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Old 10-03-2013, 08:03 AM
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Welcome,

You're doing a great job actually.

stay busy, take care of body and mind, forgive yourself
(my most powerfull recovery tools)

SR is a wonderfull community and you will find lot's of support here.
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Old 10-11-2013, 05:57 PM
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Day 47. Two nights ago, i finally had a restful and good nights sleep. I initially thought it was a fluke, but it happened again last night, so it must be real... Praise the Lord! It took 45 looong nights for my sleep to get back to normal.

Now, that i have my sleep back the biggest test is to stay clean. At first you quit because you realize you have a problem, but after you think you beat the addiction by detoxing, you start to convince yourself that you dont have a problem and that you can control it. So you start to think that it wouldnt hurt to use again. I know this because this is my third time quitting cannabis... and ive witnessed myself going down that slippery slope before.

I had my first big test last week when I visited a friend out of town and he offered me a smoke. Its possibly the best feeling in the world when you have absolutely no desire to smoke after being addicted for so long.

I hope to keep this resolve for the rest of my life. You all have been so great and inspiring to me at a difficult time in my life. Im going to stick around this forum and hopefully ill be able to add something benificial to the conversations. Thank you all!
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Old 10-11-2013, 08:17 PM
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Glad to hear you're sleeping better. Things will just keep improving from here on out.

Congrats on 47 days!! You're doing great.
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Old 10-13-2013, 02:50 PM
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Ok, im totally not in the clear yet... i thought the insomnia was over but it comes back now and then. And now depression is getting worse.

One day i feel great, the next i feel down. Bit hey that's what we signed up for right? No pain no gain!

Cravings came back today...Still fighting this monster.
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Old 10-13-2013, 05:03 PM
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I felt pretty depressed and unmotivated the second month off of weed. Now I'm at 88 days and that has gotten a lot better.

Exercise and eating well will help some. Hang in there. It will get better.
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Old 12-25-2013, 03:38 PM
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122 days. Man i didnt think this was possible. I remember feeling trapped in addiction and not feeling normal unless i had some type of substance flowing through me. It took so much will power to finally quit. It takes a lot of will power to stay quit as well.

I stopped seeing my old friends, who i used to get high with. I realize that im probably going to have to keep it that way unless they also decide to quit one day.

In the beginning of my quit it helped immensely to be surrounded by family, and getting their support. I hang out with my family most of the time now. I never really got to appreciated them because i was always either high all the time, or trying to find drugs while coming down from a high. Ive also surrounded myself with sober people, just to be around their pure energy, hoping that somehow itll rub off on me. Happiness is pretty contagious.

Nowadays im feeling pretty good for the most part. I drink herbal teas whenever im feeling tense. Its amazing how tea has a calming effect on me. On another note, i cant drink coffee like i used to. If i drink a cup of black coffee ill get super anxious. Im really wierded out by that, because ive been drinking coffee since i was 16, i should be used to it by now, right?? Also, if i have something sugary like a cookie, ill get really tired an hour later. I find that eating a fruit will revitalize me after feeling sluggish, and the energy will be sustained all day. Its kinda funny, being on drugs for the past 6 year has kept me from being aware of my bodily processes. But im glad that i quit when i did. It feels good to be back to reality!
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Old 12-25-2013, 03:55 PM
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I'm glad you're doing well - congratulations!

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Old 12-31-2013, 01:57 PM
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thank you Dee74!
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Old 12-31-2013, 02:08 PM
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Originally Posted by IfGodWillsIt View Post
My anxiety and depression are through the roof
As soon as I read the title of the thread, I instantly thought to myself, "Man, that combination would give someone the worst anxiety attack of all time."

Anxiety is a tough thing to deal with. And the insomnia dissipates over time. It gets easier. I assure you. I will admit: The initial few months of the soberiety/recovery process are indeed difficult.

It IS doable though.
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Old 12-31-2013, 05:25 PM
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Squizz, thanks for the encouragement! Yea, the worst of my anxiety came within the first week. It built up until I actually had my first ever panic attack that landed me in the hospital at my one week mark.

Since then, the anxiety has subsided. It's not completely gone, but it's become manageable. I notice my anxiety getting at it's worst whenever I feel alone, with no one to confide in. Especially when I feel the helpless urge to call a friend and vent, that's when my anxiety kicks in and prevents me from doing something I used to love doing; socializing.

I'm confident that this will pass, I just have to be patient. I've read a few success stories involving people who've gone through similar experiences, and I'll say, this site is truly a blessing!

My insomnia is completely gone now, thank GOD! It subsided sometime after 2 months into recovery. The fact that my insomnia is no longer an issue is evidence for me that all my negative feelings and emptiness will pass as well.

I love you all. Keep fighting the good fight!
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Old 08-22-2014, 05:02 PM
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It's been a long while since I've posted anything on here. So, I thought I should come back and share a bit of my journey in the spirit of giving back and contributing to the community - since the only way I could get through my horrible withdrawals was to flip through and read about so many success stories that have been shared on this wonderful forum. But, before I begin, I'd like to say that you are all my heroes and all your stories helped me to get to where I'm at today, in my recovery.

Today is my 362nd day of being sober. How's my life? Well, I feel healthy and that's really all that matters to me. As long as I have my health, I feel like the luckiest person alive . Yea, I can't lie, some days might get really boring living without drugs, but hey I figure that's how life gets sometimes - just gotta make an effort to entertain yourself in healthy ways, or just tough out the boredom and wait until something exciting comes up.

These days, I feel more confident than ever. I used to hate being around people and I would much rather have been getting high all by myself. But these days, I find myself really enjoying the presence of others - ultimately, I feel more human. I remember the weed hangovers, and generally just feeling like a zombie. I used to live on autopilot, dreading the task of going on throughout the days as fast as I could, mentally planning and waiting for my next high.

Now I feel more in control over my life and decision making. I also feel more in control of my conversations with others. Whereas before I used to be passive and reactive, especially when it came to communicating with others, now I feel active and proactive. I can't express how much my life has improved without drugs running through my brain - both literally and figuratively.

The things that really helped me get through my worst withdrawals involved staying physically active. I would try to get outside the house as much as I could. During the first 4-6 months I didn't want to see or talk to anyone, so I mostly partook in lonely activities; like going to the batting cages and teeing off at my local golf range. Some days, I would feel like complete and utter crap, and didn't feel like making an effort to drive anyplace so I would force myself out of the house and just walked around the neighborhood; I swear just walking outside and taking in all the fresh air helps boost your mood a little bit when you're depressed.

I've always wanted to learn how to play the guitar, and so when the time came to where I dedicated my life to being sober I bought myself a guitar. Now after a year, I can play and sing to my hearts content. Picking up an instrument, especially if you're into music, is a great way to fight boredom.

Just stay occupied. That's the best advice I can give anyone who's going through this sobering journey. And PLEASE PLEASE, don't give up! Life gets better

Love,

IfGodWillsIt
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Old 08-22-2014, 05:06 PM
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That's fantastic!! Great post!!
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Old 08-22-2014, 05:50 PM
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Originally Posted by IfGodWillsIt View Post
Its day 31 for me since my last joint. My anxiety issues have gotten a lot better, but the problem i face now is that im pretty irritable. Im also on the verge of relapsing because im so bored all the time. I really need some encouragement right about now...
going through the same, an extreme pot head, and whole career was based on it. Im 6 days clean and now that i am going through things w my partner I am very irritable and mad and angry. It gets tough but I won't let up for one second, we got this man!!
When I say extreme pot head I mean XTREME!
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Old 08-22-2014, 08:13 PM
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Inspiring! I was so glad to hear that you're still at it!
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Old 08-22-2014, 08:20 PM
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Congrats! I haven't smoked a joint in 7yrs.I totally get what you say when you mentioned that you know you beat it when someone offers to smoke with you, and you turn them down.

I once had it so bad that if I was out, I would spend hours looking around the house for roaches. Just to have enough to break em down and roll a pinner. lol

My dh still smokes occassionally. The smell of his clothing literally knocks me down. I can't believe I actually went around smelling like that for years.

It's nothing that I miss. Thank goodness. I'm happy for you that your life has gotten better. Sounds as if you've grown up. Feel blessed. A lot of people stay in that lifesyle most of their lives. What a waste,to go through our whole lives a pothead.
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Old 08-23-2014, 07:43 AM
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Thanks for the update. Glad to hear you're doing so well!! Congrats on 1 year!!
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Old 08-23-2014, 07:34 PM
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Originally Posted by CharlesG View Post
going through the same, an extreme pot head, and whole career was based on it. Im 6 days clean and now that i am going through things w my partner I am very irritable and mad and angry. It gets tough but I won't let up for one second, we got this man!!
When I say extreme pot head I mean XTREME!
Hey brother, meditation helped me tremendously in my most irritable moods. Let natural light in your house, and open a window to let fresh air flow. I would sit on the floor, close my eyes, and try my best to picture the universe in all it's vastness and glory - somehow it would make my problems feel smaller, at least for that 10 minutes of meditative stillness.

The best times to do this are right at sunrise and then again at sunset.

I was a serious stoner, addicted to high grade for 5 years. I'll take a meditation high over a spliff any day.

Stay fighting,

Peace
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Old 08-23-2014, 07:46 PM
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Originally Posted by autumn2 View Post
Sounds as if you've grown up. Feel blessed. A lot of people stay in that lifesyle most of their lives. What a waste,to go through our whole lives a pothead.
I kept getting this intuition, a gut feeling telling me, "If I don't quit now, I'll never stop." Fighting an addiction definitely builds character, and kind of forces you to grow up. Thanks for the encouragement! And wow, I can only hope to achieve 7 years of sobriety. You're awesome!
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