In Memory of keyweird

I am recent to recovering my sobriety. I had 10 years at one point, & have had to make some big changes to reacquire myself & get back on track. In doing this I decided that working inside a bar was no longer an option. so, I ventured out & started a cleaning service with a friend that I've known for 20 years. Everything was going fairly well, until this weekend. my partner dropped the ball on a job we had lined up. And, I'm Admin on our website, so, I found in her outbox an E-Mail that she sent to one of our best customers. She wrote this in a "Black-Out" & doesn't remember sending it & refuses to read it. It was pretty explicate & pretty much blamed me, & my being in recovery, for her mistake.
Yes. I know that she still drinks, although she does not drink around me. But, I'm furious that she would throw me under the bus when she needs to address her issues alone. I cant really justify what she did, neither can she. But, I do know that the first & most important thing is to protect myself & my sobriety! I just didn't expect a verbal lashing or sharing such personal information about my recovery (& health) issues!
So, tomorrow, after I've had some cooling time, I plan to address this with her.
I'm going to have to take her email account outta the business (& her as well) if she doesn't step up & take the responsibility for the nightmare that cost us 2 house cleaning jobs that would've netted us roughly $3,600!

Dee74

Sounds like some restructuring is in order keyweird.

D

KristyCat

I assume she's an alcoholic too? Sounds like you might need to go at this business alone if she's drinking and doing these things. First and foremost is you and your sobriety. And it's totally understandable that you want to pull your hair out right now over that, but I would be careful and try not to get so upset that you're vulnerable to drink again.

I know it's hard but try not to let her have that power over you. Remind yourself that actively-drinking alcoholics are likely to blame everyone and the world around them before they'll take responsibility for anything. =/ Just do what's best for you.

longbeachone

I asked my husband about this...As a recovered alcoholic, my answer would be to find out if your partner is willing to go into recovery, ready to admit her problem. Then have a heart to heart talk about what drinking is doing to your business.

Now my husband, on the other hand, is a normie, a sober businessman who has never had a drinking problem. Because he runs a pretty large company, I thought it might be more helpful to hear what he recommended, since he knows a lot more about business than I. He said that the only thing to do, in his opinion, is to find a way to move on without your partner. Buy her out, or tell her to buy you out. He said her refusal to even read the email is so childish and irresponsible that he would question all her work decisions. You run the risk of losing still more clients, and potentially your entire business.

In Memory of keyweird

Thanks Longbeachone, I woke up this morning with a clear head & came to the same conclusion as your husband. I would love to see her get sober, But, I cannot do the work for her. Either in business or sobriety!
I will talk to her today & figure out what's next from there!

choublak

This.