deeker

Sometimes it amazes me that many people have the answer to addiction and they try to share their suggestions with us and we do everything we can to try to work around taking those suggestions. We continue to do it our way .

You know what the definition of insanity is?

: "The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results."


I remember when I got sick once with bronchitis. I was hacking my brains out and missed work for a couple weeks and I took cough medicine. My sponsor in AA suggested I take in steam.

Yah Yah I thought Thanks, Did I do it ? No!!

Instead I pop a million halls cough drops and end up having a terrible stomach ache and cough for another week. Then she says did you take in the steam like I suggested and I said No.

She says why not I told you it will work.

So I go home boil some water and sit over it and breathe in the steam.
Whatdya know, I stop coughing, my chest feels better and I can return to work.

What is the point I am making?

People in here are giving us suggestions all the time that will lead us to a firm foundation in recovery, but we are unwilling to go to any lengths for our recovery. We think we know what is best for us and we think we know what we need to do to get clean.

Insanity - doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results."

Our best thinking got us into the trouble we are in now. Why would we trust it. If we want to get and stay clean and sober, we should take suggestions from people who are staying clean and sober. It's that simple really.
'

mecanix

I often think the best teaching is that done by way of example .

Bestwishes, m

deeker

I agree, hey Mecaniz u know what? U were the very first person to ever sign into the 24 Hour club! lol

AllieB

I like the (possibly apocryphal or else gleaned from some '90s movie) Native American/First Nation approach. Instead of offering advice, the social convention is to tell a story and let the listener draw his own conclusion.

It's so cool, and so hard to do. Every day I start off with that intention, and by 8:15 a.m. I'm saying "no, no! don't load the coffee maker like that, ya daft fool!"

hypochondriac

I think as addicts we tend towards being control freaks. Well I am anyway. And I see suggestions as criticism. It's a fault I'm working on....

pinkdog

Hi deeker, I totally agree. When I was drinking, even I knew my thinking was muddled. I finally decided to listen to someone whose opinion I valued. I don't think I could've seen it for myself. Hugs to you. Sobriety is best.

IOAA2

Because KISS is often complicated by alcoholics who sometimes suffer from mental losses by drinking.

Fortunately I haven't had a drink since before the internet and couldn't STAY SOBER until I sat up front, took the cotton out of my ears and put it in my mouth, listened and kept coming. No more softer easier plans. Today that's too insensitive for the newcomers. I know things are different today in the alcoholic non thinking I know it all mind but alcohol is the same poison that will blindside us in flash. One fact I like and repeat often is "If we don't pick up the first drink we don't have to get sober AGAIN." That helped me years ago and is effective today. BE WELL

Dee74

I try to share my experience - that's what I see as my job as a member here - the rest is up to anyone who wants to pick up what I'm laying down

If I find I'm frustrated when someone might miss the point I'm trying to make, I think it's on me to deal with that...

and maybe look at my expectations, and my own estimation of my own power

D

Twofish

Hi Deeker, you know when I post something, and I'm very new at this, my desire is for the reader, if they read it, to see where the enabler is coming from, or shall I say the loved one, that person who wants so desperately for the addict to be safe and get better? Does that make you see anything? The pain, the other side of the coin? I feel frustration as much as the addict does, and maybe a post will light up someone's mind, to come back and join this wonderfully sober life we live in. Take care, hugs and keep posting and listening. TF

jaynie04

my desire is for the reader, if they read it, to see where the enabler is coming from, or shall I say the loved one, that person who wants so desperately for the addict to be safe and get better? Does that make you see anything?


Twofish, I have found it enormously helpful to hear about the pain on the other side of the fence, it reminds me that I am not just hurting myself. I had a rough bout of insomnia last night and at 4am in the kitchen after being on here I just had a wave of sadness about the ravages addiction and alcoholism cause. So many families and friends, so much hurt.

Keeping that front and center is, and hopefully always will be, a huge deterrent to picking up.

Anna

I agree with Dee. I have no expectation that anyone should follow my suggestions. I only know what works for me. Each of us must find our own path of recovery.