Hooped

I received the dreaded ultimatum from my partner last night and also, probably more importantly, from myself.
I'm retired and I've basically been on somewhat of a bender since March.
A couple of beers an hour, all day long.
I've lately been cracking a beer as soon as I open my eyes in the morning
and usually have about 4 before even having a coffee...just to calm my nerves of course.
Friends have been wispering to my partner.. asking her if I've been drinking, and ...this is like at 9am.
I'm sick of it.
What a horrible disease this is.
Anyway, I'm back.

ReadyAtLast

welcome back hooped

Dee74

good to see you Hooped

what else are you doing for your recovery besides re-joining us?

D

Hooped

Dee....wonderful to hear from you again sir.
Presently I am kinda shaky as usually I would have had about 8 beers by this time of day here.
At the moment, I am just here for now.
For me, right now, it's just one day at a time.
As long as I don't have that first drink, I won't have the 2nd, or the 20th.

ScottFromWI

While I wasn't drinking all day every day towards the end, I was also at the point that I ws not drinking for pleasure, I was drinking to survive and feel normal. That's what scared the crap out of me more than anything. And the good news is you can feel normal ( even good! ) without drinking at all. You know SR is a great place for support, do think you need more help locally too?

Hooped

I've been down this road too many times to count actually.
I've had counseling in the past, been hospitalized a couple of times
went to AA constantly for months.
My best straight stretch at sobriety was my last when I made it almost 9 months.
I felt like I had been reborn.
Personal issues got the better of me though. Deaths in the family, very stressful life issues, and I started drinking again.
I do have tools.
At the moment though...as I say, Its just one day at a time for me right now.

firstymer

Hi, Hooped. I am glad you are here. I will be thinking good thoughts for you.

Hooped

One thing I do recall that sticks out in my mind.
I was once taking a cab to the doctor during a particularly rough detox.
It was quite obvious to the cab driver what condition I was in.
He asked me if I was trying to quit drinking.
Then he told me...and I will never forget this
'Sir, you don't need doctors, or pills to quit drinking"
"What you need...is God"

Raider

Nice to see you Hoop

Mentium

Welcome back! I go to AA, the traditional 'god' place. As it happens I am an atheist too...go figure.

All the very best to you. I know what it is like to try and try again. It wears you out!