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It's all bs

Old 09-07-2013, 05:22 AM
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Breaking Thru
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It's all bs

People like me , they tell me they look up to me, don't. It's all bs. I've tried to , live up to your expectations , your desire for me to beat this and I have not. It's bigger than I ever thought, too big for me ? Day 1 for the umteenth time. I'll try to remember , those 19 days . Too get back there . I will damit. I will. I will not quit trying , know that.

Tr
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Old 09-07-2013, 05:32 AM
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Stay strong and right what you did wrong
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Old 09-07-2013, 05:38 AM
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trikyriky, what made you give in? Do you have a plan in place?

I'm glad that you're here.
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Old 09-07-2013, 05:39 AM
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Hey Riky. I still like you, and I still want you to succeed very much. I don't think there's one of us here who doesn't.

The desire to succeed must come from you first and foremost. Let nothing stand in your way. You can do this. Time to get rid of the dealers phone numbers now and make today your last day one x
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Old 09-07-2013, 05:44 AM
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Fortunately people told me to keep coming and trying and eventually I was in a place where I heard what I needed to here that made sense to/for me. " IF I don't pick up the first drink, I don't have to get sober AGAIN." It's worked for a lot of years for a lot of people. BE WELL
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Old 09-07-2013, 05:46 AM
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triktriky, hey we all understand, we're in a battle - and sometimes, we underestimate our enemy and think we can get closer to him than we should or let our defenses down, but we can't - the enemy wants to see us fail, but we have a new choice today.

hello to day 1, here we go...thanks for the post .
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Old 09-07-2013, 05:49 AM
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Welcome back. For me, getting sobriety to finally stick meant realizing that what other people think and say is irrelevant. You, and only you have the power within to beat this thing. And you can...you just have to want it more than using.
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Old 09-07-2013, 05:50 AM
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Hey Ricky ,
wonderd where you got to yesterday .

What are you going to do today ?

Bestwishes, m
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Old 09-07-2013, 05:52 AM
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As alcoholics we like to complicate things. Have you tried the simple solution of going to an AA Meeting everyday and not drinking between meetings? I have seen this work for many. Doing this gives you a ton of support and forces you into a day at time thinking.
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Old 09-07-2013, 05:53 AM
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What are you going to do different my friend?
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Old 09-07-2013, 05:54 AM
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Trikyriky, you are FANTASTIC. Just never give up, rootin for ya. Riky on the 10th, 2 years no cocaine, you can do it.
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Old 09-07-2013, 05:59 AM
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Oh don't even worry about what anyone thinks; we all understand anyway. I personally understand because I've been there myself. I've had so many day 1s but I think it's really sticking this time. I know that this time can stick for you too. Well done on getting back up. It's not how many times we fall down, it's how many times we get back up. So what's the plan?
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Old 09-07-2013, 06:00 AM
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My sponsor says, "What other people think of me is none of my business."
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Old 09-07-2013, 06:19 AM
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It's not too big for you Ricky. You're gonna make it!
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Old 09-07-2013, 06:21 AM
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We'll always look up to you because you keep trying. You will you will you will. Period.
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Old 09-07-2013, 06:25 AM
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Keep trying Riky. You can get those 19 days back and build on them. Stay strong. Best wishes to you.
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Old 09-07-2013, 06:27 AM
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Originally Posted by LadyBlue0527 View Post
trikyriky, what made you give in? Do you have a plan in place?

I'm glad that you're here.
Keep coming back trikyriky, that's what it's all about. I too have had day 1 more times than I can count, but I'm not giving up.

I never know what made me give in??? I think I have impulse issues. It happens so fast. I think, a drink sounds good, boom....I'm at the liquor store...bottle in hand. I tell myself just for today, but then it's off to the races...drink a few days..stop...have withdraws, get deathly ill...shame, guilt, lies, disgust...REPEAT! I'm on day 22 and have been totally surrendering and praying daily to relinquish control. ONE DAY AT A TIME....I know that's all I can do!

Glad you are back, best of luck to ya!!!!
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Old 09-07-2013, 06:32 AM
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TR,

"...tried to....beat this and I have not. It's bigger than I ever thought, too big for me..."
It sounds like you're using the AA program? If so, then that sounds an awful lot like Step 1? Keep going! For me, the only way out, is through (through the steps). Read the 9th step promises...the drink problem can be removed for you.
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Old 09-07-2013, 06:32 AM
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Breaking Thru
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Old 09-07-2013, 07:07 AM
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I agreewith Dylan and the 12 steps can be applied to any addiction. Recovery is an inside job.
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