Boozehag double life...I want out!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: Brisbane Queensland
Posts: 2
Boozehag double life...I want out!
Hey all,
So I just googled forums and found this one and thought maybe id join for some support and help etc from those who live this life also.
I am a 27 year old wife and mother of 3 who lives a double fake life and I have had enough. I want out really seriously just want out! NO one around me knows the extent of my binge drinking I lie to everyone about it its horrible. Today I am seeing a councellor at 2pm which I hope helps also...for $190 he would want to be helpful lol.
does anyone else here binge drink lie and also have a problem with money? I also spend money .... large amounts of money and lie about it....then rouse my husband for spending to much! how horrible is that right!!??
the binge drinking is resulting in some seriously poor choices.... last night I got maggot drunk and a friend and I thought it would be a good idea to take a sheet of duramine!!! I mean hello idiot (that's me) what the hell was I thinking! I have 3 small children in bed on school holidays and I didn't sleep a wink and have spent the day crying and vomiting wanting to run away! my hubby works overseas so doesn't know any of this goes on as he is away over a month each time... its been great cause it makes me secret double life so much easier to maintain! but im soooo over this world, its not for me its not what I want however ive said and done this befor - how can I make this time be different!!??
I look forward to any help or support and even new quality friendships cause currently my world is to toxic to survive in.
nik xxx
So I just googled forums and found this one and thought maybe id join for some support and help etc from those who live this life also.
I am a 27 year old wife and mother of 3 who lives a double fake life and I have had enough. I want out really seriously just want out! NO one around me knows the extent of my binge drinking I lie to everyone about it its horrible. Today I am seeing a councellor at 2pm which I hope helps also...for $190 he would want to be helpful lol.
does anyone else here binge drink lie and also have a problem with money? I also spend money .... large amounts of money and lie about it....then rouse my husband for spending to much! how horrible is that right!!??
the binge drinking is resulting in some seriously poor choices.... last night I got maggot drunk and a friend and I thought it would be a good idea to take a sheet of duramine!!! I mean hello idiot (that's me) what the hell was I thinking! I have 3 small children in bed on school holidays and I didn't sleep a wink and have spent the day crying and vomiting wanting to run away! my hubby works overseas so doesn't know any of this goes on as he is away over a month each time... its been great cause it makes me secret double life so much easier to maintain! but im soooo over this world, its not for me its not what I want however ive said and done this befor - how can I make this time be different!!??
I look forward to any help or support and even new quality friendships cause currently my world is to toxic to survive in.
nik xxx
bona fido dog-lover
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: SF Bay area, CA
Posts: 99,759
to SR! You've come to a great place for support in quitting drinking. I'm glad you're seeing a counselor. I've been sober almost four years now and I credit my counselor and the people on SR for my sobriety.
I hope we can help you as much as this site has helped me.
Sober 21st Sept 2013
Join Date: Sep 2013
Posts: 6
Hi and welcome to SR Boozehag..You will find a lot of like minded souls here, I for one am a binge drinker and currently in recovery , Ive not started long and it has been very hard , but it gets easier with time.
Have a read through some of the forums, and see just how many people are in a similar situation to yours, theres a great big light at the end of the tunnel
Have a read through some of the forums, and see just how many people are in a similar situation to yours, theres a great big light at the end of the tunnel
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,372
welcome to SR Nik
I know you'll find support here.
Have you checked out our Class of September thread? It's for everyone who's quit or wants to quit this month
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...rt-6-a-16.html
D
I know you'll find support here.
Have you checked out our Class of September thread? It's for everyone who's quit or wants to quit this month
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...rt-6-a-16.html
D
Community Greeter
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Upstate New York
Posts: 51,526
Very happy to have you here Nik!
This is the best place ever for friendship, understanding, and support. We've all been through the same things & we know how it feels. You're never alone. Congratulations for wanting to make this big change in your life. We are with you.
This is the best place ever for friendship, understanding, and support. We've all been through the same things & we know how it feels. You're never alone. Congratulations for wanting to make this big change in your life. We are with you.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2013
Posts: 6,224
Welcome Nic. I'm Australian too and I arrived exactly as you did, by googling, that was six and a half sober months ago. Have a look at the September class thread where you'll meet a whole lot of people who are starting out on this great journey. http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...-part-6-a.html
Member
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: Hamilton, Ontario
Posts: 110
I'm only 18 days into this so I don't have much advice to give. I binged. I lied. I did stupid things. I felt painful guilt. What did I do right? Stopped drinking and found this forum. After that, good things started happening-- most importantly, I found I could function without numbing myself constantly.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: Long Beach, CA
Posts: 705
Hi Boozehag. I also was a nightly drinker with round the clock binges thrown in here and there for good measure. I thought I was fooling everyone, because I was a super-mom of three who was always the PTA President, Scout Leader,"fun mom"...sound familiar? I will tell you truthfully that your situation, if at all like mine, will get worse and worse. You will lose the love of your kids, spouse, family, friends and co-workers, as well as the respect you think you have earned by doing all of the "Mom of the Year" activities.
There is only one thing to do to save yourself and your family from ruin. Stop drinking. Don't waste any more time (I put it off until my kids were in their were in their early teens...the years I threw away were an enormous waste). It's been almost five years since I stopped, and I thank God every single day for this gift of sobriety. You can find this peace too, and it will be worth every bit of suffering and pain you go through to attain it.
There is only one thing to do to save yourself and your family from ruin. Stop drinking. Don't waste any more time (I put it off until my kids were in their were in their early teens...the years I threw away were an enormous waste). It's been almost five years since I stopped, and I thank God every single day for this gift of sobriety. You can find this peace too, and it will be worth every bit of suffering and pain you go through to attain it.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2008
Posts: 145
Hey there. I'm 28 also. If it were me I would tell my friends that I need some time to get myself together like a week or two. Get yourself a set schedule, bed time, etc. Get a routine going. Set a new way of life. Your self control will be tested very much if you have a friend coming around pressuring you to do what you have been doing for a while. Just get your head clear. imo.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2013
Posts: 223
Originally Posted by longbeachone 
Hi Boozehag. I also was a nightly drinker with round the clock binges thrown in here and there for good measure. I thought I was fooling everyone, because I was a super-mom of three who was always the PTA President, Scout Leader,"fun mom"...sound familiar? I will tell you truthfully that your situation, if at all like mine, will get worse and worse. You will lose the love of your kids, spouse, family, friends and co-workers, as well as the respect you think you have earned by doing all of the "Mom of the Year" activities.
There is only one thing to do to save yourself and your family from ruin. Stop drinking. Don't waste any more time (I put it off until my kids were in their were in their early teens...the years I threw away were an enormous waste). It's been almost five years since I stopped, and I thank God every single day for this gift of sobriety. You can find this peace too, and it will be worth every bit of suffering and pain you go through to attain it.
There is only one thing to do to save yourself and your family from ruin. Stop drinking. Don't waste any more time (I put it off until my kids were in their were in their early teens...the years I threw away were an enormous waste). It's been almost five years since I stopped, and I thank God every single day for this gift of sobriety. You can find this peace too, and it will be worth every bit of suffering and pain you go through to attain it.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: USA
Posts: 642
Welcome to SR.
What's worked so far this time for me (only day 7, so take this with a grain of salt), and made it feel *completely* different than past attempts to quit drinking is dwelling on what it's like the day after a drunk. Horrendous. I'd rather be bored out of my mind than ashamed, hungover, shaky, and sick (boredom was always a major trigger for me).
And guess what, today I did things I enjoy that I used to do while drunk and enjoyed them MORE! I actually felt joy cleaning my apartment and doing my laundry while I listened to reruns of "The Big Bang Theory" on TV. And then I played some video games (unthinkable a week ago without alcohol) while my dinner was cooking.
Also, I've been reading a recovery book, specifically "Under the Influence" which explains alcoholism from a physiological and psychological perspective. That's helped a ton.
What's worked so far this time for me (only day 7, so take this with a grain of salt), and made it feel *completely* different than past attempts to quit drinking is dwelling on what it's like the day after a drunk. Horrendous. I'd rather be bored out of my mind than ashamed, hungover, shaky, and sick (boredom was always a major trigger for me).
And guess what, today I did things I enjoy that I used to do while drunk and enjoyed them MORE! I actually felt joy cleaning my apartment and doing my laundry while I listened to reruns of "The Big Bang Theory" on TV. And then I played some video games (unthinkable a week ago without alcohol) while my dinner was cooking.
Also, I've been reading a recovery book, specifically "Under the Influence" which explains alcoholism from a physiological and psychological perspective. That's helped a ton.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: Australia
Posts: 11,351
I always said i will quit before my kids were teens, or at least old enough to see the ugly side of me.
Yeah right ! I was kidding myself. I wish i had found this place 10 years ago , before my kids hit their 20s !
Its NEVER too late to start Nik . I would love to save you 10 years you can NEVER get back.
Congrats on recognising you are in too deep ,and you are.
We cant get yesterday back and we havent got tomorrow yet ( if ever) so live for today.
You owe it to your beautiful family and to you too.
Much love and support
Wendy xx
Yeah right ! I was kidding myself. I wish i had found this place 10 years ago , before my kids hit their 20s !
Its NEVER too late to start Nik . I would love to save you 10 years you can NEVER get back.
Congrats on recognising you are in too deep ,and you are.
We cant get yesterday back and we havent got tomorrow yet ( if ever) so live for today.
You owe it to your beautiful family and to you too.
Much love and support
Wendy xx
Member
Join Date: Jun 2009
Posts: 123
Hey boozehag
I was a binge drinker and lied about it too. I hide it well. You made a point about seeking professional help. I did that and yes, it cost money, lots of it. I couldn't get honest with anyone about my drinking until I started talking to other people with drinking problems. I go to AA meetings daily and there is no better therapy in my opinion. Recovery is opening up another world. I lived the double life. You don't need to pretend, lie or be anyone other than one person, whether in public or private. No spinning the truth and no more ********. My poor choices were one of the factors that made me drink. Once you stop and admit you have a problem and take the steps to get help, you will see life gets easier and better daily. Good luck!
I was a binge drinker and lied about it too. I hide it well. You made a point about seeking professional help. I did that and yes, it cost money, lots of it. I couldn't get honest with anyone about my drinking until I started talking to other people with drinking problems. I go to AA meetings daily and there is no better therapy in my opinion. Recovery is opening up another world. I lived the double life. You don't need to pretend, lie or be anyone other than one person, whether in public or private. No spinning the truth and no more ********. My poor choices were one of the factors that made me drink. Once you stop and admit you have a problem and take the steps to get help, you will see life gets easier and better daily. Good luck!
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