bowder68

I'm about 50 days in. The desire to drink is not a problem - for now.
But forthe past two weeks I have been so short of temper, constantly irritated and angry. I'm exercising like a fiend daily to relieve stress, etc. This sucks! Suggestions?

ShaneM1

Their is a vitamin that's called HTTP 5 that I take that really helps with with my anger.

Happier

Not sure of the solution but know it is very common. I was the same way.
If you can't pinpoint the true source of your anger/irritation then maybe just try to minimize the damage and give it some more time. That eventually worked for me. No fun along the way though.

seahorse661

I worked on my anger through therapy. I looked for the sources of it, examined if the anger was justified (in many cases it wasn't) and once I understood it it was easier to let go.

Exercise is great to relieve stress and I use it too but I also needed to understand it before I could move on

Nuudawn

Shane may be onto something here. 5THP falls under the amino acid therapy rather than a vitamin. 5HTP actually aids in the assistance of serotonin production which is part of our "feel good" system. When low in serotonin we are deficient in the area of feelings of calm and well being and often have trouble sleeping and are prone to irritability.

Without a doubt, addiction is indicative of messed up brain chemistry and often it is our serotonin and dopamine neurotransmitters that are primarily compromised.

There is so much going on when we are withdrawing from the ways we have artificially stimulated and controlled our brain chemistry.

Nevertheless, I would maybe talk to my doc about what you are feeling.

rowd44

try listen to music. That seems to really help me get my mood in a better place; then I read something that inspires me. Just getting away on your own for a little bit - I know what a busy career and kids looks like and am 47 days sober so I feel the same...take care

hypochondriac

It's totally normal bowder. I spent a lot of time early on googling anger management. There are no quick fixes but it turns out that a lot of it was tied up with my sense of entitlement which I believe is common with alcoholics. It's the stage where we stamp our feet saying it's not fair... x

mecanix

For me i was getting more and more wound up at about the 6 week mark . I had to let it go and de-construct it .

Someone cut me up in traffic i used to flip into a tazmanian devil ...

So the first thing to do was take a deep breath , untence my body , back off , take the foot of the accelerator ,
realize that that person who did this thing is probably sitting in their own pile of resentments and is angry about something ,
there is no reason for me to pick up some of their resentment and anger and for it to spoil my day and wind me up .

Back off, calm down , relax your body and drop it ...

Other people are daft , mad , bad and angry do i let it get to me and upset me or do i just think J*rk and get on with having a good day myself .

Bestwishes, m

nomis

Awesome advice. Addiction is all about being unable to properly regulate stress, levels of which for the addict, can often cause trauma to the brain.

Recognizing the stress, where it's coming from, and whether it's rational or not is essential in eventually learning how to regulate it. It's a tough chore, I'm struggling myself, but I know that doing that is absolutely key to my recovery.

I also recommend trying meditation.

GracieLou

Oh yes, same here. The anger came out of the woodwork like roaches. I wanted to scream and punch things. I have been angry before but not like that.

I realize now it was all that pent up hurt and resentments. The dam was opening and I had two choices, release it or close it again by drinking. I chose to release it. I started writing.

I opened Word and started typing. I started typing out my life story. It was all over the place and bad but I got it out. Many times while furiously snapping the keys things became clear to me. Stuff I had forgotten about came rushing out. Feelings I had as a kid came flowing out. Everything just poured out on to the screen. At times I was crying so bad I could not see but I kept typing. I did not correct spelling or punctuation, I just typed.

This helped me later to go over my resentments. Many were right there in what I typed.

Try getting it out but take a break. Breathe and get some air now and then but don't think to hard or try and focus to hard. Just let it flow. It helped a great deal to get it out.

bowder68

Great advice folks! It feels better just knowing others are going through the same feelings. Last night I chose to just go to bed and read before to get away from my family. Recovery is really strange. I feel, for now, that I need to be alone to keep from lashing out to others yet I've always been extroverted. One day at a time!

Happier

Good strategy. I often politely got away by myself when I felt my frustration building up within me. Exercise or a walk did wonders! Figured I was doing everyone a favor and that it often kept me from saying or doing something that may be hurtful. I kept reminding myselfto stay calm and minimize the damage as I work through these things. It slowly got easier and better I my case although I still have work to do.
I now am now working on finding and developing love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, and faithfulness. A tall order indeed, but a worthy goal, IMO.

Glad you are feeling better.

Impurrfect

bowder - I've been in recovery for crack addiction and codependency for over 6 years. Had my ups and downs, but it's been quite cool for a while.

A little over a month ago, I quit smoking cigarettes. OMG, I turned into an evil b***h. I was angry, on edge, you name it. I joined back in the nicotine forum here (have been there several times, sad to say).

My job brings about a lot of stress (I work with clients who have alzheimers). That, alone, can stir up a lot of feelings of frustration, helplessness and yes, anger.

What has helped me is venting on SR. I've also found out that *I* can take a time out. If my one client is pushing every button I have? I walk away. Out of sight, with him, leads to out of mind until I come back. I found a support group of others who deal with similar situation (thank you SR for teaching me about forums!!!!)

Exercise is great, but there are times we need more mental support. I also volunteer at a local sr. center, serving lunch and I am SO appreciated and loved, the times I can go make my day. I would have never thought of volunteering had it not been for the great folks here. I can be furious at the world, or me and my bad decisions, but when I go there (and several know my history), I feel love and it makes a world of difference.

I totally snapped on my dad, one night, and finally said "I quit smoking, dammit, and I'm P***SED". He is a former smoker and just said "okay, I get it".

You've gotten a lot of good suggestions from people who have btdt. Some feelings are just hard to go through with getting numb, but guess what? We learn to get through them all on our own and I promise you...THAT is an amazing feeling

Hugs and prayers,

Amy

duane1

At 50 days, I still was suffering quite a bit from mood swings, anger..... I am up around 16 months now and I have really calmed down over time. I'm still not where I want to be, but I am getting much closer. Give it time. Work on it. Let things go. Exercise will definitely help. It takes time, but it also takes recognizing triggers and figuring out how to deal with it before it festers.

LadyinBC

It is not uncommon to feel like this. When losing our poison it is not uncommon to go thru a greiving process.

This is what this could be. I felt like I was losing my best friend when I gave up the booze. I was angry I couldn't drink anymore, angry others could etc. I was irritated and very resentful.

You will get thru this!

EndGameNYC

In early sobriety, I was angry at what I'd done to myself, and angry that the only way for me to live a safe and sane life was to give up the very thing that made me miserable in the first place, and then for many years.

We are creatures of contradictions; alcoholics are most contradictory.

bowder68

So true End Game - so true!!

Mentium

I guy whipped into the parking space I was about to park in at the supermarket yesterday. I opened my car window and yelled at him. He was very much in the wrong, but frankly I felt murderous! Way over the top!

I suspect some of us are feeling real emotions for the first time in years when we get sover. They probably veer a bit and come out rather more strongly than they might otherwise. I'm just trying to be patient and to wait for some sort of normailty to arrive. I can wait. It is better than life with alcohol by a mile!

foolsgold66

Give it time. I used to get angry at stuff like that. Think about who it really hurts when you get mad at things beyond your control...