Counselor and anxiety
Counselor and anxiety
I saw my counselor this morning. I am so nervous I just want to stay in bed, I have to work in a few minutes, I feel like I might freak out. Im not leaving my apartment until I get thirty days sober. No going out except to go to work.
My counselor says I am normal and most of this is in my head.
My counselor says I am normal and most of this is in my head.
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Join Date: May 2013
Location: Probably my living room. Maybe my bedroom if I'm feeling lazy
Posts: 1,085
Of course anxiety is in your head. It's a mental disorder, either genetically based or because of getting off the alcohol.
But that doesn't mean it's easy to control. You can't tell someone with Parkinson's to just stop shaking.
If your counselor said that with any kind of condescension or flippancy, this a major therapeutic no-no.
Please consider seeing a different counselor who can maybe give you some techniques to deal with this. Shutting yourself in your apartment will just leave you alone with the thoughts in your head. That's not a good thing.
Stay strong!
But that doesn't mean it's easy to control. You can't tell someone with Parkinson's to just stop shaking.
If your counselor said that with any kind of condescension or flippancy, this a major therapeutic no-no.
Please consider seeing a different counselor who can maybe give you some techniques to deal with this. Shutting yourself in your apartment will just leave you alone with the thoughts in your head. That's not a good thing.
Stay strong!
Yes I just finished my classes and I feel better. I told her I feel so nervous before teaching, but when it is over I feel better. I have been doing this for six weeks and I thought I would feel comfortable by now. Maybe I am scared about getting a job after grad school, or what move I want to make next in my life. My counselor (she) told me that I should divide my thoughts, that I have this self-destructive, scared side and a happy, healthy side. She said to say to the negative one, "we are not going to listen to you today, and we are not going to do anything like drink or smoke that is self-destructive." Maybe I will look for a different counselor, I don't know. I do have health insurance, which I specifically purchased so it covers mental health and alcoholism treatment, because I am TIRED of dealing with alcohol. Today I feel good, and my dad is not coming because his truck is too old and he cannot afford to drive that far. So yeah, my counselor told me to go to coffee shops and meet people there, or join a team of some kind.
I just want a friend and a female companion, I like talking to women more than men, and I find them more engaging, but I am all alone. That is my main reason why I keep relapsing, I just get so sick of being alone.
I just want a friend and a female companion, I like talking to women more than men, and I find them more engaging, but I am all alone. That is my main reason why I keep relapsing, I just get so sick of being alone.
coed volleyball sounds hot!
Yea I need to stay away from town because of all the booze, so I have to remain wary, but yes I do need to just ask some woman out one afternoon. Don't know why I am scared all the time, I wish I could shake this off.
Yea I need to stay away from town because of all the booze, so I have to remain wary, but yes I do need to just ask some woman out one afternoon. Don't know why I am scared all the time, I wish I could shake this off.
Holy cow, Ach used an exclamation point!
I still say get a nice looking dog. Dogs must be walked. Sit in park on bench with dog. Women stop to pet dog, instant excuse for beginning small talk....
One of many no alcohol involved ways to meet women.
I still say get a nice looking dog. Dogs must be walked. Sit in park on bench with dog. Women stop to pet dog, instant excuse for beginning small talk....
One of many no alcohol involved ways to meet women.
Member
Join Date: May 2013
Location: Probably my living room. Maybe my bedroom if I'm feeling lazy
Posts: 1,085
Are you still against the option of getting some support in AA? I know you had some bad experiences but not every group is the same. It's hard to feel alone with people there who care about you.
Even if you have to travel a bit of a distance to a new group, it might be worth it.
Even if you have to travel a bit of a distance to a new group, it might be worth it.
There is a young people's group that meets once a week. The big groups meet in the afternoons, so I think I will have to find one that meets around 4 or 5. I have the big book and I listen to speaker tapes, but I need a sponsor to help me complete the steps. But I have to read two books tonight, so I have to focus on school stuff.
That's why this is so difficult because I feel like I can't focus on recovery with the vigor and devotion that is necessary. But all I can do is try to learn and not wallow in self-pity. Tonight I am going for a walk/run though, that has been the most important thing to me to keep my mood stable: exercise. I am taking buspar for anxiety, but I cannot tell if it helps.
That's why this is so difficult because I feel like I can't focus on recovery with the vigor and devotion that is necessary. But all I can do is try to learn and not wallow in self-pity. Tonight I am going for a walk/run though, that has been the most important thing to me to keep my mood stable: exercise. I am taking buspar for anxiety, but I cannot tell if it helps.
Member
Join Date: May 2013
Location: Probably my living room. Maybe my bedroom if I'm feeling lazy
Posts: 1,085
Exercise is great!
Have you tried the young people's meeting? The local young people's meeting is my home group. It just feels more comfortable to be around people my age. And sometimes the huge meetings can be daunting.
Getting a sponsor is definitely a good idea.
I'm going to be straight with you. If you made it to a meeting every day, we're only talking 7 hours a week. Plus maybe a 10 minute phone call to check in with your sponsor every day and some step work, we're at about 10-12 hours a week.
Yes it's work, but it's not undoable, even with school and teaching. I have a very demanding job and I make it work because for me, it's sobriety or death.
You can do this. I know you can!
Finally, I don't know how long you've been on the buspar, but I think it takes a little while to kick in.
Have you tried the young people's meeting? The local young people's meeting is my home group. It just feels more comfortable to be around people my age. And sometimes the huge meetings can be daunting.
Getting a sponsor is definitely a good idea.
I'm going to be straight with you. If you made it to a meeting every day, we're only talking 7 hours a week. Plus maybe a 10 minute phone call to check in with your sponsor every day and some step work, we're at about 10-12 hours a week.
Yes it's work, but it's not undoable, even with school and teaching. I have a very demanding job and I make it work because for me, it's sobriety or death.
You can do this. I know you can!
Finally, I don't know how long you've been on the buspar, but I think it takes a little while to kick in.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2012
Posts: 3,777
There is a young people's group that meets once a week. The big groups meet in the afternoons, so I think I will have to find one that meets around 4 or 5. I have the big book and I listen to speaker tapes, but I need a sponsor to help me complete the steps. But I have to read two books tonight, so I have to focus on school stuff.
That's why this is so difficult because I feel like I can't focus on recovery with the vigor and devotion that is necessary. But all I can do is try to learn and not wallow in self-pity. Tonight I am going for a walk/run though, that has been the most important thing to me to keep my mood stable: exercise. I am taking buspar for anxiety, but I cannot tell if it helps.
That's why this is so difficult because I feel like I can't focus on recovery with the vigor and devotion that is necessary. But all I can do is try to learn and not wallow in self-pity. Tonight I am going for a walk/run though, that has been the most important thing to me to keep my mood stable: exercise. I am taking buspar for anxiety, but I cannot tell if it helps.
I do not think that your counselor is too far off with her words. The idea is to give that self destructive side minimal energy, as in no energy at all. This is where your focus with school comes in A. I think I am trying to paint a "lighter" picture here.
I tell myself something like this "Self, we have a lot of s#it to do today. You cant drink even if you wanted. Research paper, work, running, sleeping. There is no time for this self. " .......Then I carry on.
That's a great way to meet people. Plus you'll never feel lonely with a pet
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