Dfaith999

I have been sober for almost nine months, after heavily abusing alcohol and klonopin. I did not fit into the twelve-step model of treatment, based on my personal beliefs, but I have been doing fairly well with therapy, naltrexone and anti-depressants.

I have found that dealing with the things I wanted to escape from with my substance abuse has been the most difficult part. I have few friends left, and am struggling in a relationship and with my family.

Luckily, I have maintained the outward appearance of a stable life: job, house, etc.

It is unlikely I will post very often, but I do find reading the experiences of others to be helpful.

pinkdog

Hi faith, welcome. Great job on 9 months. For me, sobriety is a journey. It is a continuous effort. Dealing with this issue, then the next one. Keep going. You will get to that sweet part of sobriety. The part where you have resolved enough issues to be peaceful. Good job.

MemphisBlues

Many of us that were caught in the booze-benzo trap find recovery hard. Trust me on that one. But if at nine months you are able to maintain you job and house, that is considered miraculous in my neck of the woods.

I'm at three years and can tell you that the relationships and other issues do get better, but it does take time.

Heck, at nine months I was concentrating on the walking, talking part.

I also balked at a 12 Step approach because of my beliefs, but at about six months sober I realized my beliefs had landed me in a pitiful place and opted to be open minded to see what I could learn from folks who were facing the same battle I was. For me, the only avenue open was AA and NA so I went and found incredible support. I still hold that my beliefs are far different from others, but I have grown to respect theirs.

Welcome to SR. It's a great place to hang.

Dfaith999

May I ask, what part of the twelve-step program appeals to you the most? Maybe I am misunderstanding how it all works. It seems to help a lot of people. I can identify with a higher power and all that, but I'm not sure about the rest of it.
Also, I am afraid of going to a meeting and not fitting in. There are meetings at noon every day near my work, and I have considered going but am very hesitant.

I know other people have many of the same issues I do, and that I am not unique in the addiction or in the struggles I have. I guess, just feeling rather isolated these days.

EndGameNYC

The AA Twelve Steps, as beautifully laid out in AA's Big Book, are described as a "design for living." You won't find anything in the Big Book about how to stop drinking. There is also nothing in there that suggests we stop drinking, though there are a few passages that encourage people who are uncertain of their own relationship with alcohol to try drinking under certain conditions.

I've never been a religious person, and "the God of my understanding" has nothing to do with religion. It starts with a leap of faith that there is a better way for me, and a commitment not to drink no matter what. Practicing the Twelve Steps has allowed me to recover from a hopeless state of mind and body, and has freed me from the obsession to drink. If you know my story, then you know I came back from a very dark place.

The process is not magic, nor is it mystical. It requires hard work to achieve sobriety, but I've realized many of the gifts that come with sobriety in my own life by putting in the work. I've seen hundreds of other people do the same thing.

AA doesn't tell anyone they should get sober; nor does it say that if people want to get sober, they should do it in AA. All the Big Book tells us is what people who've recovered from the bonds of alcoholism have done to achieve sobriety.

MemphisBlues

What appealed to me the most was having read the book and it's promise that there were others there who would help me. I needed help. And I also needed to see that recovery was possible. And I was alone.

I made great friends. I will admit that experiencing the physical and mental woes of protracted benzo withdrawal made it hard for others to relate to me, but I stuck to it.

I would recommend that instead of going to a noon meeting, perhaps hitting an evening one. It was the meeting after the meeting -- going out for coffee and getting to know others -- that helped me the most in my first few months. It's fellowship. I craved it and got it.

Dee74

Welcome to SR Dfaith

I hope you'll post regularly - this is a great community - lots of support help and ideas here

There's actually many different approaches and methods of recovery around - here's some links to some of the main players:

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...formation.html

I recommend you visit the Secular Connections forum if you think you may benefit from a non 12 step approach.

D

least

to the family! You might feel alone but you're not alone anymore. We are on this journey with you. I hope we can help you as much as this site has helped me.


I stay sober with the help of this site and my counseling sessions. It's been working for almost four years now.

FeenixxRising

Dfaith, I wouldn't worry about not fitting in. AA members come in all sizes, shapes and colors. They come from all social classes and all walks of life. Some are old, some are young, some are in between. Some dress in business attire, others attend in work uniforms, jeans, shorts or sweats. Some have tattoos and piercings, some do not. Some are well spoken, while others struggle a bit to get their thoughts out.

But all are treated with respect and all are welcome.

I too am hesitant about the 12-Steps, but I find solace in the meetings. I decided to attend and just keep an open-mind. So far no one has bitten me

I suggest attending a few meetings just to see what it's all about. If you don't like it you can always stop.