I lied to my Dad...any info pls help
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: Midwest
Posts: 217
I lied to my Dad...any info pls help
My Dad came by to give me my mail and I asked him for some $$ yes, to buy a bottle and he said..u know Amy, I had a few friends that went to the hospital for a couple months and came out ok...I told him it was for food and to help my relapse...if I go, I loose my job, my cat is 13 years old...and school what about that? they say I have a high IQ can't tell...does anyone know about if you do go to treatment about student grants/loans in US???
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Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,380
MN I'm not in the US but I'm sure someone on your campus would know about widrawing for courses for health reasons - is there a counselling area?
I'm sure your dad would look after your cat too.
As for your job - I'm outta the loop, hows your relations with your boss?
I think you need to do something here, for sure.
D
I'm sure your dad would look after your cat too.
As for your job - I'm outta the loop, hows your relations with your boss?
I think you need to do something here, for sure.
D
Member
Join Date: Dec 2012
Posts: 414
Amy, you can look into outpatient treatment programs that you may be able to schedule around your classes, allowing you to continue school. If your username is descriptive, Hazelden is one of the best facilities in the nation and they have treatment centers around MN.
Regarding student loans, you generally must begin repayment six months after you are no longer a full time student. There are ways to file for payment deferment, however, so you should consider contacting your student loan lenders for information about those options.
My understanding is that you cannot be fired for seeking addiction treatment, as long as you inform your employer. It is considered a disability, and you are protected.
If recovery is what you want, you need to make it your first priority. Your school and more importantly your life will suffer if you continue on your current path. You can do this - we are all pulling for you!
Regarding student loans, you generally must begin repayment six months after you are no longer a full time student. There are ways to file for payment deferment, however, so you should consider contacting your student loan lenders for information about those options.
My understanding is that you cannot be fired for seeking addiction treatment, as long as you inform your employer. It is considered a disability, and you are protected.
If recovery is what you want, you need to make it your first priority. Your school and more importantly your life will suffer if you continue on your current path. You can do this - we are all pulling for you!
Member
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Atlanta
Posts: 31,179
MN - I'm not totally sure, but I have student loans and due to the fact that I make a very low salary, I actually don't have to pay anything back at this point (graduated earlier this year) but I am paying. There are ways to defer the loan.
Thing is - call them, talk to them and be upfront. You probably don't have to tell them it's an addiction thing but just mention you need medical care? I'm not really into lying, but when it comes to survival...well, you gotta do what you gotta do. Honestly, they probably wouldn't have a problem if you were honest.
Would your dad or someone else take your cat? I totally get that - got 2 of my own and they are my babies.
As far as having a high IQ? I have no idea what mine is, but I entered college in my sr. year of high school, have 3 degrees, and I STILL became an addict. I had to hit a pretty low bottom (losing my cats I had at the time which I'm still working on forgiving myself for) and have 6+ years in recovery.
I got clean and had a HUGE amount of financial issues to deal with. I found out that talking to the people and being honest (in my case) actually helped. I don't know about the student loans, but I do know that I've seen numerous statements on the site that if you are having problems, call them.
Trust me - ignoring or thinking "I'll take care of it later?" NOT a good thing, as I had a whole lot of "later" stuff to take care.
You can do this, you deserve it as does your furbaby.
Hugs and prayers,
Amy
Thing is - call them, talk to them and be upfront. You probably don't have to tell them it's an addiction thing but just mention you need medical care? I'm not really into lying, but when it comes to survival...well, you gotta do what you gotta do. Honestly, they probably wouldn't have a problem if you were honest.
Would your dad or someone else take your cat? I totally get that - got 2 of my own and they are my babies.
As far as having a high IQ? I have no idea what mine is, but I entered college in my sr. year of high school, have 3 degrees, and I STILL became an addict. I had to hit a pretty low bottom (losing my cats I had at the time which I'm still working on forgiving myself for) and have 6+ years in recovery.
I got clean and had a HUGE amount of financial issues to deal with. I found out that talking to the people and being honest (in my case) actually helped. I don't know about the student loans, but I do know that I've seen numerous statements on the site that if you are having problems, call them.
Trust me - ignoring or thinking "I'll take care of it later?" NOT a good thing, as I had a whole lot of "later" stuff to take care.
You can do this, you deserve it as does your furbaby.
Hugs and prayers,
Amy
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: Midwest
Posts: 217
Thanks for the support as always..feel like a broken record. My dad is allergic to cats and is "old school" so he is just like..."it's a cat, whatever" went to all my classes today...picked up my paycheck and yeah, bought a bottle, a small one, then went back for another small one...but done after tonight...have to be....class at 8 am, and I did talk to the school, no refunds and will be blocked from further grants/loans as this is not the first time I have messed up...I started at 18...I'm 40 now...so, going to make myself sleep so I don't drink this bottle and go to class in AM and be done..I was, as I said, feeling so good.....don't know why I am having such a hard time now.....was in double digits of being sober, now it seems like crack??? Thanks again.....trying, don't know what the heck is wrong with me???
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: Midwest
Posts: 217
Originally Posted by CharlieNoogan 
Amy, you can look into outpatient treatment programs that you may be able to schedule around your classes, allowing you to continue school. If your username is descriptive, Hazelden is one of the best facilities in the nation and they have treatment centers around MN.
Regarding student loans, you generally must begin repayment six months after you are no longer a full time student. There are ways to file for payment deferment, however, so you should consider contacting your student loan lenders for information about those options.
My understanding is that you cannot be fired for seeking addiction treatment, as long as you inform your employer. It is considered a disability, and you are protected.
If recovery is what you want, you need to make it your first priority. Your school and more importantly your life will suffer if you continue on your current path. You can do this - we are all pulling for you!
Regarding student loans, you generally must begin repayment six months after you are no longer a full time student. There are ways to file for payment deferment, however, so you should consider contacting your student loan lenders for information about those options.
My understanding is that you cannot be fired for seeking addiction treatment, as long as you inform your employer. It is considered a disability, and you are protected.
If recovery is what you want, you need to make it your first priority. Your school and more importantly your life will suffer if you continue on your current path. You can do this - we are all pulling for you!
Member
Join Date: Dec 2006
Posts: 352
Amy...there is nothing wrong with you, you are an addict, just that simple. That doesn't make you a bad person, just a person with an addiction, which is sad, but fixable. Alcohol, crack, heroin, it doesn't matter, addiction is addiction, whether its legal or not...so, please stop beating yourself up about it, just start accepting the addiction for what it is, and begin dealing with it beginning with not picking up that first drink... You are a smart person, obviously, but this addiction doesn't care if you are smart, rich, talented, gifted, homeless, whatever..Addiction takes everyone it can, unless its stopped.. Please come here and post Before picking up, and during those times Alcohol is crying out for you..
12-Step Recovered Alkie
Join Date: May 2010
Location: West Bloomfield, MI
Posts: 5,797
From what I've experienced with people coming out of treatment centers......and there are two VERY good ones within about an hour's drive from my place in Michigan (Maplegrove and Brighton), their success rates are almost to the person the same as the % of people who become active in some sort of after-care group - AA, for example. I can't tell you how many dozens (100's maybe) of people I know who went to this or that recovery center, learned a lot, but for whom sobriety only became a reality based upon what they did AFTER rehab. Every single one of them, upon getting some decent time under their belt talks about how nothing was different about trip # 3, or 5, or 7 or whatever......but that what made a difference this time around was what they did starting the day they LEFT treatment.
I'm sure there are people who went to a facility, did their 28 days or whatever, never did anything beyond that and are fine to this day. Their numbers, from what I've seen, are limited. So taking that into account, you're in luck. It seems that, just like in the "olden days" before insurance/government funded treatment center stays, a hospital stay (usually for a handful of days) to get past the near-fatal nature of withdrawal from alcohol may be all that's recommended to make a start. Then, you can get yourself into any of the free after-care programs. If you have even 2 sick-days or vacation days available, you could go in this friday and be back to work tuesday.
I'm sure there are people who went to a facility, did their 28 days or whatever, never did anything beyond that and are fine to this day. Their numbers, from what I've seen, are limited. So taking that into account, you're in luck. It seems that, just like in the "olden days" before insurance/government funded treatment center stays, a hospital stay (usually for a handful of days) to get past the near-fatal nature of withdrawal from alcohol may be all that's recommended to make a start. Then, you can get yourself into any of the free after-care programs. If you have even 2 sick-days or vacation days available, you could go in this friday and be back to work tuesday.
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Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: Pennsburg, Pa.
Posts: 389
I've been reading all this thread....as someone of the age of almost 61, who has struggled
with an alcohol addiction for many years...I'm throwing in my 2 cents. The one thing, that has helped me more than anything, even AA, or avrt, is meditation. I learned "Actualism"
in NYC years ago, at one of their centers. You can even practice on-line. The more you practice, the better you get. It sort of self-teaches you let go of, and process thoughts, such as cravings, that are "low level". Just a suggestion !
with an alcohol addiction for many years...I'm throwing in my 2 cents. The one thing, that has helped me more than anything, even AA, or avrt, is meditation. I learned "Actualism"
in NYC years ago, at one of their centers. You can even practice on-line. The more you practice, the better you get. It sort of self-teaches you let go of, and process thoughts, such as cravings, that are "low level". Just a suggestion !
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Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: Somewhere in Wisconsin
Posts: 661
MN, I was supposed to start college in early July. I am 55 years old and unemployed. Once I made the decision to quit drinking, I decided to "defer" my education until I was completely sober for at least a couple months. I have been sober for 53 days now and start college on October 7.
Your recovery should be your main and only job at this point seen as how you are having a rough time staying sober. You can always go back to school down the road. It's never too late.
Your recovery should be your main and only job at this point seen as how you are having a rough time staying sober. You can always go back to school down the road. It's never too late.
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Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: Midwest
Posts: 217
Originally Posted by foolsgold66
You asked for help and here it is. I'm going to be very frank with you. You may call me names or take me to task if you like. You don't want to be sober badly enough. That's what is wrong with you.
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Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: Midwest
Posts: 217
Originally Posted by Eleni58
MN, I was supposed to start college in early July. I am 55 years old and unemployed. Once I made the decision to quit drinking, I decided to "defer" my education until I was completely sober for at least a couple months. I have been sober for 53 days now and start college on October 7.
Your recovery should be your main and only job at this point seen as how you are having a rough time staying sober. You can always go back to school down the road. It's never too late.
Your recovery should be your main and only job at this point seen as how you are having a rough time staying sober. You can always go back to school down the road. It's never too late.
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Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: Midwest
Posts: 217
Originally Posted by Dee74
You need to do something different MN. There's been so many suggestions made to you over the course of your time here.
If you keep doing the same thing, you'll get the same results.
D
If you keep doing the same thing, you'll get the same results.
D
2
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Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: Midwest
Posts: 217
Originally Posted by raku
I've been reading all this thread....as someone of the age of almost 61, who has struggled
with an alcohol addiction for many years...I'm throwing in my 2 cents. The one thing, that has helped me more than anything, even AA, or avrt, is meditation. I learned "Actualism"
in NYC years ago, at one of their centers. You can even practice on-line. The more you practice, the better you get. It sort of self-teaches you let go of, and process thoughts, such as cravings, that are "low level". Just a suggestion !
with an alcohol addiction for many years...I'm throwing in my 2 cents. The one thing, that has helped me more than anything, even AA, or avrt, is meditation. I learned "Actualism"
in NYC years ago, at one of their centers. You can even practice on-line. The more you practice, the better you get. It sort of self-teaches you let go of, and process thoughts, such as cravings, that are "low level". Just a suggestion !
Member
Join Date: Sep 2013
Posts: 350
Health, help, healing and hope!
Originally Posted by MN81713
Should have done that!! Now tuition and books paid, leave, loose all... I will if I have too but going to try to make it work!
The only wrong way to deal with an addiction is not to.
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