enembe

So, the first few days went by quickly, then the cravings suddenly hit me. I had a few rough days, but it's progressively getting better. I think I've determined the majority of my problem. First and foremost... I am just bored. I live at home with my parents, who have little to no expectations of me. I have a four year old soon, whom I do take care of with my parents help of financial support. They don't push me to get a job, hell, I've tried and my mom won't baby sit. I don't blame her, she's raised four kids, but I need help if I want to get some where. I personally feel for me that I could eventually get to the point of drinking every now and then, and it not being a problem. Of course that time is not now. I need to get my life together, have responsibility, address that responsibility and if once a month or two an event occurs where drinking is involved, I believe I could do that. Not having a job leaves me with zero motivation. I'm bored, I feel worthless, there for I drink.

Anyways, day 10. I can't believe how much thinner my face is even though I haven't even lost weight. I really wish I had taken a before and after picture. I've been waking up early every day, got my son on a better schedule, in genral I feel good over all. I still get cravings at a certain time every night. I feel like a few beers won't hurt, but I also realize that's delusional at this point. I used to stay up all night drinking because I really had no good reason not to. Yes, my son, but the easy excuse was he's fine with sitting around playing games and watching TV. Of course, that's horrible. He deserves a good mother and that's what I plan on giving him.

The drinking at another time in my life will be in a long while, if at all. It'll have to be a test run when I feel the time is right and if I still can't control myself at that point, then it's no alcohol. I know alcoholics run in the family, but there have been times in my life when things aren't the way they are now, even times where I was an die hard alcoholic and I quit for a month, then started drinking and was ok with only a few, had no desire to get wafted and didn't crave it the next day.

All the support b and stories I've been reading on here has really helped me the last ten days. So thank you, everyone. And I mean everyone.

Eleni58

"I was an die hard alcoholic and I quit for a month, then started drinking and was ok with only a few, had no desire to get wafted and didn't crave it the next day."

But then what happened to bring you to the point where you are now? It must have got out of control. Sorry, but true alcoholics will NEVER be able to drink in moderation. Until you accept that fact, you are setting yourself up for disaster. I hope you can learn to be happy and deal with life without needing or wanting alcohol. The sober life is so much better! Look at all the improvements you have experienced in 10 short days!

enembe

Just how boring my life is. If I had a job, I would be so tired, I wouldn't even want to drink. I only ever had one job before and when I was working, I was so tired I didn't even want to change my clothes before I went to sleep, let alone even think about alcohol. Everyone is different... I just feel I would personally be able to have an occasional drink once I get my life on a real track... Only trial and error will tell. I wouldn't let myself spiral downward.

Last time I started drinking heavily, I didn't even care how much, I didn't consider that I might have a problem. All I cared about was my weight. That's the only reason I quit. If the time does come that I believe I can occasionally have a drink, and it turns out that I can't, I will still be here, talking about it then. Even the first time I drink. I know what to look out for should it happen and I would put down the alcohol and give it up for good. I am resilient this time. This will not happen again to me.

Kaneda8888

Yay on day 10 ! Well done and keep it up. I wouldn't think too much about the future and whether you will continue drinking. Leave that thinking until the time comes and just focus on the immediate.

So, you're bored ? That may be a sign of inattentiveness to the present moment. Read up on the concept of mindfulness and being in the present. Even the most mundane task can become meaningful. It does take practice. There are many ways to keep yourself occupied other than a job. Take some time to relax your mind, accept your current situation and let it be open to possibilities outside of working.

Above all, take it easy and enjoy your sobriety in all matters, big and small !