Somebody Wake me When this is Over!
 

Had a tough week last week. Drank most of the day Monday, nothing Tuesday, drank heavy Wednesday, all day Thursday, nothing Friday, all afternoon and night Saturday, and a half pint on Sunday evening. Physically, I don't feel too terrible, but I'm an emotional wreck. I haven't exercised since last Tuesday, and exercise is such a benefit for me. I feel completely worthless, and my nerves are so on edge, that if I hear a pin drop I feel like I'm going to scream. Having that said, it was nearly impossible to be a good husband and father this weekend. Kids wanting to play, be silly, etc, made me feel like I was going to lose it.

I know if I get a few days under my belt that I can get my sobriety back, but starting out feels like trying to find the beginning of a circle. Lately, I don't know what to think. I don't have the emotional energy right now to invest in myself. I know I need to regroup and make a change, but I don't know where to turn. . .

Not that it helps much, but you're not alone. I'm right with you Ethos.

Just get the first day in and go from there. I'm in the same boat as you get some good sleep and exercise so you have the strength to start

You are investing a lot of your emotional energy currently by figuring out ways to drink and feeling bad about it afterwards. How about just re-applying some of it towards finding a way to NOT drink? Or maybe an AA or NA meeting? Maybe a call to a local addiction center or counselor? It sounds like you are spending a lot of time drinking too, maybe start by investing one of those drinking hours into a sober hour?

At this point the consequences of your drinking aren't registering anymore, so it's got to come from within.

Agreed. Going mountain biking after work today. I need to remember that the past is the past and move forward. It's a hard pill to swallow though.

You can do this. One day at a time you can rack up sober days until being sober is the normal way to be. :)