha! Not laughing at any of your suffering, Tang, but your comment made me laugh. And I don't often laugh when I'm alone.

Do you also have an app that keeps track of your apps?