alphaomega

From what I understand through pouring over research, post acute withdrawal, is the single biggest factor in alcoholics and addicts relapsing.

I get that.

I don't have "cravings" per se, in the sense that I want to get drunk. In fact, the longer I'm away from it, the more I abhor it in every sense of the word. I Hate it almost in a respectful sort of way. Like you do the devil.

But, I'm 35 days sober and I feel like sh1t. Not always, but more then I expected to this far along. I'm frustrated and that's when I want to reach for relief. Not to get drunk, but to get out if my body and head for a smidge.

I wanted to reach out to others to hear their experiences with healing back to wellness. I need to be inspired.

Thanks in advance.

Anna

I never experienced PAWS. My recovery was slow and steady, no pink cloud either.

MTD

I don't know where to start. Ive had a few. The anxiety was horrible. I was also on an emotional roller coaster but the worst was not feeling quit right. I felt like I was walking in a foreign land but the longer I am sober the better it gets. I would not give this feeling of sobriety up for anything!! 39 days sober

jutam

I struggled at 6 weeks and again at 3 months so far.... but hung in there. I don't think we can abuse our bodies and brain chemistry that badly and have it spring back after detox.

I keep being told that I can live a life beyond my wildest dreams if I just keep on going... one day addiction will just be somebody we use to know... with no emotional charge because our lives are so far removed from it, our bodies have healed, our minds are clear, we are whole again, we can cope with life.. and it has opened up wonderful opportunities we never could have thought of in addiction....we will look back and know we are blessed and our perseverance even in the ****** moments was well worth it.

sharing this with you reminds me that I also need to keep going when it feels hard... thankyou:

Bird615

When I first sobered up, I had never heard of this, so I don't think it was recognized back then. But I remember the housemother in the halfway house I was in used to say something like this: "Two to five years, two to five...that's how long it takes to get your brains out of hock." It makes me laugh now.

So it looks like they knew something about PAWS or something like it, and just hadn't had that name or known enough about it then.

I'm not sure if I I drank long enough or hard enough this last relapse to end up suffering from PAWS, but I remember that emotional roller coaster/ extreme mood swings, the feeling like S**t, for quite a while after. I was in a treatment centre for the first 35 days and when I got out and into the halfway house, I remember I was absolutely exhausted for a while. But it did get better. Gradually. And better than I had ever dreamed of.

I would encourage someone to take care of themselves as best they can, especially with proper sleep, nutrition and exercise. We've put our bodies and ourselves through an awful lot and it will take some time to recover.

doggonecarl

I think that's a little early for PAWS. You might be suffering from the first stage of withdrawals, the acute stage. Regardless, be careful. It throws a lot of people back into relapse.

What I recall about my experience, at about 6 months, was I got hit with a case of the sads. Sad about wasting so many years drinking. Sad I couldn't drink. Sad I was sad and blaming it on my recovery. Thinking if I'm going to feel like sh1t, I might as well drink. All the danger signs.

It passed, just as advertised.

resolute50

"But, I'm 35 days sober and I feel like sh1t."

I never had this,day 45 for me.
In 4 days I was feeling much better.

sgs

Glad i saw this post. I am day 25 and have been doing great. I have no desire to drink. I have become aware of how much of my life revolved around solo happy hour. I have slept alot and earyten lots of carbs etc. My personal life is pretty good. But--last night i started to feel kind of weird. I woke up a couple of times and then got up and ate some cookies as i felt hungry. I woke up the second time to the phone. I was having busy dreams. Right now i have a dull headache and feel a little shakey. Maybe its just something else......

walktheline1

My worst paws stuff was anxiety. I couldn't drive anywhere except neighborhood streets without going into full blown panic attacks. After being sober for a year all of that anxiety went away though and I was back to "normal".

The second paws thing that hit me was just feeling out of sorts. It was some strange mix of an emotional roller coaster ride and feeling completely lost. That too got better with sobriety and time.

ReadyAtLast

My understanding isthat PAWS kicks in after several month to approx 2 years sober

At 35 days you're still going through early recovery.Whilst the cravings lessen your body and brain are still undergoing massive adjustments and still learning how to live sober. It's normal-if you think it took years for us toget into the states we were in so it will take longer than a few weeks to feel 'normal' if there is such a thing

It really does get better though. I started to feel much better by 3 months and mentally stronger by 5-6 months

dwtbd

Thx ao for the post and thx for the responses, thought maybe I was a little off maybe I was crazy or wasn't 'doing it right', not glad to hear that others have had the experiences just glad to hear it can be 'normal'

ImperfectlyMe

My worst symptoms of paws was APATHY! Sure there were super highs and super lows but the times I felt nothing were the worst. I recall feeling I had lost my "zest" for life found very little pleasure in anything!

Today my 5 month anniversary I am ZESTY again!!!! But haven't put my blinders in because I'm sure the PAWS will sneak up again without warning. And they aren't the cute fury puppy paws they are scary grizzly PAWS!

But for today in this very moment I am alive and I feel fabulous!! And I'm thankful for that.

alphaomega

This is such an inspiration for me. I have all but given up driving and this gives me hope. Thank you for sharing this. THank you so very much.

13unluckyforsom

Had this nothingness feeling last week - it was awful - I'd actually said to a friend 'I felt better when I was drinking I'd energy at least' but yesterday and today have been lots better thankfully. And congrats imperfectlyme on 5months! Superdooper!!!

Mentium

I think the notion of 'PAWS' is debatable, but I don't suppose it matters. People feel crap from time to time well after quitting it seems and so be it.

For me, at 15 days the anxiety is beginning to settle a bit. The most troublesome thing is what I can only call 'over-revving', which is to say, going at things in an agitated and over-rushed sort of manner, with my mind racing.

If I stop a moment and collect my thoughts I can calm myself down, so it isn't major. It isn't conducive to serenity though!

alphaomega

I don't think its debatable.

At least in my experience. Upon reflection, I have realized its these feelings are the reason I have caved in the past. The anxiety, the fatigue, the out of sorts general feeling.

jaynie04

[QUOTE]
I am struggling with apathy too. I have 74 days and for the past 2 weeks I have felt flat. I feel as if I hit the lottery I'd be too lazy to go cash the ticket. The upside is I haven't had many cravings so I am hanging on to that.

huntingtontx

So far no PAWS. Day 63 and feeling pretty good. Not wanting to drink and enjoying the sober life. I can't say that won't change, but so far, so good.

james872

I wouldn't worry about it. I'm on day 26 and my emotions are a bit wonky as well. At the moment I'm feeling better, but I just spent some time being depressed. It came out of nowhere. I think it's the brain re-adjusting. Your brain chemistry needs to return to normal.

The same thing happens when you start or quit anti-depressants. There's a period of 1-2 weeks where you actually feel worse than normal. It's because the brain's chemistry needs to adjust (presumably, there are no conclusive study results on this yet),

I see it as a good thing. Your brain is returning back to normal functioning. Even though it feels bad for a while, it's a signal that you're recovering. Kind of like the initial withdrawals.

Give it some time, it'll pass.

SnoozyQ

Hi alphaomega. What you have described is me to a tee. I kept expecting to start feeling better almost immediately , which i did somewhat on days , but then by day 30 i was feeling that ' foreign feeling ' also. Its taken a while this time , but I'm just starting to feel better now. ( 2 months ) yet still lethargic and unmotivated. My mind is becoming clearer and you" ll know what i mean here,
OUT OF THE FOG.
Its gonna take a long time yet to heal our bodies mentally and physically
I have mostly just wanted to sleep , but worry denies me that.
So glad we have committed to this , stay strong . :-). Xxxx