At work feeling "off"
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Join Date: May 2013
Location: Boston, MA.
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Yoga\gym are out & sadly no one I can talk to. Or at least has gotten back to me... so just the lovely group of people here. Back is feeling a lil better to. But not sure if that is a good thing or bad thing right now.
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Join Date: Nov 2012
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It's ok August, you are in the difficult part right now. The restless feeling comes from doing something besides drinking. Do anything, yodel, lace your sneakers up a cool way, read a World History book, stand on your bed and sing, sketch, go buy a plant.....just don't drink!
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Something that helps me a lot is to read people's first posts. Because we all come in on our knees and sometimes remembering how horrible things can get reminds us that we don't ever want to go there again.
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I am fighting it .. Trying to let my "window" be slammed shut at least *sigh* Someone finally did get back to me; but working nights; just means they are working days so they are at work :p lol
(sorry thats the best I could find lol)
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Thanx jayne, but public\any more then 2 people I don't know are not my thing 
Not to mention travel times & all would wreck me for work tonight. But thanx. Right now just gonna hang here. My window is slowly closing & am not craving any more. Just the feelings of wanting to escape now
Not to mention travel times & all would wreck me for work tonight. But thanx. Right now just gonna hang here. My window is slowly closing & am not craving any more. Just the feelings of wanting to escape now EndGame
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: New York, NY
Posts: 4,677
When I first got sober and remained sober for twenty five years, I lost the obsession to drink almost immediately, and it never came back. No cravings, no secret planning to drink, no thoughts of how things would be better with a drink. Nothing. When I picked up, it was more about years of faulty thinking and bad behaviors than it was about cravings.
After my three-year relapse, I struggled with cravings and the obsession to drink almost every minute of every day for a year. Had I gone anywhere that alcohol was available, I've little doubt I would have a drink, and then many more after that. I was going to six or seven AA meetings each week, and I talked about it as often as I could. When at meetings where few or no people knew me, a brigade of people with long-term sobriety would descend upon me to offer help after the meeting, steering me to someone who'd be a good sponsor, and frantically scribbling their phone numbers so that I could call them before I picked up the drink.
What I'm saying is that, the drunk I was during and after my relapse was not the same drunk I was when I got sober. I was much worse, and I was hell bent on dying as an active alcoholic. Both my withdrawal and my recovery were infinitely more difficult and more painful than the first time. I had to work very hard to stay sane and sober.
After two years back, and though I remain somewhat vulnerable, I doubt I would avoid an important occasion because alcohol is being served, though I still don't do such things of my own volition.
Getting sobriety is much easier than keeping it. I have a stubborn streak (which I've learned to turn into a strength instead of a weakness), and I believe that and will power got me through the early months. But willpower would only take me so far, and I knew it. What I needed was a commitment to not drink no matter what, and a leap of faith that there was a better way for me.
Your reaching out here can help you stay sober until you come to a time when embracing the challenge of living a better life will overshadow the pain of wanting to drink and the struggle to stay sober. All you need to do is put in the work. That's a promise.
After my three-year relapse, I struggled with cravings and the obsession to drink almost every minute of every day for a year. Had I gone anywhere that alcohol was available, I've little doubt I would have a drink, and then many more after that. I was going to six or seven AA meetings each week, and I talked about it as often as I could. When at meetings where few or no people knew me, a brigade of people with long-term sobriety would descend upon me to offer help after the meeting, steering me to someone who'd be a good sponsor, and frantically scribbling their phone numbers so that I could call them before I picked up the drink.
What I'm saying is that, the drunk I was during and after my relapse was not the same drunk I was when I got sober. I was much worse, and I was hell bent on dying as an active alcoholic. Both my withdrawal and my recovery were infinitely more difficult and more painful than the first time. I had to work very hard to stay sane and sober.
After two years back, and though I remain somewhat vulnerable, I doubt I would avoid an important occasion because alcohol is being served, though I still don't do such things of my own volition.
Getting sobriety is much easier than keeping it. I have a stubborn streak (which I've learned to turn into a strength instead of a weakness), and I believe that and will power got me through the early months. But willpower would only take me so far, and I knew it. What I needed was a commitment to not drink no matter what, and a leap of faith that there was a better way for me.
Your reaching out here can help you stay sober until you come to a time when embracing the challenge of living a better life will overshadow the pain of wanting to drink and the struggle to stay sober. All you need to do is put in the work. That's a promise.
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Thank You EndGame .. So much .. I am as I said fighting; it is so hard in my situation right now .. At least at times it is .. The whole vibe thing; I think was my AV trying to convince me to have a "few" and now I think it isn't the AV as much as it is ME Wanting to "take a break" from all that I have been through and am going through .. I am in limbo on a few things b\c of red tape and that doesn't help..
The whole prospect that certain things in my life right now; are NOT up to me has me at my wits end .. But I am pushing forward and past this as Best I can .. Again TY
Wanting to "take a break" from all that I have been through and am going through .. I am in limbo on a few things b\c of red tape and that doesn't help..The whole prospect that certain things in my life right now; are NOT up to me has me at my wits end .. But I am pushing forward and past this as Best I can .. Again TY
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