At work feeling "off"
 

Felt weird vibes from ex. Tonight *sigh* .. Now feelin' all depressed & of course plotting tomorrow :(( I am so tired of being me..

plotting?

Plotting getting wasted tomorrow after work ..

Drinking tomorrow won't change a vibe that is already in the past.

You know that's a road to nowhere at best, AW... And at worst, a road to hell.

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Nope. No you don't! But good job telling us! Haha! I plot that stuff when I'm beginning to trick myself. I am glad you're talking about it

AW...isn't tomorrow day 20 for you? I thought I mentioned it earlier....Come on you have a good head of steam going!

Lord I know; but it just hurts :( I need to get a grasp on it I know... TY All .. Day 20 here I come; hopefully. ?. Break over.

AW, I hope the rest of your night goes well. Day twenty is AWESOME, please keep the forward momentum and stay with us!

There's not a single problem you have that will get any better with a fifth of vodka poured on top of it. Stop punishing yourself for- whatever! Take a chance of staying sober. Give it a real shot. You can always waste your life later.:ring

Days 20-35 are a bit rough, you can get through these days, though!!!

Stay strong, stay stopped, and move forward!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Not a great idea, August.

I understand that you've been in rough waters for quite a while, but why to wrap a rope with a stone attached under your neck?

I am quite at a loss in life myself now - debts, nasty family issues, somewhat life crisis, anxiety, etc. Nothing seems to be under my control.. But still it's under my control how to react:

"..let me perceive purpose in pain and adversity
and see the will of spirits at work
rather than illusion of divine malevolence..."

I keep telling this to myself when it hurts... And it gets better...

Plot for staying sober, for crying outloud)

Stay strong.

TY All .. Well I am home and still want to get wasted:( But going to go to bed cause it was a rough night and I am in serious pain; which is good cause I doubt I will walk the 2miles to get booze now .. Night .. Will check in a couple hours though if I can't sleep and post & post until I don't want it or the "window" of opportunity closes .. Again TY All; means more then you will ever know right now ...
AW

Sorry you are in pain, hope you get some much needed rest. Stay strong!

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Relapses start occuring several months or weeks before the actual drink.

I'm pulling for you August and hope you don't get wasted...once you drink or use all bets are off...

See if you could help somebody who is struggling like you...

Peace and love always.....

In bed w\ my tablet. Can't sleep so thought I would post instead of dragging myself to the store :(

august, since joining 11 days ago, your posts have been really helpful to me, thanks, please don't go out - and i'm praying for you. have a good, sober weekend with no regrets.

Stay in bed, sleep it off. Whatever you're feeling from the ex or elsewhere, let it pass and not overcome you. You're doing something important for yourself, don't let someone else foil that effort.

If you want to be clean forever, you'll undeniably go through similar bouts of emotion. Stay strong and use this as a lesson for how to deal with future feelings.

Thanx, I am fighting it. Strange thing is, all seemed fine this am when she got up for work. But again I am in an awkward situation anyway :( Again Thanx

Keep posting...do you have someone to talk to? I have had a couple urges that I did not think I could get through but hearing the absurdity of what I was saying to my sponsor or my father seems to help get me off the ledge each time. Maybe hit the gym or do a yoga class too (not sure if your into this).

Good luck - if I go back and look at your posts, you have come too far to cave to the AV.