sponge

okay, after years of struggling to limit my alcohol concumption, i'll try again to quit for ever. This time I want an audience to support me, that's why I'm here.

My last years drinking pattern: one evening of drinking (way too much) followed by days (sometimes weeks) of not drinking... till I have a very good day, or a very bad day and this seems that makes me look for a drink... So stupid because on sober days, most of the time I find it very easy not to drink. It's like all of sudden it jumps on me...

Once I had a drink, it's very hard to quit...

I'm scared...

PippoRossi

Welcome, sponge! So glad you are here. We have all been where you are at right now. These forums have been a HUGE part of my sobriety and I can honestly say I couldn't have done it without all the support here.

lorelei

Welcome sponge, I know its scary but you're amongst friends, its so much easier not to pick up a drink than to stop, you can do this x.

hayley86

Welcome sponge, lots of support here. Glad you have joined us.

bridgeeboo2006

Im new to SR also. Day 4 sober..1st day here. I'm so scared too. Scared of how I'll b judged..scared I can't do it...scared I won't b fun anymore...scared of what I'll lose if I can't do it. SCARED sums up a lot of how I'm feeling to. We can do it..we have to believe. We are taking positive steps. Thanks for being brave too. We are obviously not alone.

HeadLump

Welcome to the family, Sponge! You've come to a great place

I started the way you are. I could take alcohol or leave it, but as soon as I took it, it was game over

That progressed until, years later, I was drinking 3-4 times a week and always to excess. Once I had that first glass of wine I was oblivious to everything - and everyone - else.

I'm now approaching 8 months sober and it has been much easier than I ever thought it could be. I know that if I refuse that first drink I'm fine. I remind myself that refusing the first is a hell of a lot easier than refusing the second. And to refuse a third would, of course, be nigh on impossible!

Stick with it, Sponge. The freedom you'll feel is amazing!

least

to SR! Giving up drinking is scary, but it's a worthy decision. My life is so much better sober I'll never go back to drinking. You can do this. There's a lot of support here.

sponge

Thx all... I know this is a supportive site, I'v been lurking around here before... I'll start counting again, day 1, and hope one (sober) day, I can welcome someone myself here, knowing that I'm sober for months.

firstymer

Good luck, sponge. I am glad you are here with us. We are all in this together.

pinkdog

Dear sponge, welcome. We are here. You came to the right place. Love and a hug to you.

lommey

glad your here sponge

Bird615

When I first stopped drinking, I seriously thought my life was over. I was at that point where I could not image my life with alcohol or without it.

But having enjoyed a long period of sobriety, I can tell you that life does get better. For me, it got better far beyond what I had ever dreamed of.

I'm here is because I took my sobriety for granted and stopped doing the things I need to do to keep it. It was remembering just how good I had it that brought me back to recovery.

Welcome to SR!

KDBnSLC

I've been a closet alcoholic for YEARS. It's nice to come here and "let it all hang out" without an ounce of judgement from anyone. In fact everyone here has walked in my same shoes...THEY UNDERSTAND. Come often, read often, post often, chat often. It's made the difference to me this time quitting.

jkb

Hi Sponge-

I was a lot like you also. One night of drinking ALOT followed by a day or week or whatever of sobriety. Then that "once in a while" started causing problems. It sucked because I figured I had it under control.

Glad your here.

Jess

Serenity1972

Hi Sponge - Welcome. I drank heavily on the weekends, but was able to abstain during the week (it probably had a lot to do with my job). So, I know what it is like to have many sober days only to have Friday roll around and rinse and repeat. Once I pick up the first drink it is over for me too. I can't moderate it. I don't think any of us that are here can and if there are some they are few and far between. I can understand you being scared. We have all been in your shoes. Stick around and read as much as you can. SR has been a huge factor in my recovery.

advbike

That was my pattern - quitting for some period of time then along comes a good day and I suddenly felt the urge to drink (and usually did). I finally figured out with the help of a psychologist that I have trouble dealing with my emotions (duh). I have a hard time moderating them and I also have some ineffective patterns of thinking, such as deep rooted feelings that I "don't deserve" to have good things happen to me. As a result, I have anxiety that results when they do, and the subsequent need to have a drink.

It helps me to be more in touch with my feelings so I know what's going on. Why am I anxious? Am I fearful, or lonely, or excited? Then when I (often) see that I'm in one of my old patterns of thinking I can let it go and accept things as they are. Suddenly the urge to drink goes down.

Hevyn

Glad to meet you sponge! I think it'll really help you to be here - it sure lessened my anxiety about letting go of alcohol. Yes, it's scary to stop - but scarier still to continue down that dangerous road.

Like Madbird, I never imagined my life without it. So I tried for years to use willpower to control the amounts I drank. It was a huge fail. In the end, it was much easier and less exhausting to just stop. To be honest, it had long since ceased to be fun or enjoyable. I always tried to find the old euphoria but it was gone & never coming back.

Congratulations on making this big decision to change your life. We know you can do it.

Dee74

Welcome sponge

It is scary, and I think most of us can identify with how you feel., This is a great community tho - you'll find a lot of support and ideas here

Do you have any kind of a plan to stay quit?
D