Peace111

I grew up with an alchoholic mother and addicted father. Ive never felt comfortable with myself or life. I feel comfortable in a bar. I don't want to be comfortable in a bar. I want a normal lifestyle. But I do not know what that is. Can AA help me?
There is a beginners group on Thurs night. I want to go but I have a social anxiety about it. Im going to make this first step... I think

Coldfusion

Welcome, Peace111

Please get over any apprehension because AA can be very helpful at keeping you sober. A beginner's group or any meeting will be great.

digdug

You won't know if AA can help you unless you give it a try.

Beginners meetings are great. I still go to them. At least the ones I've been to, there has always been a great mix of people with a good amount of sober time (multiple years) and newcomers.

There are no rules for attending. Just a desire to stop drinking.

So just walk in and sit down. If you feel like talking to people, do it. If you feel like raising your hand and introducing yourself when they ask if it's anyone's first AA meeting, do it (this is highly recommended though). If you just feel like listening and not talking, you can do that to.

Dee74

It's outside my personal experience but I don't think there's any harm in checking it out Peace

welcome to SR

D

longbeachone

Gather up your strength and go. The hardest part will be walking through the door. For me, the best part of attending AA meetings is the immediate sense of finally belonging...feeling comfortable and accepted, warts and all. I found it to be enormously helpful in early sobriety.

This forum is not the place to debate the good/bad issues of different recovery groups. Each has strong and weak points, and if you are like most of us, you will discover which program works best for you. I can say without hesitation that belonging to a program can be a crucial element in your search for a sober life. It can be done without one, but I needed the input, experience, encouragement and camaraderie of a group.

Give it a try. I think you will enjoy it.

Mountainmanbob

awuh1

I would suggest you go ASAP. The longer you think about it the longer you will experience anxiety about going (not that there is any reason to be anxious, the people are just there to help one another). Go to the soonest available meeting if at all possible. I'll bet you a nickel you'll be glad you did.

cleansoberSean

This is sooo true. I went to my first meeting yesterday, a "Big Book" meeting. Since it was my very first meeting, a group of guy split off the main group with me and we had a small session. I got a welcome packet, and numbers of everyone who I could call if I was going to slip. I was going to wait to go to the beginner meeting later in the day, but I'm so glad I went ASAP. Still went to the beginner meeting later yesterday. I was shaking before my first meeting I was so nervous. Someone approached me outside while I waited to go in, and started talking to me, walked me in. It was great. I am super shy, but I wasn't when I walked in the door.

Mentium

Peace - you don't actually say that you have a problem with alcohol, but I assume you do or are worried you do. AA tends to be for people who have a problem, but they would be welcoming to anyone with a concern I am sure. They have all been to their first meeting and know how hard it is for people to walk in very often. I have never known them to be less than welcoming and gentle to a new arrival.

honeypig

Peace111, I understand that you can call your local AA central office and they will gladly send someone to pick you up and accompany you to your first meeting. There are AA volunteers who perform this service as part of their own commitment to recovery.

Might something like that be helpful for you? As others have said, you certainly wouldn't be the first or the last nervous newcomer to AA, and since the "first meeting assist" exists, you KNOW you're not the only one to need a little moral support getting there!

Wishing you strength in getting to that meeting. It's certainly worth checking out, at least as a starting place.

whiskeyman

You will not regret going.
I was terrified but it was the ONE thing that changed my life

Peace111

Yes I have a problem. I do not have to drink everyday, however on the weekends my friends always want to go to a bar. So I go saying I will just have one drink...then I end up drinking too much and doing something stupid...or not remembering. I need a life outside of this environment.

AlefVavResh

I can totally relate to the social anxiety. It took me two tries to get through the door at a beginners meeting. Now I've been going M-F for 2-plus weeks. I never thought I would go to AA daily, but it has been so helpful in my recovery, I look forward to going. I love the people and every meeting offers new discoveries. And I wasn't a joiner - believe me! . . . Introduce yourself when they ask if you are new. Then you can "pass" if you are not up to talking. No one ever pressured. me.

The only requirement is a desire to stop drinking. Doesn't matter if it is just once/week. Not being able to drink "just one glass", being embarrassed by your behavior, and having blackouts are a reason to want to stop, as you have already realized.

Good Luck!!

Bird615

This is exactly how it felt for me. I always say it was like coming home.

I am shy and reserved but I've found I could go into a meeting anywhere, even in another city, and it would feel like that.

Melina

I haven't tried AA this go-round with sobriety, but this thread is making me want to go for the fellowship!

I didn't mean to do a thread hijack, just wanted to share how inspired I feel!

Day 23 here and I think I need to add something to my sobriety arsenal.

Peace111, give it a shot and let us know how it went!

cleanandsoberSean, I'm VERY glad you went for some f2f support in light of your recent events. It sounds like you had a great experience. Great job!

Peace111

Hello! I ended up going to a NA meeting because a friend of mine runs NA meetings. So I guess my anxiety got the better of me as far as going alone goes. It was very difficult just the same . If I had a martini it would have been easier. But it was the same message Im an addict Im an alcoholic. Although I never well haven't done Narcotics in years (I do not like them) It still was a good message and I was warmly welcomed but I have the need to be able to relate more.. Im an alcoholic.
Next week Im going to go to and feel less anxiety about going to an AA beginners meeting!