Eliasson

It's only Day One. But my husband is screaming at me. And normally I'd escape into my wine. I'm trying so hard not to do that. I just don't know how to cope without it. I really hate my life and I don't know how to make it different except to try to stay sober. And staying sober is so hard. I'm sorry I don't even know what my point is but I am really having a difficult time tonight and I want so badly to make it through today without drinking.

Hevyn

I'm sorry Eliasson. It is hard in the beginning - but the more you learn to deal with things without it, the stronger you'll become. I used it to cope - got numb all the time when there was trouble. Instead of helping myself I was just becoming weaker and less able to make changes in my life. You can work on your problems better with a clear head.

Keep posting and lean on the people here - we've all been through these times and we understand. Nothing will be made any better by taking a drink. I'm glad you reached out for some help.

kittycat3

You got this!

CuteNGayYay

Keep posting. Anytime u have the urge post about it. It helps

Threshold

I am so glad you are back.

DrunkenBob

Why is your husband screaming at you???

No matter why - drinking will not help. Sorry you are struggling but I think if you make it through the day you will feel better about things tomorrow.

faceitandfixit

You're doing the right thing, Eliasson...not drinking. Just don't pick up tonight, go to sleep early if you can. You'll be glad you didn't drink in the morning Hang in there xo

foolsgold66

Drunk won't fix the screaming. Hang in there!

iamjerry

Well you have a big delema on your hands, My suggestion is try not to engage with him go to a meeting and tell them what you told us so you can find someone close to you to confide in. Staying sober is difficult enough single but being in a relationship and trying to get and stay sober is hard but there is HOPE. get by yourself and read stories in the back of the big book.

alphaomega

I remember thinking the same thing - how will I get through my out of control life without my wine ? Then one of my SR friends told me, your life is out if control BECAUSE of your drinking. Once I strung a few sober days together, I began to realize how all my boundaries became non existent in my drinking days.

Perhaps you will find the same.

Be well.