Kys

The reality is I'm not going to stop drinking completely. I'm sorry, it's just the truth.

Sure, I want to stop the drinking behaviour I've fallen into over the past year and a half, but I'm not planning on quitting completely. That's why I've never said it. Really I want to abstain long enough to gain control again. My life circumstance changed a year and a half ago too, and then started my serious abuse of alcohol too.


I'm so thankful to the people here. I've drank less since coming here, but as above, I'm really wasting your time.


Dee, I wish I had the words. You deserve endless happiness.

lorelei

kys, I don't think we have crossed paths to talk too properly, but I really don't see how you are wasting peoples time, recovery comes in many forms, there's room for us all surely? please think about your choice.. L x

IOAA2

Kys. It's your choice and the door is open for your return. "I want to abstain long enough to gain control again."
I was told that if I need to control my drinking I've already lost control. Believe me I tried for 2 years and it was not nice at all as it got worse in a hurry. BE WELL

freshstart57

For most of us, the only way we found to stop problematic drinking behavior was to stop drinking. Period. No middle ground for us.

This is not true for everyone of course, as all generalities are false (except this one!). I wish you well on your journey.

ZoeM

Kys.. None of us woke up bored one morning and decided to join an alcohol/drug support forum, simply for 'something to do'. Something, some worry, brought you to us didn't it

Please think about the choice you are making. I for one would miss you if you left.

Not really sure what else to say, so will just send you a hug and leave it with you.

Dee74

Believe it or not you deserve endless happiness too Kys

unfortunately that's the great pipe dream of every alcoholic, Kys.

I desperately wanted it to be true - that I could still drink and yet find a measure of control.

I tried for 20 years.

No time off is ever going to reset you Kys, no amount of taking a break is going to give you the control you seek...especially if you can't even get more than a few days sober to begin with.

I'm not trying to be cruel.

I think it's important to see the pipe dream for what it is - a fantasy - and to just...let it go.

Your happiness lies in another direction Kys, and depends on you facing reality, not running away from it.

I hope you can accept that some day soon.

D

foolsgold66

If this is helping you drink less, please stay.

Kys

I'm here. In tears but I'm here.

Lionhearted1

the greatest illusion of every alcoholic is that someday he or she will be able to control there alcohol like a normal person....

alcohol is the biggest illusion known to man, its effect for someone like me is so elusive that I will chase it to the gates of hell..

ReadyAtLast

Most of us wanted this too kys. The problem is that taking a break,abstaining even cutting down for a period of time doesn't lead us to then be able tocontrol it. once we've lost control of our drinking it's already controlling us.

Please don't look at this as some form of weakness or lack of self control,it just is what it is.

I hope you stick around. Maybe in time you'll want to quit. For now, hopefully our stories may help you

lorelei

aw Kys... **hugs** you know there's a problem, if you aren't ready to deal with it just yet, doesn't mean you have to go anywhere, keep posting, draw strength from your friends, and when YOU are ready...it will be the right time to give up completely. x

misspond

Kys, we've never crossed paths here before, but your post really touched me. If you do decide to wander off don't go away forever, and know that you're always able to come back, even if you only wander off for a minute, or if you stay away for years.

bigsombrero

Stick with it Kys - what do you have to lose? What do you have to go back to? This is a great, exciting time in your life and you can change course and right the ship. There are many here struggling with quitting. It can seem like a mountain, and it is. It starts with small steps. We have all been there, whether it's step 1 or step 5000. Letting go of a drinking life is very hard, there is a grieving process and that's okay. Just hang on, stick around.

gatorgirl67

Hi Kys,

I haven't posted in a while, but I'm here reading pretty much every day. I am in the same boat as you, but I still come here to see the light at the end of the tunnel that others have experienced. Stay here with me, please....I need others like you so we can get through this together.

GG

ZoeM

Hope by all the responses, you now realise how much you are loved and cared for on here

LadyinBC

You are not wasting anyones times. I had to reach a certain point before I quit. Maybe that is what you have to do to.

You lose nothing by staying here, you have lots to gain even if you just stick around and read the posts. You found this site for a reason.

Lightning Bug

No matter how much or how little anyone drinks or uses, if SR helps you, please stay.

13unluckyforsom

We haven't really spoke either but I think it can't do you any harm to stick around. Even if your not wanting to commit 100% there's still advice and support you can relate to I'm sure. I think you should stay maybe talk it through a wee bit. See if we can all help you deal with things perhaps even only sometimes without drinking if its too big a step to say 'never again' for you right now. Just for now we could help you x

13unluckyforsom

If you want - you have to want it to get it

Kys

I'm reading your posts like one would the last page of a novel that you never want to end.

All of you, thank you.


I'll read. I'll post when the times are right for me. I hope that doesn't sound selfish. I'm putting too much pressure on myself at the moment.